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The Day Everything Blew Up

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Randy, Sep 2, 2013.

  1. Randy

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    If y'all read my last thread, this is a continuation of it. If not, it's titled "It's done." So what basically happened was that my mom came home from work and was like "Before you head back to [City], dad & I want to have a word with you." I knew what it was about, my heart started racing, I got a feeling that I never got before, I think I had a panic attack when I heard those words because I really thought that everything was out in the open well I thought wrong. Some of the highlights were me yelling at some points in this, her crying while speaking and a couple of other things. To my surprise, she actually agreed with me that the bible says nothing about homosexuality being a sin. I was stunned by this. She said she looked up some theories by people that say the homosexuality is NOT a sin, one such (crackpot) theory is that Jesus was a homosexual. I agreed with them on the point that Jesus was not a homosexual, that's just about the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my life. She also went on to say something like "Does The Village say homosexuality is okay?" or something like that. She was also like "I have a lot of people praying for you" and "I hope to see you in Heaven on Judgement Day." I was like "You will see me in Heaven." To that she asked me "Why?" I was like "We're all made in God's image". And she was like "Well, Jesus was not a homosexual." This went on for about 10 minutes >.> On top of this, I got called disgusting human being, and if I go to the meetings, I'm even more disgusting.

    And she ended it by saying "Well, if you need any money, don't ask me." I could have saw that coming so after she said that, I asked "Well what about my last two years of college" and that's where my dad came in and was like, "The money that we're using is a loan from us, that you'll repay." I was so happy when I heard that from my dad. Furthermore, if any of my friends come over (straight or not), both my friend & I will be shown the front door.

    On the ride up to [City], the conversation carried on more and I was like "There's four movies that I want you to see, but I don't want you to watch them right at this moment." To that her reply was: "There's nothing that will make me change my mind." I guess I should have included that she will not approve, accept or tolerate it.

    I guess I ripped off the band-aid on this issue so-to-speak.


    If you're wondering how I am right now: I am in my dorm right now and I'm sort of happy. I learned that I can't control how people will react, if they don't like it then it's their problem and not mine. Right after that confrontation, I was so angry that I couldn't even think straight and the tension was so thick afterwards that I felt like I should get back as soon as possible.
     
  2. GirlWhoWaited

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    Congrats on your courage. I genuinely hope your family comes to fully embrace you for who you are. You did a brave thing. (*hug*)
     
  3. Chip

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    Well first... it sounds like you handled yourself extremely well and stood up to the badgering you took from them. Congratulations both on that, and on addressing the elephant in the room.

    Second, it's hard to say, but my guess is that over time, your mom, as hard as it may be to believe now, will probably come around. Particularly if you can get her to watch Matthew Vines, Prayers for Bobby, and For the Bible Tells Me So... but even if not, at some point she'll realize that it's a choice of either having you in her life or not, and I seriously doubt she'd choose not to have you in her life.

    And third, it sounds like your dad is being a lot more reasonable and that, too, is a really good sign, as he'll be talking to your mom nonstop about this and, hopefully, helping her to see reason.

    Finally, your attitude about not being able to control others' feelings is really healthy and, while it doesn't take away the sting, it does help you realize that you have to do what's right for you... and that's a big step forward.
     
  4. Holly

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    Well done for standing up to yourself! It must have been really hard.

    I hope things get better for you.
     
  5. kresukun

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    Firstly you need a hug (*hug*)

    I am proud of you for standing your ground and not diminishing who you are so good job on that part :thumbsup:

    Your parents are also being very reasonable, I think in more time they will become more comfortable and accepting.

    I am obviously not very good at giving pep-talks but I tried my best :lol:

    What I want you to take away from this is that you are who you are, and we wouldn't want you to change. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:
     
  6. Ticklish Fish

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    (so I came here after coming from phospholipase's wall)

    Aw <3 Congratulations! I wish you for the better!
     
  7. hitgirl

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    Well done for handling this, it must have been hard but you sound like you're coping really well. And even if you find yourself not coping, you should still be proud of yourself and you'll get through it. :slight_smile:
     
  8. Randy

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    I'm actually coping with it really well. I'm just living my life how I want to live it and not how other people want me to live my life.

    A couple nights ago, I recieved an email from my mom essentially saying that only God can judge who gets into heaven and so it's not her place to judge. Also that nobody is perfect, only He is perfect. So I interpreted that as a good sign and became MUCH happier after reading that. They're also wondering why I haven't told them before (which I explained in my letter) or why I told them at all.

    I guess their questions for me can be interpreted that they will love me unconditionally; of course, that is how I interpreted it.
     
  9. AlexTheBlogger

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    Congratulations for being so brave!
    I'm very happy for you :grin:
     
  10. Miles16

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    Congrats man. That takes guts.

    Also good to hear your mom seems to be coming around.