Hi to all well my girl and I just wanted to share our story with others and the thoughts and battles of their partner, ive decided to write this as we can't seem to find anything on this subject regarding the partner of someone who is bisexual. I am a male of 45 who has been bisexual as long as i can remember, I have suppressed my bi feelings for many years telling myself its dirty, there is something wrong with me, people wouldn't understand etc...So for nearly 30 years this has been locked away secretly watching bisexual/gay porn. I finally came out to my girlfriend I was Bi since we have known each other 23 years although not been together for 23 years. At first my girlfriend was a little shocked but at the same time she was ok with this, and was really great helping me over come my feelings of I am not gay and its not dirty etc, we spoke everyday about these feelings to the point we decided it was time for me to act upon them. Although these feelings where fairly strong by now I wasn't sure what I truly wanted to experience, I had idea's and pretty happy to just go with the flow of things, my girl did however started to have reservations about what kind of sexual acts id be doing, so I advertise for another bisexual man but also had to put what my girl didn't want for me to do etc... This was all fine for a short time then my girl one day said that she couldn't handle all this, it was too much for her knowing i am going to be having sex with someone else whether male or female, regarding my thoughts I am head over heels in love with my girl so to me being with another woman is a massive NO but in my mind ive easily separated the two, I have no thoughts what's so ever about lovely dovey stuff towards a man and holding and kissing etc all this has only ever been for my girlfriend, I don't actually find men attractive its just one thing I want to use and that's all, my girl sort of believed me but i new she was holding back on her true feelings, I am pretty good at reading her but still couldn't get my head around what was really on her mind. One day we had a small argument as all couples do but a few days later i found out she'd told someone I was Bisexual !! OMG all i could feel was betrayal and anger that my girl had told someone about my secret, Anyway after the mist had settled we sat down in fact over several days just talking, i am not good at talking really but for once I sat and listened to my girl but really listened to her. She explained I was her world and true love for 23 years and she really does love me, but was finding it hard sorta accepting my Bi side, Id been on a bit of a roller coaster since i told her as one minute she was accepting of it then she wasn't it just seemed to play games with my mind, so id feel mad that she would say No I can't explore my Bi side then yes ok but you can only do this or that etc, then even yes she was fine go for gold so to speak... In all of this i thought it was just about me after all its me who is Bi and struggled with my bi side, I never even thought about my girls feelings who i love and adore, I never took into account its not about me and didn't relise she had to over come and allow / accept me having sexual contact with another person, I never even considered this and the impact on her and our relationship, We absolutely adore and love each other and there will never be another woman for me, but if I hadn't sat down and really listened to my girl and her feelings I believe this would have split us apart... All this is going to be a life long journey for both of us she is feelings so much better about it know but so am I. The Key is Talk and keep talking really listen to what your partner is telling you and take their feelings on board, its ok for you as the bi person to get confused and feelings to go up and down, but remember your partners feeling will keep changing as well, I always new my girl loved it when i told her i loved her, but hadn't relised she does have issues with insecurity and thinks I may leave her for another woman,,,Is she crazy omg my life without her NO WAY What my girl wanted and needed was bundles of love and affection, which isn't hard to give her she just needed it in double doses and for her to know how much i really do love her,,,we have named our new love "Mushy Pea" and now she says our relationship is like an brand new one and she is loving the newer us but so am I, we have always had a great sex life but now its gone to new heights and its just so brill what we have for each other, she is now great in dealing with my bi side and just says ye go for gold but keep safe, she doesn't want to know if i ever meet up with a man so i tell her nothing unless she asked me to, I will never have secrets from her and she has the passwords to my sights I use, but she adores our mushy pea love, but she has a new respect for me in that ive actually listened to her feelings, now we can't stop gazing into each others eyes and been like two teenagers again....lol Yes i am still Bi and always will be but i am actually glad she told someone now that i am bi, it was a release for her but also really helped our relationship out and dealing with my bisexuality. Just want to finish by saying hope this will help someone else out in a similar relationship, we have both said if we can help others we will but Talking is defiantly the key and listen guys really listen to your girl, us men arn't to good at this but you need to be, everyday our love and strength just keeps growing now and I am so lucky to have a woman like this in my life.... Love you so much
