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My story (what a cliche title)

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Micah, Feb 22, 2007.

  1. Micah

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    A few members have messaged me about my coming out story - and I realised I've never really posted the whole thing. Tho' this is mainly due to the fact that I was a part of empty closets before I even told my first person :icon_wink

    My process has been a long one - I think its important to go at your own pace. Afterall - coming out is your own journey.

    At the age of 16 (Year 10), I went to an all boys school here in Melbourne. I had a small group of friends who I would hang out with. I was extremely shy (something that I find amusing when I look back on it), and would usually only hang out with my really close friends.

    My friends were average guys, into sports, video games etc - but they weren't exactly accepting of gays. The topic had been brought up before - and while they weren't "dire gay bashers" they werent friendly either.

    To make things worse my own family were even less accepting towards homosexuality - my parents are christian. My mum used to say "being gay is not what we were made for" - and as such any programs that had anything remotely to do with homosexuality were banned in the house (even a TV show called "the block" - where a gay couple renovated a house)

    ---------------------------------------------
    At this point in time, my sexual experiences consisted of
    • Fooling around with a number of guys in primary school (6-12 years of age)
    • Secretly fooling around with a boy under the covers at a sleep over party (14 years of age)

    In summary - my "fooling around" with a boy got out around school, and I was bullied quite a lot. Of course, at that time I was far from confident in myself, which made me an easy target. However - at the end of that year I moved to a new school (year 9 - the all boys school I mentioned). This had nothing to do with being bullied tho. I was an extremely capable student, and my principle invited me into her office and offered me a scholarship to stay.

    ---------------------------------------------

    So at my new school, I would do anything in my power to avoid being bullied about my sexuality again - and my homophobic friends were a constant signal to remain in the closet.

    It was at the start of year 10 (just before turning 16), that I joined ### (the over 18 version of Empty Closets) in the hopes of finding my identity. I thought I was bisexual - but with the religion pushed into my head - it just felt so wrong/shameful.

    On ### - It was quickly discovered that I was underage (*cough* TriBi *cough*) and I was sent here (Tho I have to mention that Tribi helped me through some problems, and we became friends).

    After spending some time on EC - I told my first person that I was bi ( OLD OLD thread here about it), tho I later told her I was gay.

    Half way through that year, I went on an excursion with school - it consisted of 20 year 9s and 4 year 10s. Us year 10 guys stuck together. It was here I met a guy called Kane. I had a feeling he was gay - but for obvious reasons I was too scared to suss it out.

    A few days later I was searching through some online gay youth profiles and I found his. It was quite a coincidence really. Anyhow - I messaged him, and we found out we were both in similar situations.

    We ended up going to the local underage dance club together and becoming close friends. By the start of year 11 (17 years old) we were best friends - it was with Kane that my confidence in myself and my sexuality grew. I updated my style, made more friends and generally became better known.

    By now I had told most of my friends outside of school - tho besides Kane, no one at school knew. Throughout year 11 I made more friends outside of school, gay friends in particular.

    At the end of year 11 - anyone who didnt know Kane and I thought there was something between us (this was pretty much due to the fact that we were together all the time) - However, what made our friendship so unique was that we were best friends - who just happened to both be gay (we had never slept with each other etc - which I believe made our friendship stronger).

    So at the end of the year we both told our close friends at school. His friends took it exceptionally well. Most of mine took it equally as well - but at the same time a few were undecided (they soon realised that it didnt change who i was tho'). Rumours spread and basically everyone knew about it - but it wasnt really spoken about.

    Over summer break (from year 11 to year 12) I turned 18. I had about 60 people at my party (my parents went away so I could have it). But my older brothers were going to be there, (at the time I wasnt out to them).

    So I went out with my brothers individually and told them. They were way cool with it - Pretty much the best response I've ever got from people. They were just like "makes no difference to me - i look forward to having your friends hit on me!" :slight_smile:

    Soon after I told my younger sister over dinner.

    When I got back to school (year 12 - 18 years old - 4 weeks ago) I changed my Myspace to "gay" (before I just left it blank). Since then I've had a few people come up to me about it - but its all been positive so far. Mostly its just

    Them: "hey micah...are you gay?"
    Me: "yup :slight_smile:"
    them: "ah k cause I saw it on your myspace - cool"

    So as it stands I'm out to everyone except my parents. It feels good. My brothers have recommended I tell my parents after I leave home - which is best for a few reasons (mostly for their sanity).

    Until then I'll let them think whatever they like - maybe drop a few more hints or 3. :wink:

    We'll see how that goes!
     
  2. TriBi

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    Great post Dave! *cough, cough*...:grin: :lol: (*hug*)
     
  3. Will1975

    Will1975 Guest

    Yes.. Good post..
     
  4. Jamie

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    awesome story micah... well done!!!
     
  5. Paul_UK

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    Great post Dave. It's good to have it all summarised in the one post like that, rather than bits here and there.
     
  6. Jamie

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    I dunno... i remember it was quite a challenge to find all the bits before... I love a challenge :wink:
     
  7. Proud1p4

    Proud1p4 Guest

    At first when you were explaining the fooling around with boys 6-12 years of age....i thought you were still speaking in terms of your current age. I think i just about drowned myself coughing up the water i was drinking....made an awful mess too....I later found out you were speaking in retrospect and started breathing again. :lol:
     
  8. Endlessnight500

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    Hey, Great story, im glad you had such support. and im happy it turned out good with your brothers and sister...Hope it goes as well with you parents. Good Luck :slight_smile:
     
  9. Micah

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    Who said I wasnt? Haha! Totally kidding (I was of course the same age as the boys)