Sorry for the long one, just kept typing I came out to my mom like one week ago, and my father game back to Belgium (he lives in another country) this weekend. On a wedding he asked me that he wanted to talk. It seemed my mom told him, while telling him, someone else of my family heard, told her son, and her son then told my dad to that he heard something like this. Now this is all alright with me, since I actually already told my friends they can tell anyone,anyone asking gets a straight yes and so on. I'm going all out, changing facebook cover photo's today in something gayisch to get the message out faster. but yeah, the talk. He kept asking how I know, telling me other gay people told him the same (that you just know). I didn't want to go into detail how I knew, because that could get awkward (porn). He even asked me if I ever kissed a boy (answered "no") and then how I could know if I really only had feelings for boys. Then he went to the "it's a fase" thing kinda. Like: keep your options open, don't just ditch women, you still have your whole life, it's a big step to say your gay. He said this on a more "subtle" way though. This was a shock: my mom just said "okay, that's who you are, you can't do anything about it, I still love you, it doesn't matter". My dad just said these things, what kinda hurt, because it was totally unexpected. Thinking it's a fase??? I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT FOR LIKE 1.5 YEARS, I think I'm quit sure, testing myself and so on, just to be sure, and then he's getting me to doubt myself ... of course at the end he went to the: you can always talk to me about it, keep me informed, well, I won't. I don't really wanne talk about it anyway, it isn't that interesting, I'm gay, that's that. Nothing special or anything. Also in like the middle, he asked if I asked people or talked with people about it. Then I dropped in "the internet and a website". I talked about this website, AND OF COURSE thinking this website is a mafia thing, or people on here that try to get my information and so on. That I shouldn't search the internet, but start with just talking to people. I think he didn't realise I've been searching and reading on the internet for already 1.5 years ... He's kinda late ... Also, at the end he said " I won't tell anyone". TO LATE, already decided 2 weeks ago that I'm going all out, that's why I told my mom, the rest will now via my rainbow wrtistband that I've been wearing for a week, or he facebook cover photo and shit. I WILL NOT TAKE MY DAD'S ADVICE "don't drop the women". I though I had feelings in the past, but that's just because of society. I don't have any anymore, and also keep looking at the boys, can't get my eyes of them. Always checking them out. Wondering if they have a six pack and so on. I'm gay, that's it, my dad will not control my life. now, what I didn't tell you is that my older brother also had problems with him. He tried to split him and his girfriend up (who already were together for 6 years, and now 8) because he though it was a distraction for his studies and so on... But yeah, that's my story, thanks for reading, I know it's long
Good for you! You're a lot braver than me (I'm not publicly coming out until senior year). I hope that your father may understand in the future (I know how parents can be sometimes, ughh). PS It's not too long. I've read much longer on other forums about much simpler subjects. Never downsize what you want to convey
Good for you holy cow you're so brave...I really want to tell my mom but I'm too scared... Oh my gosh you are SO brave.....I wish i could do that...your parents seem pretty cool about it...but you know remember that when you first realized it you probably weren't sure if it was a phase, so they are going through the same stages of acceptance you did chances are in 1.5 years your father will be way more accepting...good luck
Just remember - it can't be easy for him. He needs to take everything into account and at first he may not comprehend, let alone understand. He may think - it's just a phase. But... from what you have said... I feel he will come round Don't take it too hard - all the best
wow, long time that I've actually been on the forums Oo he hasn't actually spoken to me about it, and I don't really care anymore, he can think what he wants, and I'm sure he'll come to his senses eventually (maybe he already did).
