Okay I'm already out to my family but i haven't told many friends. So I wasn't expecting to get hurt by the people in already told. you know like rude comments and such. but today my sister has been giving such a hard time. I was cooking dinner and my best friend was over (she knows i'm bi) and they were making comments about me liking girls. They would say 'oh morgan would like that' referenicing some sexual act they are talking about. but the worst so far was tonight at dinner we were discussing being gay and lesbians and how they get made fun of and my mom was saying 'people think the gay is like a disease and people think they will catch it if you're around them to much. that's why they are so mean and make comments." then my sister adds in "but don't you? you know you're around them and then you start acting gay..." then she saw the look of hurt on my face. my mom reassured her that you certainly do NOT but i was already stomping off to my room and slamming to door. that is why i'm here now typign this. why do people have to hate and be so rude. this makes me even more scared to come out to my other friends because of how they'll react and iff they will tell the whole school. i already get made fun of for going to an all girl school (they call the school "lezzywood' becuase people from other schools, even otehr all girls schools think it's an all lesbian school) those comments enough hurt. i'm just really sick of being told these comments form my SISTER for God's sake! seriously i thought it would be my family to support me but apparently no one cares about MY feelings. they only care about the laugh they get from it. Has anyone else experienced things like this? i knew going down this road would be tough but i have no choice...
It seem to be a common pastime lampooning gays. Have you talked with your sister about how those things make you feel?
I hear rude comments all the time at work. People seem to think it's so funny and clever to put down gays for some reason. A few people at work will make fun of anything that they see as even remotely gay related. Examples include glow-sticks, banana dipped in chocolate pudding, a rubber glove filled with hand lotion, many South Park episodes/characters. The ironic part is that I hear it most from people who claim to be gay friendly or are themselves part of a racial minority group. These people say they have gay friends or relatives and are "cool with it." Yet any chance they get to ridicule gays seems to bring them much laughter. Another example, they will use the term "life partner" as though the idea is a joke and it is some sort of a rip on someone. They try to be so subtle about it since it is supposed to be an accepting workplace by the company's harrasment policy. I never hear these kinds of comments from people who are actually mature and respectful. It's just sad that they hired these few childish a-holes who love to band together and feed off each other's ignorance, and that I work within earshot of them. They love putting down people in general, but their favorite target group is gays.
The classic thing, of questioning their sexuality in your mind, really does work I've found. I still look like a girl, so I don't get as much flak as gay men do. Sometimes (and this seriously depends on your school/work/friend situation), being proactive and flamboyant and messing with their heads can work too. If you're really, really out, people just assume that you're confident and that you're also politically correct enough to scare the bejeezus out of them if they say things like that around you.
Hey, To do with your sister... Well I'm not sure if if this is it.. but siblings seem to want to annoy the other one(s) at times when are not appropriate. Even if they know it will hurt the other, they will anyways just because that is what siblings do.. in some families(like mine). I don't have the same problem you do because I have not come out yet. I have one brother that likes to annoy me a lot. It seemed very similar to what you talked about. Don't worry about telling your friends. I believe they will take it better than your sister did and won't say "rude" comments to you. If they don't approve... then they were not very good friends after all. But take your time and only come out to them when you are ready to. Hope your sister will have a full understanding of you soon . Rob
