My mind is still racing so this may not be my most literate post ever, but thank you to anybody who reads it. Today has been the day that I prayed would never have to happen when I first began to question my sexuality, and the day that I've been putting off ever since I came to the firm realisation that I am gay. Only through the support of some of my friends who I'm out to was I finally able to make the decision to come out to my parents, mostly because I'm sick of hiding and I don't feel like my life can truly start while I'm out to some people and lying to others. I settled on today's date because it's after Christmas and New Year so I can't ruin any celebrations, but I've got another week before returning to uni so I'm not dropping a bombshell and running off. I'd been building myself up to it all evening, and it was the scariest thing I've ever had to do. I couldn't find the words at first, even though I'd prepared them earlier on, and I just ended up croaking it out. The reaction was fine - as good as I could have expected, really. My dad said it doesn't make any difference and my mum that she still loves me. I was going to come out on Facebook afterwards but that's on hold because my mum wants me to tell my sister first (I'm not going to see her until late February and there's no way I'm waiting that long, so I'll probably draft an email tomorrow). I should be thrilled that the reception was so positive, and I will be, I'm still just caught in a bit of a "What have I done?!" head state - but I felt exactly the same after coming out to my best friend, so I know that it will get better and I'll begin to feel more comfortable. I'm just not looking forward to the awkward transition period where we all adjust to me being out. I did ask as well if they suspected - my dad said he'd had no idea, and my mum that she hadn't known, but could see the pieces were there in retrospect (exactly the same as my best friend said). I also gave them all the PFLAG information and such, but I don't think they were over enthused - happy enough just to go with the flow. So that's it! I'm out to my parents, they're going to help with the rest of my extended family, and once I've told my sister tomorrow, I will get on Facebook and be officially out to the world. Even flashing back to this time last year, a day like today would have seemed on the most distant of horizons. I have to keep pinching myself to prove that it's really real, that I really found the courage to do this. Even though I'm nervous of what the next few days will be like, I do feel an enormous sense of relief, and I can't wait to get out there and just start living my life outside the closet. (&&&)(&&&)(&&&)(&&&)(&&&)
That's great. It sounds like it couldn't have gone better Good luck with the rest of the coming out process.
Awesome stuff mate, must be a relief for you now. You should change that User Title of yours though, I'm sure that can't be true.
