1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

[The letter] Mum [in the underwear drawer]

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by GlindaRose, Jun 28, 2008.

  1. GlindaRose

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,230
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Well, this is effectively my 2nd coming-out to mum. I did so once before, but it seemed that she'd forgotten so I decided to do it again.

    I acted upon the advice I received from a thread in the 'support and advice' section (called 'sick of my mum's attitude'). I wrote her a letter to remind her I'm gay, and please stop talking about boyfriends.

    I put it in her underwear drawer (lol) because that was a place where she would find it and dad wouldn't (I'm not out to him). That night I slept over at a friend's house (Convenient timing, eh?).

    Today my mum came to pick me up, and for the first half of the car journey home she didn't say anything but just made general conversation. I was kinda worried because I was like, 'Is she going to ignore it completely?'

    However, eventually she said 'I got your letter'. She told me that she hadn't forgotten, and she was accepting, although admittedly she added 'On the off-chance that you get a boyfriend...' and she also said 'If you get a girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever...'

    I asked her why she kept bringing up boyfriends and she was like, 'I was just making general conversation.' and I was like, 'You've been acting as if you've completely forgotten.' She was like, 'So how am I supposed to "act" then? I'm just acting normal.' Admittedly that was true, but I told her that it still felt like she'd forgotten.

    So anyway, generally the outcome was very good. :slight_smile:
     
  2. Maddy

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2008
    Messages:
    2,633
    Likes Received:
    9
    Location:
    Melbourne, Australia
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    That's fantastic, I'm glad it went well (*hug*)
     
  3. Nj doodle

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2008
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    wow thats an awesome idea! comming out in a letter which u hide hear her underwear hahaha
     
  4. Helen

    Helen Guest

    YAAAAAY LUCY! *dances*

    I knew it would be okay :grin:


    Also, everyone, Lucy also came out to the same close friend that I came out to a while ago, which means that all of her very close friends now know ^___^

    I'm proud of you, Lucyface :slight_smile:
     
  5. Trumpetplyer23

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2008
    Messages:
    533
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    O-H-I-O!
    That's great Lucy! Good job! (!)
     
  6. GlindaRose

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,230
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Haha ohh yes, the other friend, now THAT is 1 funny story!! (Helen do you want to do the honors on this one???)
     
  7. Yay Lucy! (!) Congrats! Gosh, I'd hate to have to come out twice, once is scary enough. I hope she remembers this time. (*hug*)
     
  8. Tim

    Tim
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,474
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    California
    Wow, that's awesome Lucy! :astonished:

    I Wonder if my mom keeps asking about girlfriends for the same reason :confused: Cause she acknowledges I'm gay when I talk about my guy friends, so she hasn't forgotten XD.
     
  9. Mirko

    Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Messages:
    18,870
    Likes Received:
    3,203
    Location:
    Northern Hemisphere
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    That's great Lucy! Congratulations! :slight_smile:
     
  10. panda

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2007
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto,Canada
    Congrats Lucy!!(!)(!):thumbsup:(!)(!):smilewave:smilewave:grin::grin::lol::lol:frowning2:!)(!)
     
  11. yahooooo

    yahooooo Guest

    Hey dude I'm so pleased it went well :grin:

    Congrats about your second coming out lol. Oh and I love the story about your other friend. Reminds me of coming out to one of my mates who ended up being bi. We had practically both told each other about how our parents would react if we came out to them, talked about the L word, talked about what a **** this girl is because she is so homophobic and how we should take her to pride.. and still it took months, years even before either of us were like actually.. in case you haven't guessed :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    I think people are just scared to get it wrong because it is the sort of thing that for some strange reason seems to be a taboo subject. Some people get so uncomfortable about it that it seems safer not to ask.

    Oh well.. it provides amusement to all us queer folk who can laugh at how awkward it makes people! I remember talking to my friend about what was so wrong with being gay.. she totally freaked. It's sad but as I can't see it changing so you might as well take the mick a little and have some fun freaking out homophobic straight people :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Anyway congrats on both counts!!!!!.. I just sort of merged replies for both in this one post to save time/space :grin:
     
  12. beckyg

    beckyg Guest

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2007
    Messages:
    6,656
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    Middle of Oregon
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    That's great Lucy! This is a reminder that parents really don't have the knowledge on how to act around their gay kids. You have to teach them that. Lucy's mom probably had no idea that what she was saying was offensive to her. So yeah, speak up guys if your parents say something that is making you uncomfortable!
     
  13. GlindaRose

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,230
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    ^We should write a book about this. 'A parent's guide to their gay children' lol
     
  14. interstella

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2008
    Messages:
    431
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    London, UK
    Congrats Lucy! Hiding the letter in her underwear drawer is probably the greatest way ever to come out lol.
    :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  15. Tim

    Tim
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,474
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    California
    Haha, maybe you should talk to my mom =P She still makes rude gay jokes and talks about how wrong gay marriage is, and how they're "Stealing her color" -.-
     
  16. ccdd

    ccdd Guest

    Congrats and well done on coming out (again) to your mum - it must have been really frustrating given that you'd already come out to her, but it seems like it was a really good idea that you did - just to give her a heads up that she was upsetting you with her comments.

    Glad it went well :slight_smile:
     
  17. Alexander

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2007
    Messages:
    176
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Red Hook NY
    Tis a great idea.

    Any helpers? :grin:

    congrats love on taking a stand again :slight_smile:
     
  18. Vampyrecat

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2007
    Messages:
    923
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    1 hour east of Portland, Vic.
    awww Luce! That's fantastical! It's stupendous! :slight_smile:
    Have a dancing banana.

    (!)

    Actually, have TWO FANCY !!! dancing bananas for your troubles.
    (!!) (!!)
     
  19. ausdtc

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 12, 2008
    Messages:
    156
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Brisbane, Australia
    Glad it went well :slight_smile: It sounds like your mum is just not sure how she should act, she'll get there in time I imagine!

    Hehe, last night I was talking with my mum and sister about random stuff, and something came up and mum said "...when you get a boyfriend - or girlfriend or whatever...", my sister chipped in with "he can't get another girlfriend, that'll make me all confused and stuff!" :slight_smile:

    The book idea is great, wonder if that's something we could pull off..
     
  20. GlindaRose

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,230
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    ^Lol you have a great sister...