There are 4 characters in this story, besides me. Conor: Soccer player, tall, muscular, long curly dirty blond hair, blue eyes. Brandon: Tall-er, redhead, skinny. Dillon: Short, nice, and barely part of the story. Tyler: Not overweight, just... above normal weight. Also has curly dirty blond hair and blue eyes. So on friday, Conor and Brandon called me, saying that they were outside my house on their bikes, that we were going to ride over to the pool that Tyler lifeguards at to harass him. We rode over there, but on the way we stopped off at Conor's house to get water and whatever because it was 98 degrees out there. After a while, we got there and swam for a while, of course harassing Tyler. Then afterwards Conor, Brandon, and I went back to Conor's house, along with another guy who just invited himself over. We played rock band for a while, until most of them had to leave. I was vocals mostly, at the end, though, I had to take over guitar for Brandon AND sing on the song "Peace of Mind" By Boston. I did it easily, not bragging or anything. So, I spent the night there. Well, it was all going well, coming out was hanging over me the whole time, I felt awful, restless. I couldn't sleep, but I couldn't say it. I was about to cry. In fact, I think I did, quietly. We were in adjacent rooms and there was a fan on in his room. I finally got the courage up to tell him, I knew what I was going to say... okay, here goes. "Conor?" I asked quietly. No response. "Conor?" I repeated, only louder. Then I realized he was asleep. I started crying, burying my face in the pillows. I had finally gotten the courage to do it... and he was asleep. I slowly, reluctantly drifted off to sleep. In the morning, we were playing xbox. The conversation went like this: "Conor?" "Yeah?" "Remember... in biology class, when I told you that I'm not straight?" "Yeah." "You asked me if I was gay." He nodded. "I lied to you." Silence. "So... you are gay?" He asked. I nodded. "Oh... Well... I don't see you any differently, Ryan... It's your decision, and I'm not one to try to change that." "It's not my decision though..." I insisted. He ignored that and changed the subject. ... Well, he was having family over for his brother's birthday, so he was doing chores. They kicked me out. So, I rode my bike over to Tyler's house. Nobody was there, so I rode to Dillon's house. We hung out, watched tv, had lunch, I watched him play GTA4, then I got kicked out of there too, he had a date with his girlfriend. So I went over to Tyler's subdivision pool, because he said he was working then. I called him and he said... "Nope, I lied to you. Are you the only one there?" "Yep." "Oh... well I worked morning shift. I said I worked closing to trick you guys, you were only going to harass me." "Oh... okay." "Look, I'm sorry, I thought it would be funny." "It would have been, it's fine." "You can come on over to my house, I'll unlock the door, just come on in." So I went over there, we ate snacks, played xbox... Then finally at 4:00 in the morning, when we decided to go to bed... I finally got the courage to say... "Tyler... you have no idea how hard this is to say... and believe me, I'm being completely serious here..." "Yeah?" "Would you... think any less of me if I told you that I'm gay...?" "...you really are?" "Yeah." "Really?" "Mhm." "Oh, well...whatever." "It doesn't change anything, right?" "Right." Then he changed the subject. That was this morning. So now I'm basically out... the only people who don't know are my little brother and my dad... and they really don't need to know. I hope this helped some people... and please, any straight people, or people who haven't come out and don't fully get it yet... realize how amazingly hard it was for me to do that. It took me literally forcing myself past what I was comfortable with, controlling my body objectively, almost as if I was in a dream. If I was attached to it, no way I could have done it. So yeah... That's my story. Thanks for reading.
Hey there Suburbian! Congratulations! That sounds absolutely awesome. As someone who just came out to my two best friends a few weeks ago, I know exactly how hard what you did was. Here's how it goes, the three of us were watching a movie and my secret was absolutely eating me alive, just as it had been for the previous six years, literally (we've been best friends for over 10 years). So, after telling them that "I have to admit something to you," they said, "yeah, we know. You're gay." I told them flat out, "yes, I really am. Totally." I was shaking and sweating. The room was silent for about two seconds, and it felt like forever. Then I asked how they knew, and they said I was "the most flamboyant dude we know." Not feminine, just flamboyant gestures and mannerisms. And you want to know what, we have been much closer friends ever since that. They said that they feel a lot m,ore comfortable around me since they know that I am being honest with them. And they are completely cool with it. Sorry to ramble on. I speak from first hand experience - what you did takes courage, and I applaud you for that! Congrats, and now go enjoy your gay life more! Next time we're n touch, I hope you are on your way to finding Mr. Right On a side note, oh man, at 15 you sound just like my life at 18-23. Always playing xbox and making music Rock on dude!
Thank you, thank you! But... I really don't act gay, and a lot of my friends are... they seem anti gay. They're probably talking behind my back, but you know what? I don't care, because I'm not lying to them anymore, and I have a lot of friends that I obtained through hanging out with my older brother (because I'm cooler than him )
Congratulations! Coming out to others is hard. There's no question about it. I am glad that it went well for you.
Congratulations. It gets easier with every person you tell, but it's harder the closer you are to someone. I'm glad they reacted well.
It always brings you closer when you tell someone too. It can actually be to your benefit to tell a new friend that you're gay, it builds trust. Let me know if you want to talk.
Great job! *hugs* I am starting to realize for myself just how hard it is to say it, I admire your courage!