My parents found out

(*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)
There isn't much you can do besides talk to them. You can't ignore your parents (sadly).
(*hug*)

 

(*hug*) Im sorry your having a hard time. Maybe they are just responding in panic because they dont really understand and are scared.
I think its best that you are just honest with them and maybe with a bit of time to think about it they will come around.
I hope it works out for you.

 

Im sorry. But this might be a good oppurtinity to finally be yourself.

Just give it a bit of time, good luck.

(*hug*)

 

Give it a bit of time mate and hopefuly they will be better about it, remember you have your iPod to get on here like me!x ste

 

Oh geez, I'm sorry. I hope they calm down and you can talk some sense into them. (*hug*)

 

(*hug*)(*hug*)
How are they reacting? Panic, denial, anger?
I guess all you can do is try and talk to them and help them realize EC is just here to help.

 

Let them know that this is a support forum. Tell them that we're not some homosexual
recruiting place! You like talking to other people going through what you're going through.
Ask them to read some coming out stories before they decide to cut you off.
Idk...Maybe write down your feelings,in a letter to them. Get some PFLAG material?
Whatever you decide,good luck. We all hope to see you here. We all need each other!

 

Good luck man, just be true to you and don't let yourself get down. This will wash over. No matter what, you know what you are and nothing can change that. Love yourself for them until they come around.

 

id have to agree with mickey here..... let them know that its not a recruiting place, tell them your no different than before, just that now they know.

 

Talk to them and tell them how important this site is as a support latch. Parents should respect their kids right to be happy and know how hard it is to be gay in this world. You just need to talk to them, its not easy but needs to be done.

 

aww I really hope everything goes okay dude. It'll just take them time to adjust to everything because its sorta a shock and a lot of information that they are all of the sudden finding out. I think you should wait like a week for them to cool off and to sort of adjust to what they found out, and then talk to them. I wouldn't try to talk to them like right away because they still havn't like cooled off and fully adjusted to the fact that your gay. Wait a week, and then confront them and tell them like that you've always felt that way and your unique, and that sort of thing. I know this has to be super hard to deal with because its your own family but I think it is better they found out now than later on like when your older, because it is easier dealing with stuff as a kid, which is why i decided to come out to my parents in the first place. Just hang in there dude, and i'm sure your parents will adjust and accept you over time.

 

Oh hun

I'm so sorryy!

That's kinda what happened with me, except for the reacting badly part

Mom took it well.

I'm not usually good at advice that doesn't involve the words "fuck/forget them"
But you can't exactly do thatt

:/
I dunno what to tell you except
Best of wishes(?)




Oh and on a side note
Have anyof yall ever seen those shirts that say "Recruiter" in rainbow?
I saw this lesbian at the mall in one
She had a mullet

 

Im sorry!

My Mom did not re-act well today either, your not alone! Find a way to get here, there are many ways to get around your parents not wanting you on, but its more important to get support now than ever! We are ALL here for you!

 

I think they may be concered, but taking it the wrong way and going overboard about it. But also they may be just not happy about you being Gay, but hopefully that is not the problem so yah just try talking to your parents.

 

Just remember to be yourself through it all and that your parents love you for you, not who you love. Like Prince Zuko said, "My whole life, I struggled to gain my father's love and acceptance. But once I had it, I realized I lost myself getting there. I'd forgotten who I was."

 

In the name of the Reactionary and the Holy Crap! I now pronounce you Knee and Jerk.

Reasons for them to react poorly to the news:

- "OMG the internet is a scary place full of recruiters and pedophiles." Try an approach that involves bringing your parents into the discussion. Bring print materials and offer to go over them together. It might help to explain why the internet was chosen as a medium for support (interactive, global, anonymous) and show why a site like this would not appeal to creepy people (no porn, no full names or other easy ways to stalk people). Also, explain how have you taken additional measures to protect your identity.

"You trust strangers on the internet more than your parents?! How have we failed? Let's get angry to avoid feelings of inadequacy." Assure them that you would have come out to them once you were ready. Explain how taking charge of your own well-being is essential for living independently, as they likely expect you to do once you have reached the age of majority.

- "Being gay involves some kind of lifestyle that is dangerous and we must protect our child from it." Admit and recognize the dangers of bashing and sexually transmitted infections - however! put them into proportion (boring gay people don't make for good news headlines). Explain what is being done to reverse the trends for the gay community in general, and how you can and are avoiding to become another statistic. Also important to make clear that sexual orientation is not a choice, nor can it be changed. Reliable, preferably print materials, to back up your assertions will greatly help your case. Pflag meeting maybe?

- "Being gay is immoral/against our faith/disgusting." Oy! If this is the case, it may take them a long time to reconcile. This is a journey they will have to make largely on their own. Attempts to help them along too vigorously may backfire. Believe in yourself and be a beacon of hope.




It would likely help their thought process to ask them, in an open-ended manner, just what disturbs them. They may not be able to give a clear answer (or even the real answer!) but if they can recognize exactly why they feel the way they do, the emotional can become rational. Outstanding issues will then be easier to resolve.

 

Just talk to them. You are like still very young, and of course they are going to freak out. Because they concern too much about you.

It seems like there is nothing else you can do.

take all of the above advices, really good ones.

 

you're in my thoughts. they might be trying to protect you from online predators, though i hope it has nothing to do with homophobia. if the latter of the two is the case, just be yourself; they can never truly hate you: you're their son.

education helps too. look around your hometown for non-profits promoting educational programs/courses/small classes concerning sexuality. if there aren't any, the state or county might have some information to pass along to your 'rents. Because the Bible Tells Me So is a good movie to share with them. i feel overbearing right now, so i apologize if i am.

good luck.

you're in my thoughts.(*hug*)

 

I don't know exactly how they're reacting, but unless they're impossible to talk to, I would do a whole formal "coming out" as if they hadn't discovered it themselves. I don't think a letter would really work, though it could help you figure out what to say, I think at this point you should talk to them face to face.

Explain exactly what being gay means to you, when you knew, etc. Pretty much what you would have said if you'd come out to them on your own schedule. Give them one of the PFLAG pamphlets and stuff. Maybe a few websites. Tell them you're sure about it, too. I wouldn't mention EC unless they bring it up, at least not at first.

Good luck. it must be tough, can't imagine being in that situation.