Hello from a college freshman! So...I kind of came out to university sometime in September, so this is an old story. It's also about moving to college in general...Buuut let's go: I was so ready to get to college. Living in a predominantly conservative state, where your town (not city) is basically the buckle of the bible belt, it's very, very hard to not just stand on one of the cafeteria tables and just scream your homosexuality to the entire school given all the anti-gay stuff people said (one blockhead in Civics was particularly fond of calling me a faggot...well, guess he was right ). So I was more than happy to graduate, and get to a college in California!!! Of course I had nightmares, but I've always had nightmares before going to school (the basic "what if they hate me, or if I fail a class" nightmare, nothing serious). I particularly chose this college because it was so LGBT friendly (not to mention highly ranked...). I was also nervous. Both my older siblings had gone to very good East coast universities, so I knew something about what to expect. But WOW! Nothing like I was expecting. The first day of orientation week (where all the frosh and transfer students get to know each other/campus), was hectic. I had a complete itinerary planned out (get this thing registered, say hi to that particular research group, socialize). My mom(doesn't know) chased me out of my room because she was very sentimental and wanted to setup my room "one last time." So...off I went to do errands. I came back, and she was telling my roommate (some guy from the West coast) all about how to take care of me (health issues and all...). Imagine how mortified I was :lol:. My roommate and I then proceeded to go say hi to everybody else on the floor. Everybody was so chill (!). The end of the day, we all get an email asking us to do our roommate contracts (agreements with each other so we don't end up tearing each other's throats out). So...my roommate and I did ours. It's kinda blurry now that I try to concentrate on it. I remember discussing food sharing, cleanliness, and other things. Then...came the sexile talk . Sexile (v)-to exile one's roommate while one scoodilypoops with somebody else. My roommate was definitely awkward about this talk, but when else were we going to talk about this? That's right...never again (or at least we thought). So he starts talking, then I start talking, and eventually, we hash it out to each of us being sexiled like...3x a week, with one day nobody being sexiled (I was being very, very generous here...if you do this, say once a week at most, and alternate Fridays [he doesn't do that, just future references]). And he starts talking about girls. :eek:. My demeanor completely changed. While we were talking about sexile, I was pretty easygoing, but the moment the word "girl" popped out of his mouth, I knew. I had to tell him. Shoulders stiffened, back hunched...yeah, I was pretty turtled out. I asked him to take a seat so I could tell him something (and promised not to hurt him, since apparently I look like I can hurt people?). Then... "ILikeGuys," or something to that effect. There's like a millisecond of hesitation (if any), and the guy just beams (not smiles, he beams) and he's like "Dude, thanks for sharing!". OMG, best. roommate. ever. (keep in mind, this talk would have basically been social suicide in my hometown). He reaches out his hand, and I shake it (*hug*). I then proceeded to deal with the adrenaline rush caused by coming out to the first person physically (I had already come out to some old friends who didn't live in my state via Skype...def not the same). Then proceed to tell him exactly how I knew I was gay, and ask him nicely to not mention this to my mom at all ( bad as it sounds, I'd like to go to college without having to pay for loans until senior year). Then it's back to talking about sexiling, etc. where I tell him I'm not planning on losing my virginity anytime soon. So yeah, roommate done...then after my mom leaves, it's basically a whole nother story. I sit at lunch with my roommate and some girls from my dorm, and they're all like "let's set you up with this one girl on our floor! You two would be perfect since you're so similar." :roflmao: My roommate and I look at each other and smile, and I'm like ..."sorry, but...I'm kinda not interested in her that way." The girls are like "what?! But you're perfect for each other:tantrum: " Or something similar to that. Then I tell them that I like guys instead. And one of them is like "You walk with this dignity that straight guys don't have." Cue me being deeply flattered. Another time, I was studying this other guy, and it's late at night, and we're studying chemistry, and (oh god the runons...sorry) he's like "Oh, this guy's super hot" (he had already told me he liked guys), and I'm like "eh, he's not my type". Talk about deer in the headlights moment. Then, the guy's just all smiles (everybody smiles in college...I LOVE IT!), and he's like "YOU'RE GAY?" and I just smile, nod, and after he badgers me (we're both highly not into each other btw), we go back to doing chemistry. I also met my first other gasian. Wow. We were both super surprised to see another person who wasn't...well, not asian at the LGBT mixer. Yup. And I'm no longer the lone gasian. I've found my people. So yeah. I fly back out today after acting straight for almost an entire month. It's honestly felt like I have wings, and they've been tied to my back this entire time, and now I get to release the chains that've been binding them. We'll see what this quarter brings.
