I came out, but it wasn't how I wanted. This is my story, even if it doesn't seem like it in some places, so just read it thoroughly. I HOPE it meets everyone's relevancy standards. After reading back through all of my posts, and some of the drama they inspired, I realized that I needed to get over myself and my anger with myself over not coming out to my family. I tried giving someone advice on coming to America and going to college here, and I got involved in a fight with someone over immigration; I told someone it was ok to tell their therapist that they were gay, and I learned that apparently it's not ok to tell your therapist what's causing your depression; I said I thought most males were "cut" in America and Canada and I got into a debate on providing accurate sources in a debate, in which I was wrong. These made a lot of people angry and very upset, and I was obviously wrong with everything I said and I'm sorry, I was only trying to help and offer my opinion. I went to the doctor today and I had tests done on my heart, and nothing has come back on those tests yet because they're not finished and take a while to process. In the past year I haven't been eating properly, drinking properly, or exercising properly because I was so depressed over not coming out. I had no energy to do what was right for my body. And look at me, I have nothing but a chest full of pain to show for it After reading those posts and coming to the realization that I was acting like a crazy person, I thought to myself, "Look at yourself, you're crazy. You're geting worked up over an internet site and you're depressed because you're afraid to tell people who you really are. When did you decide to let yourself go like that?" So I got my brother and my mom into the foyer and said this, word for word; "I'm Gay. I'm tired of being depressed over it and I want you to both remember that I'm a part of this family and I love you both. I hope this doesn't change anything." I gave them pamphlets I got in the mail today and they're still reading over them, but my mom did say she loved me anyway and that she would always be proud to call herself my mom. I called my dad, who's better now, and told him and his wife that I'm gay, because they need to know too. I said what I said to my mom and brother, and I told them to call me back tomorrow. I sent out messages on myspace telling everyone I know in big bold letters, "I AM GAY." I don't want to call all two hundred people and tell them all personally, so that'll have to do. I posted this because I abused the site, and don't want others to follow in my path, and to give an example of what being depresssed for so long can do to you. I hope you all can come out and be happy again like I'm trying to do right now! I'm not going to be posting anymore because I don't feel like it's appropriate for me to, but good luck everyone!
I admire your courage to come out to everyone. How are your feelings right now? ps. Don't leave. We gonna miss you:icon_sad:
I think I remember something about the "cut vs uncut", it's alright, you gave your opinion, we gave ours. But congrats on coming out !!
Congratulations J4L! It sounds like that went really well. Congratulations too on realising that you are stressed and depressed, and appreciating the cause. I definitely think you did the right thing, and I'm sure you'll start to feel more relaxed and cheerful now. As for that thread, well it's history now. No bad feelings here. (*hug*)
Congratulations are in order for coming out! And I have to agree with everyone else-there's no reason for you to leave. Although the EC is a great community, and we all support it, I hope that everyone here remembers that, despite the awesome vibe this place has, that it still is the internet, so there is occasionally going to be some misinformation, accidental or otherwise, and there's going to be some stupid drama, and sometimes there will be some great material, and sometimes there will be some awesome posts, whereas other times, there might not be any posts of interest. That's the cruel and unfortunate nature of the internet. So, although we here at EC are, in my view, several cuts above the norm and an awesome community, stuff will, unfortunately, still happen. We, however, will forgive and forget, unlike most of the interweb.
I hope you read it befre you leave( BUT WE DONT WANT YOU TO LEAVE):icon_sad: First of all i want to congatulate you for your coming out, you have done an awesome job taht I dont even think I can doo ( maybe someday) And Jersey, I want to remind you that this is a teen forum, so we are still learning lots of things. There are many things we dont know, but we want to give and share our advices and opinions. So it is not wrong whwn you say something and it is wrong. It is natural. We come here together as a family to help each other out, not to show how smart you are. Yet there are some people who make you feel bad, who denied all your opinions, like a debate you said, that dosent mean that you will let them hurt you. You dont have to be sorry, you have to be proud of yourself because you are willing to help people... I dont know what else to say, but I'm sure we will be really happy if you stay, because we know that you are a great person...(*hug*)
You are 17. Sounds like you said things you now regret. That's okay. We all do it. Live and learn! Leaving sounds like the easy way out to me - from experience. This is suppose to be a place of acceptance - and I have to believe that acceptance will still be there when we screw up. I am bound to say something stupid or disrespectful or naive, but I hope I shouldn't feel like I need to leave because of it.
