So while I'm not entirely sure where I stand, I've at least gotten to the point where I can't tell people I'm straight without feeling like an ass for lying. The thing is, my brother is gay. And told me so, a little over a year ago, I think. And all this time, I've been feeling bad that he trusted me enough to tell me, and here I was feeling like I couldn't utter a peep to him. I kind of felt like I had to be 100% sure before I even talked to him, but the other night he showed me that this was a pretty silly thing to do! My best friend was over, and I think a few comments I, er, might have made regarding the hotness that is Vermillion Lies prompted this, haha. "Yeah, [something we were talking about] is something you'll understand when you get a boyfriend. Or girlfriend, whatever you want. ... What do you want?" "I don't knowwww." "Well, hey, it's all cool. You just gotta date around, figure out who you like, you know?" And then my brother walked in the room and we were all watching Margaret Cho on youtube, and launched into a wee discussion. I... might have been a little tipsy at the time, so I don't remember exactly what led up to it, but I do remember blurting out, "HAHA HI, I LIKE CHICKS." LOUDLY. Haha I'm smooth. Brother sez, "Wait, are you being serious?" "... Yeah. I mean, I'm not totally sure, uh, who I actually prefer. I mean I find some guys attractive and all but I think I might like ladies more...?" "Whoa, how long has this been going on?" "It sorta blindsided me freshman year of college. I had a ridiculous awkward crush on a TA and I could barely talk to her and I had no idea what was going on, and I've been noticing way more women than men on campus, and now I've been just wondering for over three years and it's been driving me nuts..." "Jeeze, you should tell me these things!" So we had a nice little heart to heart where I sat and gibbered at him, and I got a hug. It really helps having someone in my own family who's already been there, holy crap. So mebbe it's not quite as, I dunno, official as saying what I am one way or the other, but oh my god. Two very important people to me at least know what's going on, and they're awesome about it, and it makes me feel a hell of a lot better. ... Boy, I think my parents may have a few surprises coming. >.>
Your brother sounds really awesome. It's okay to be confused. It happens to the best of us. There's no mad rush to decide your sexuality. It'll happen,eventually. It is great that you have your brother and your friend to talk to. It sure helps.
Of course it counts! Congrats! It's great that you have someone in the family with whom you can talk about things. I'm sure his perspective and insights will help you to figure things out.
your brother seems cool and its ok to be confused about who you like. i think we are all a bit confused at some point
Haha, I can see it now. "Mom, dad! Two of your kids like women, one likes men, GUESS WHO'S WHO " But yeah, this has been a great thing for me and my brother. We were pretty close before but now it's like, hey, we're comrades of a sort! I can't believe I kept quiet for so long around him, it feels good.
