1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

3rd Successful Coming Out, 1st Family Member

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by SailingKoala, Apr 22, 2009.

  1. SailingKoala

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2009
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oxford
    So I have been Hinting to my sister that I am gay for about a month now, today she got my mad at her by calling me a mummies boy on facebook and I nearly came out to her in a fit of range - started to post here to get some advice and calmed down enough not to need it so I never posted. This evening I was chatting to her and the friend I first came out to online and everything just seemed to fit timing wise.....

    Me - If I said I had something to tell you, how open minded are you?
    And what might you think it was?
    Sis - i am very open minded any of my old friends and new one will tel you
    and whats more i can keep things private if need . so its up to you if you wish to
    open up to me .
    Me - The Flairs should off told you but, this one says it.... Will answer questions...
    No Mother doesn't know No she can't know yet, please don't call me tonight just
    email message I will call tomorrow Or you visit and we can walk and talk.
    OK keep this private from family otherwise I don't care who you need to tell or talk
    to (OK didn't tell her then but sent her a flair that said I am Gay)
    Me - If you still not sure what I'm struggling to tell you is ..........I am Gay
    (Then Decide just need to say it)
    Sis - pete well youve put my mind at ease ive been wondering if you were for a while
    and yes im fine with it and i truely understand why you wouldnt yet want to tell
    mum or dad . we should meet up to talk as there are i few things i ve always
    wanted to talk to you about but didnt know if i could trust you not to go to mum .
    how about tomorrow.



    What I would like to know as everyone I have come Out to has been thinking I was - Why was I the last to accept myself - why didn't they ever confront me!!

    I am relieved at the moment not sure if I believe she can keep herself from telling Our Mother and not fully lookin forward to seeing her tomorrow - but It is one less person I am hiding from.
     
  2. BasketCase

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2009
    Messages:
    331
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Northern Ireland
    I can relate to the confusion over why no-one has ever 'confronted' you. I wonder the same thing myself. You've done the right thing in telling her though, even if she doesnt keep it to herself, it was a brave thing to do.
     
  3. Just Adam

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2009
    Messages:
    4,435
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    My AV room
    great come out... im just interested what she has to tell u thats so secret now ... maybe she likes the ladys lol

    hope it all goes well :slight_smile:
     
  4. Greggers

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2008
    Messages:
    2,698
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    BC, Canada
    People just DONT confront others if they think they are gay. I dont know why, its like a law of nature. I got the same thing from my brother and sister "We always thought so" type of thing. I guess its just taboo to confront people about it. Ive heard it time and time again the same thing.
     
  5. EM68

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2008
    Messages:
    3,265
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Stoughton, Massachusetts USA
    Congrats on telling your sister. Sometimes its more evident to others that one is gay before they realize it themselves.
     
  6. SailingKoala

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2009
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oxford
    Yeah I have a strange feeling that she might be!! ( Not sure what to think if she was... not that it would be bad just a little freaky and would defo mean I have to come out to parents first) I will find out Tomorrow, I will also get a better feeling of, if I can really trust Her... I am just glad my friend was chatting to me and talking me through everything as I came out to my sis otherwise it would never of happened.
     
  7. Just Adam

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2009
    Messages:
    4,435
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    My AV room
    you should be able to trust her shes your sis and if she is the same position she should be able to understand kinda how you feel... and you can support each other
     
  8. Thisisnew

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2009
    Messages:
    654
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NY
    Congrats I hope you have a good talk with your sister.
     
  9. Mickey

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2008
    Messages:
    1,669
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    Good for you! You're a brave soul! I think you can trust her. She has a secret,too,and that helps. Please,let us know. I'm dying to find out what she has to tell you!
     
  10. Coldflame

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    48
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Calgary
    Hey now, I don't think we have any right to pry into other peoples lives like that. I am kind of dying to know myself though...:icon_wink

    As for not being confronted, there are probably a lot of reasons why. First of all, if you were 100% straight, what do you think it would do to your ego if everyone started asking you if you were gay? That would probably put a lot of pressure and stress on you. Besides, I think it would be pretty awkward for someone to try and get you to come out of the closet if you were never in it in the first place.

    I think a lot of people say that also just to make themselves feel a bit better. It's hard to explain but I think it's just one of those weird psychological things people do to themselves. :confused:
    My mom was absolutely shocked when I told her. She kept saying "I had no idea" ect. about 4 hours later, she kept saying "you know, I always kind of had an idea. Even when you were a kid..." :dry:
     
  11. SailingKoala

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2009
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oxford
    Well, The end of a Long Day, My sister is just leaving to go back home now, it has been a long tiring Day not really tiring mentally, but very much physically - I feel my comfortable chatting away while I do something so we went for a long walk along the coast today I left the house at 9am and we didn't get back until 4pm - damn my calves ache. Anyway left my Sis to get her train with our Mum - first test to see if she can keep a secret I think. She says she will keep it quiet but I am not convinced she will. Her Big secret is something that I can't really bring out in public at all - but if it is true and not just another one of her stories then OMG.... No she isn't Lesbian. Yeah as you can probably tell I have alot of respect and trust in my sister (include Sarcasm as you read) - but going on past history then it is all deserved.
     
  12. tallship

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    Messages:
    114
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    London
    yeah good for you , glad you kept your sisters confidence , yep it works both ways but now we are are dying to know the secret and you cant tell arrg , take care(*hug*)
     
  13. Just Adam

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2009
    Messages:
    4,435
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    My AV room
    hmm im going for engaged pregnant or page 3 girl lol

    hehe :grin:

    anyway welldone on chatting to your sis allthough i dont think the walking would help me in that situation id get tired achey and angsty lol but hey if it works :grin: ... i hope she holds her tounge for you... if you get a phone call from your mum tomorrow out of the blue well :S

    but hard works done take a rest and look after yourself :slight_smile:
     
  14. Magnet

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2009
    Messages:
    682
    Likes Received:
    0
    Congratulations on telling your sister :slight_smile: