I'm not sure if this is the right thread to post this in, but some of you may remember me from a couple of months ago. I was dealing with a girlfriend of a year at the time, but just wanted to let everyone know I finally broke things off with her, and put her out of my life forever. HOORAY. And as of a couple nights ago, I finally came out to one person that i'm gay or bisexual.. that's undecided. But bi as of right now considering I've never been with a guy. But anyway. She was happy, she joked on me a little, but I didn't mind that. I guess it was easier for me to tell her because she's bi herself, and she's out to everyone. So basically I figured I'm gonna come out to my friends this week (hopefully), and then slowly work my way up the family chain. Probably tell my sister and my mom eventually, but I don't know about telling my dad. I'm not sure how he'll handle it since he rags on gay people all the time. But yeah.. sorry I haven't posted anything in a while. Kinda forgot the URL and stuff :x. Anyone wanna input their advice? Or tell me a snippet of their coming out?
Only you are going to know when the right time/way to come out is, you could plan every last detail of the come out and then at the last second just decide to go unscripted. Some people on this site have written letters to the people that they wanted to come out to, mostly so they wouldn't get sidetracked or go off on a tangent. Like I said at the begging though you will know when it is the right time. Good luck and lets us know how it goes.
Got same situation here. My dad doesnt approve of me not being straight 150%. My mom's lenient though and two of my brothers often tease me. Well your dad should be glad that youre bi not a criminal.
First, let me say hello, and I'm proud of you. :eusa_clap Second, you can come out whenever you feel most comfortable. You don't have to feel like "Ok, I told her, maybe this week I'll tell so and so, and then the week after I'll work my way up to my sister", naw, it all comes so naturally, do it when you feel it's best. And you say you don't know because your dad "rags" on gay people all the time? You will NEVER know how somebody will react. My parents both acted opposite of how I thought. My mom has gay friends, loves this one gay author, asked me how I would feel if my dad was gay and got married to a guy because her gay co-worker was getting married and his son was coming to visit, she told me not to treat gays differently before I came out to her, and when I did, she cried and said I hurt her and was gonna kill my grandfather. What the fuck? lol. And my dad was always the one to talk about gay guys. One night me and my brother were watching The Real World Las Vegas, and Alton, who was having sex with different girls in AND out of the house, had to wear angel wings for their job. He complained about it. He didn't want the angel wings. Even after that, my dad called him a fag and a fairy and all that shit, and randomly called people faggots and shit. When he found out, he said it was the worst day of his life, then the next moment shrugged his shoulders and got over it and said nothin he can do and he'd only talk about it if I wanted to. Next day, he acted as if we never even talked about it. So yeah. Do your thing boy.
Congrats on coming out, especially to yourself. It gets easier telling people, I was freaking out at first. But, like some others have said, you have to decide when the time is right to tell people, there is no rush.
Okay, so I didn't manage to come out to my friends this week. Especially my best friend. I just couldn't do it. You guys are right, I need to do it when I feel right. I mean.. I wanna come out, i'm so tired of feeling like I should have to hide it (which I shouldn't), but I just don't think I can do it yet. I accept it myself. Yes. I'm bi, or gay, whichever, I don't really mind. I knew this would be something hard to do though!
well I am sure you will come out to them eventually. If you believe you cant do it face to face ever then perhaps a text message or email would help. Thats what I did, but some others say that face to face can be better. Just do whats right for you.
I think that when you do feel comfortable enough to do it, don't be afraid of their reactions at all. If they truly are your friends, and truly do care about you, it's something that may or may not take time to them, but they'll want to work through it regardless.
I have claps and congrats. HHHOOORRAAAYYYYYyyyyyyy. And good luck on everyone else in your life. It's gonna be tough but it sounds like with your mind set that things will get done. You just got to let them happen as they happen and not rush things
