well. the deed is done. i just told my best friend jessica tonight. we were hanging out all day, we got chinese and ate it at the park, we were driving around waiting for our movie to start that we were going to see. the movie, by the way, was "I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry" sortof an awkward movie to be seeing the day i was planning on coming out i know. but whatever. i did it. so i put it off all day. it was all i was thinking about. and i kept thinking, if i dont do this today, im gonna be so mad at myself again. so my last chance was when i dropped jessica off at her house. i was about to chicken out, and jessica got out and got her stuff from the backseat. i was like "jessica". and she said what. and i was like... "i have something to tell you" she was like... "what" and i was like.. "uhhh nevermind" she kept saying "if you dont tell me its gonna bug me all night" and "just tell me please" and i kept saying "nevermind" she finnaly said "ill get back in the car and then you'll tell me" i felt like i was gonna cry, and i kept biting my lip. it was very uncomfortable to say the least. i couldnt get myself to say it. so i pulled out my phone. and i put up send text message. and i wrote "im gay" on the text and handed her the phone. she said she was glad i told her and gave me a hug. then i drove home. not very well i might add. lets just say my mind wasnt on the road and half the time i was on the wrong side of it. so i turned up the music real loud and sang in the car all the way home. heh. jessica called two times on my way home but i didnt hear it. and when i called her back her phone was shut off and she must have went to bed. so i didnt really get to talk to her all that much at all. and the thing is... im not feeling the whole high thing that everyone talks about where you feel on top of the world after you come out to someone. i kinda feel like shit... but oh well. im one step closer to finally being out. and thats what matters. hopefully ill talk to jess tommorow. and i can talk to her more about it and i can feel better about it. im just not sure how i feel right now.
congratulations! and that kinda happened to me once... I didn't feel very happy after i came out to someone, but knowing i did it made me proud. and you should be too!
My tears came out when i read to the part where she hugged you when knowing you were gay congratulations
Mrrolemodel, It sounds like everything went just fine. Just think from now on you can be yourself with your friend. I think it was such a big moment for you that you both didn't really have time to talk about things before you said goodnight. I'm sure you'll have lots of opportunity and you'll feel better about it all. I am proud of you!!
i talked to jessica again today. she asked kindof a weird question. she was like "what kind of gay did you mean? did you mean gay like feminine? or gay like you like guys" i really didnt get it. heh. but whatever. she seems like shes just trying to help and be supportive. so its going good. but i still dont feel any better.
mrrolemodel, I am very proud of you man for finally coming out to your best friend, Jessica. You must feel better that you got that weight off your shoulders and knowing Jessica is still your friend. Well Done!
Congratz on coming out! I know how hard it is in person! But you should also feel happy that she can ask you questions because it means she is more comfortable with it!! But either way, now you can be yourself around her! YAY(!)(!)
Congratulations! :eusa_clap Well done must've taken lots of courage. It reminds me of how I felt after my very first coming out (at my first session of therapy - I'd made up my mind to finally "deal with it"). Anyway I was rigid (all over) my palms were sweaty and itchy and I felt like I had a cricket ball lodged in my throat ( not that I would know what a cricket ball lodged in my throat - or for that matter anything remotely as large would feel like ). I managed to croak it out to the poor guy who I'd never met before and I was the verge of tears - and that was just the warm up to telling my missus. It still feels surreal to me and yeah, I'm also still waiting for the "high" :eusa_doh: - and I'm not holding my breath either!
congrats! well, i felt that way when i told my best friends. but now that i'm almost completely out, i feel great! maybe it'll happen to you!^^
I don't know how I missed this thread when you first posted, but a belated congratulations are definitely due. Don't worry about not getting the "high" thing - we don't all get that. Quite often the apprehension about whether the person will still accept you, still be friends, etc suppresses that. When she turns out to be fine with it, which I'm sure she will over a bit of time you'll feel the relief that that's one person done and all is good.
