9 year old Brother

He's at an age where he probably wouldn't understand that society thinks there is something wrong with being gay. Abstract thought typically starts at around age 12 along with puberty.

 

I haven't got any experiences with coming out to people that are younger than me.

But I think you should tell him. You probably shouldn't go into details with being gay, just say that you like boys better than girls.

Hope you decide to tell him, but if you don't it's fine too

Good luck, if you do decide to tell him :icon_bigg

 

If you do decide to tell him, keep it simple without any details. Something he would definitely be able to understand. Since he is your brother, I would consider telling him. Especially if you plan on having a serious relationship with someone.

 

I would hope your parents could help out a bit here. 9 is a pretty tender age, and he isn't likely to know much I would imagine. Depending on what he knows, i would imagine a simple, "hey bro, you know some boys like girls, some girls like girls and some boys like boys? well, I like boys, and john is my boyfriend" No need to get too far involved in it i wouldnt think. Or maybe he really doesn't need to know at all at this stage. (sounds like you need to get it off your chest though) I think discussing it with your parents is the best initial plan of action though.

 

I first found out what gay was when I was 10, and my first thought was "What's wrong with that?". I think you should tell him.

 

Children are smarter than they seem. They are sponges and take things in at a rapid rate. Keep it simple so he will understand. In other words if your brother was coming out to you at age 9, how would he say it?

 

My sister's nearly 8. I want her to know that there's nothing wrong with being gay before she goes to high school and gets hit with all the "that's so gay" stuff and starts thinking its a bad thing.

But when she asked, about last year, my mum told her it meant happy ¬¬ Now she wont beleive that a girl can love another girl or a boy love a boy.

 

i would wait maybe cuz all brother want to be like there big brother soooo if you tell him you are gay he may think he is gay too

 

You know him best.

I would wait till age 10, or when the moment is right. But you don't have to tell him.

 

Go ahead and tell him. At 9 he likely understands what gay means already (my daughter did at 8) and he'll be fine with it (she was). At that age they are very aware of people having boyfriends and girlfriends - they talk about it in kindergarten now. So I think you could tell him.

As what others have said though - I think your parents should be made aware of the fact that you're going to tell him.

You might also want to tell him that it isn't a secret that he needs to keep - nor is it something that he has to talk about. He's entitled to his privacy and if he doesn't want to tell his friends that his brother (you) is gay, then he doesn't have to.

 

They talk about that stuff in kindy these days? yikes! I would imagine it depends on coutry a fair bit too, but wow, that kind of blows my mind. In a good way I suppose, I just can't imagine it myself being my age. Though its a great way to stop homophobia when kids find out at an early age that same sex attraction is normal.

 

Well, I was told when I was really young that "your aunty lives with another woman and loves her very much".

SO basically... I grew up thinking that there was nothing wrong with gay people. Of course, at puberty I became wary of it and the stigmas, bit soon got over that. I think it would be good to tell him, but it's not necessary to just randomly tell him - wait until an opportunity presents itself where you can explain nicely to him. If he sees you with your guy, you can just explain to him that you care a lot about him and that you're dating. I'm sure he'll be okay with it.

 

I was referring more to the concept of boys having girlfriends and girls having boyfriends. Not necessarily same sex relationships. But they'll understand the concept of boyfriend / boyfriend if it's explained to them because they understand boyfriend / girlfriend.

 

There is nothing wrong with explaininng to your brother that you are gay and dating, especially if your boyfriend is going visit your family...at that age they are aware of the dating concept and would accept it. My neice is 9 and she asks her mom about same sex relationships, kids hear things, they don't live in a vacuum. I will be visiting her over the Christmas with my girlfriend so I will tell her about my relationship too, obviously in a way that she understands.

good luck if you decide to tell him

 

Depending on how mature he is, how much tv hes watched or whats been going on at school he probably does know.

My little cousin that I think is 9 said something about my sexuality the other day... I can't remember what he said but it was fucking funny coming from a kid lol.

 

i agree with everyone else^

 

My niece and nephew are 6 and 7 years old and they know what gay is. I wish they didn't think being gay was bad though. I think ther dad taught them that though cuz he seems like he would. For ex: they were playing with a ball when my nephew said "if you touch the ball, you're gay!". I just sat there, wishing I was strong enough to teach them not to say stuff like that but knowing them, they would target me and call me gay and tease me which I couldn't handle(even though they don't know I really am gay!). Lol I like to think things through before I do them...

 

My brother was 10 when I told him about me being gay. He took it well and he understood what it meant. But funnily enough he told me that I should tell mom.

 

It really does depend on maturity and his understanding of the world. I know some kids who are 6-7 that would understand what being gay meant but at the same time i know some that are 11-12 that would just be completely confused.