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The Day Started With a Text...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Gaetan, Jan 15, 2010.

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  1. Gaetan

    Gaetan
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    So, first, a bit of background about some of the people involved in this. I have a female friend, E, who I've known since high school. We worked together for a few years over the summers. She started attending the same university as I did in a graduate program this last fall.

    Second involved is my friend R. He was the second person I came out to, and is in the same graduate program as E.


    Now, the story:
    I received a text from E saying that R had asked if I had told her my news yet. She, of course, didn't know what "news" there was, but R just smiled. So, there she was, asking me what this news was. I barely hesitated in writing my reply in which I came out to her. She had no issues at all with it, and we continued to text for a bit until my mother was finally ready to go to town.

    So...today's plan actually did include me coming out to my mom. We had several errands to run together, and we planned to go out to lunch at the end of it. It was my plan to come out to her while at lunch. I had the feeling I was going to chicken out, but my text from E made me determined to just get it over with.

    ...A chance came earlier than I anticipated. On the way in, my mom was talking about how some people we knew were getting married. After that, she asked me, "So when are you going to get married?" Good thing I was on a straight road our we'd be in the ditch.

    I mumbled, "Dunno," under my breath. Then I said, with as much confidence as I could muster, "I've been meaning to tell you for awhile now, but I'm gay."

    Her reaction was one of mild surprise; she had wondered if I was in the past. She was perfectly fine with it, as I knew she would be. She asked me the standard questions of if I was sure, how long I've known, if I was seeing anyone, and who else I'd told. We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about it and how different members of the family will react.

    It really went as smoothly as can be. And, of course, I was more stressed about it than necessary. Still...a very good day! (!)
     
    #1 Gaetan, Jan 15, 2010
  2. Camman3

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    (*hug*)!!
     
    #2 Camman3, Jan 15, 2010
  3. wizdrorcal

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    How exciting!! Way to go!! Keep that spirit alive as you continue to tell more and more. It gets easier by each person you tell!!
     
    #3 wizdrorcal, Jan 15, 2010
  4. Filip

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    Congratulations! That is pretty awesome!:eusa_clap Especially if it went so well! Coming out to the first family member is always the hardest. It only becomes easier after this.

    So, I take it there's an action plan to tell the rest of the family too, now? Not that I'm trying to pressure you here... :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #4 Filip, Jan 15, 2010
  5. Zach

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    You have to feel pretty good now that your mom knows and she seems to be ok with it. :icon_bigg I'm way older than you are, but I remember when I was about your age my mom would find a girl who worked where she worked, and try to match me up with the girl. (my mom thought we'd make some pretty cute grand children between us) After a couple of attempts of my mom playing match maker, and me not being too interested in who she would have liked to be her daughter-in-law she gave up trying to pick my "mate". Later on she actually flat out asked me if I was "gay" :eek: I was caught off guard, and being a bit of a smart ass, and not thinking about what I was about to say ... I just kinda blurted out "no, I'm not gay .... but my boyfriend is" :eek::eek: She just smiled and hugged me and told me she had always suspected I was gay, and she was ok with it. Moms can suprise you :icon_wink
     
    #5 Zach, Jan 15, 2010
  6. Ander Blue

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    Congratulations J.!!!! I'm so happy that your mom is all good with it :grin:
     
    #6 Ander Blue, Jan 15, 2010
  7. RaeofLite

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    (*hug*) That's awesome. I think in the case when the mother or father highly suspects they have time to sort've deal with it themselves before the child comes out, which in your situation, seems to be the case.

    Awesome. Have a great weekend Gaetan! :slight_smile:
     
    #7 RaeofLite, Jan 15, 2010
  8. endless poetry

    endless poetry
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    =D I'm so happy for you, J =D !
     
    #8 endless poetry, Jan 15, 2010
  9. crazydude

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    thats awesome! congrats!
     
    #9 crazydude, Jan 15, 2010
  10. backtothekitchen

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    Aww, Gaetan, that's great! Congrats! (*hug*)
     
    #10 backtothekitchen, Jan 15, 2010
  11. Mirko

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    Awesome! Congratulations on coming out to your mum! Glad it went so well! :slight_smile:
     
    #11 Mirko, Jan 15, 2010
  12. Mickey

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    As I often say,I LOVE a good coming out story! Congratulations to both you and your mom!
     
    #12 Mickey, Jan 15, 2010
  13. Eleanor Rigby

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    Wonderful ! Congratulations for coming out to your mother and your friends. I'm happy everything went well so far.
    (*hug*)(*hug*)
     
    #13 Eleanor Rigby, Jan 16, 2010
  14. seadog

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    Way to go, you stud! Love conquers all, again!
     
    #14 seadog, Jan 16, 2010
  15. seadog

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    Waaaayyyyyyyy toooo funny. what a great line!
     
    #15 seadog, Jan 16, 2010
  16. Sylver

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    This is a HUGE step in your life - congrats! I hope this is the beginning of a great new and open relationship with your mother!

    It's always interesting to hear what motivation each person has for actually doing it right at that moment. I think that's the hardest part, no matter how much you prepare in advance. It's great that someone else's positive reaction pushed you to get this over with.
     
    #16 Sylver, Jan 16, 2010
  17. zzzero

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    Damn I wish I had that kind of confidence... My parents have given plenty of opportunities but I always get nervous and think it's not a good time and just mumble some answer and move on.
     
    #17 zzzero, Jan 16, 2010
  18. Gaetan

    Gaetan
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    Thank you for the responses everyone! :grin:

    I'll just tack on this one here at the end:
    I told my father this afternoon. We went for a walk together (well, the dog took us for a walk) and I told him during that.

    His reaction was pretty much what I expected, and identical to my mom's. I'm not sure if he understands that it's not a choice, but that doesn't worry me any at all.
     
    #18 Gaetan, Jan 16, 2010
  19. Zume

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    Grats! :eusa_clap
     
    #19 Zume, Jan 16, 2010
  20. Jim1454

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    Wow!!! That's a HUGE day! Telling your mom and dad. That's AWESOME!!! Congrats!
     
    #20 Jim1454, Jan 16, 2010
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