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An inspiring part of my coming-out story

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Mogget, Mar 23, 2010.

  1. Mogget

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    Thought I'd share a somewhat old part of my coming-out story since A) I need cheering up and this part of my story is cheering and B) it says quite a lot about either my friend or (I hope) a change in our overall culture.

    So, my best friend in high school was, in many ways, my ideological opposite. A Lutheran (from a relatively strict branch of that church) conservative to my atheist liberal/borderline socialist. We bonded over a shared love of books, jokes, and mutual trust and respect. On the rare occasions when homosexuality came up, he expressed disgust at the idea of being with a man himself, but I had no idea what his thoughts were on the subject. We grew somewhat apart after graduating, but still remained close friends.

    In any case, I held out coming out for a long time because I was scared he'd reject me, and because I knew that our friendship meant that I couldn't fairly come out to everyone without telling him first. He was just too important (apart from my family, I only felt that way about one other person, and since she's bi I wasn't too worried).

    Finally, I decided that I had to tell him. Being gay was something that wasn't just academic; I had a boyfriend. Even if I couldn't tell my friend about him (he was closeted and I had perhaps too much respect for that), I knew that someday I'd be in a relationship that wasn't, and that my friend deserved to know.

    So, I told. And he was totally okay. Said that if I was happy, that was all that mattered. I was one of his best friends, and that nothing could change that. :icon_bigg

    After that, I didn't care if anyone else rejected me for being gay. If I had his support, anyone wasn't fine with who I was wasn't someone I needed in my life. Other events made me end up not coming out to a lot of people for a long time, but after that, the fear that had gripped me was gone.
     
  2. RaeofLite

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    That's awesome to hear. :slight_smile: I'm happy for you. But also, just note that if your friends don't accept you for you, then they're not friend material to begin with.
     
  3. SaturdaySaviour

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    Now that's what I call a good friend. Congrats (*hug*)
     
  4. padre411

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    I'm sorry you're stuck and need cheering up. I'm so glad your friendship survived your coming out. He sounds like a keeper.

    Peace,
     
  5. Sylver

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    That's a beautiful story! That's pretty much how my best friend reacted - the very first person I came out to. I was nervous as hell at the time but in hindsight I had no reason to be worried. Very good friends will look past things like this regardless of their own personal opinions, and some might even be willing to change their opinions.

    And doesn't it feel great to come out to someone, and then to have them say that you're one of their best friends and nothing will change that? This would be a good indication that you have a true friend here!
     
  6. Alex19

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    kudos! ur friend is awesome!