Funny responses you got when you came out - Page 42 - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender people coming out

16th Jul 2012, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zzzzzz13

My best mate had to be one of the funniest

Me - so well ummm i think im bi
Him - WIN
Me - what?
Him - sooooooo since im ur best friend, can i watch and if im not there can you take pictures?
Me - u douche
Him - no worries i still love you, i would love you more if you rethought my offer

He is a funny bean

lol thats hillarious

RachyAnn · 16th Jul 2012, 01:31 PM

A conversation with my sister and I (she already knows about the girl im dating)

my sis: so, have you kissed her?

me: yes

sis: EW!

me: not ew...amazing(:

sis: no, pretty gross

I run to the kitchen where my mom is and yell "MOOOM, (sister) IS MAKING FUN OF MY SEXUALITY!!!"

mom: what?!??

me: uhhh..

sis: yeah, she has a girlfriend

mom: oh, who?

me: (girlfriend)

sis: you know the REEALLY hyper one, like worse than (my friend) hyper

mom: oh, hunny you need to get a new girlfriend
~~~~
A couple weeks later my sis and I are talking about about my girlfriend, my mom hears something and says "What?"

me: just talking about (girlfriend) and how how her dad is being stupid and not letting us be together and stuff

mom: oh, I thought you guys were kidding

babyjax13 · 16th Jul 2012, 10:33 PM

Me: blah blah blah blah blah....blah blah blah....I'm gay.
My Mom: OH. Well, you know that doesn't change anything right?
Me: Yah.
Mom: Will you still walk the dogs?

Haha! But we did have a deep discussion, thanks for all the help guys - now I just gotsta tell a few more people!

Sayu · 17th Jul 2012, 03:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by babyjax13

Me: blah blah blah blah blah....blah blah blah....I'm gay.
My Mom: OH. Well, you know that doesn't change anything right?
Me: Yah.
Mom: Will you still walk the dogs?

Hana Solo · 18th Jul 2012, 05:12 AM

My mtf girlfriend came out to her best friend- his response was to tell her to get big boobs when she got the surgery so that she could manipulate men with her cleavage. I nearly died laughing when she told me.

---------- Post added 18th Jul 2012 at 10:16 PM ----------

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alphabets

Me: It's something about my sexuality.......

Her: Did you lose it?!?!?!?!?

DraculasSister · 19th Jul 2012, 11:14 AM

My best friend said, "Now I can judge more people who date you" haha

Raindrop · 19th Jul 2012, 08:31 PM

Me - Never have I ever dated a boy.
Friend - So you've dated a girl.
Me - Um yeah, actually.
Friend - Don't fucked with me. Seriously?
Me - Seriously.
Friend - Cool.

andersonh09 · 20th Jul 2012, 06:07 PM

friend "Don't you think Miggs is hot?"
Me "well uh... FYI, I'm a lesbian."
Friend "you can still appreciate a guys' good looks."
Me "True, ya, he's pretty good looking. But I like Hannah better."

secretgirlX · 20th Jul 2012, 07:49 PM

During Truth or Dare -
Guy : "If you were a lesbian, which girl here would you fuck?"
Me : "Well I am bisexual..."
Bunch of other people : "Really?! That's so cool!"
Girl : "Oh come on, I know it'd be me!"
Me : "Yeah... I'm not gonna lie, it'd definitely be you!"

Superlife · 25th Jul 2012, 12:46 PM

Me: I'm gay...
Friend: so if I rub my boobs in your face you won't get a boner?!
Me: urm...no.
Friend: fuck...I thought you were just a bit camp.

Smilodon · 29th Jul 2012, 07:10 PM

I told one of my best friends last night... (It took me an hour and a half. xD)
She was fine with it!

It wasn't until she started asking questions that it got funny.

E: So, basically, you think you're a guy in a girl's body?
Me: Yeah, that's pretty much how it works...
E: No wonder you didn't want to buy a dress...

LSunday · 30th Jul 2012, 07:53 AM

*after a very long, personal discussion with my dad*
Him: So... Who's cute?

This is extra amusing because he teaches at my school, and thus knows every guy in the Senior and Junior class...

Cloudbreaker · 30th Jul 2012, 04:45 PM

This isn't really a response, but I thought it was amusing. This is how I came out to my two younger sisters.

Me: "So you know how sometimes girls use the phrase 'How come all the nice guys are either taken or gay?' Well... I'm not taken."

CTJ · 31st Jul 2012, 12:29 PM

I've only really come out to two people, and i came out to both at the same time when i was really drunk. At this point i'd drank a bottle of Jagermeister and was almost done with a bottle of wine and i just turned round and said:
me: we've known each other for a while now
girl:.....yeah
guy:...
me: i feel like i should really be honest with you
girl: SECRETS!
(i normally avoid telling anyone anything about myself)
guy: oh fucking hell...im gonna get a drink
*walks out* (i think he knew what was coming, i've known him for since i was 11)
Me: Thing is...im gay
girl: fuck off
Me: yeah, its true
*guy walks in*
guy: what i miss?
me: im gay
guy:....ok
girl: really? is that why when i said i had a thing for you you turned me down?! i spent an hour crying over that!
me: yeah, sorry
Girl: oh well
Me: is that it?
girl: what? you expect some sort of big deal?
me: well, yeah, kinda
guy: sucks to be you

It wasnt until much later that i found out neither of them really believed me, because apparently earlier in the night i had claimed i could be an actor and they laughed at me telling me i couldnt lie for shit. They thought i'd made it all up to prove i could act, it wasnt until they added everything up that they realised i was telling the truth

---------- Post added 31st Jul 2012 at 11:33 AM ----------

I thought i'd add this one, not really coming out but a funny remark anyway.

Me and the two i'd come out to were heading towards a restaurant. It had just finished raining and a double rainbow appeared
Girl: Oh! Pretty! A double rainbow!
Me: Thats weird, i feel drawn to the rainbow for some reason. lol
Guy: Oh i get it! You draw power from a rainbow like superman draws power from the sun!

Me and my guy friend are both nerds, which made it a superlol for us both.

AmblingSam · 31st Jul 2012, 01:05 PM

[names replaced]
So I told Julie and Katie, some girls I eat lunch with, I was gay. The next day we were talking.
Katie: I'm wearing this new dress.
Me: You look beeeeutiful Julie. (I said the wrong name) I...I mean Katie!
Julie: You srsly forgot my name?
Taby: (Who I didn't tell at this point) At least we know [Me] like Julie!

Katie, Julie, and I looked at each other and laughed. I then told Taby.

31st Jul 2012, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloudbreaker

Me: "So you know how sometimes girls use the phrase 'How come all the nice guys are either taken or gay?' Well... I'm not taken."

LOL OMG <33333
I'm so using that.

fi390 · 1st Aug 2012, 09:28 PM

So I had finally decided to come out to my fraternity brothers, we had a member who was gay and one who was bi already, so I felt pretty comfortable. We were having our weekly chapter meeting and it came to the point where we where asked if we had anything to announce, I raised my hand and started:

Me: So I've been struggling with it for a while, but after a lot of self reflection I've come to realize that I am Bisexual, (trying to lighten the mood with a joke i say) and I find none of you fuckers attractive.

Brother A: (He stands up points and shouts very seriously) Not cool man, (changes his tone to joking) I think I look very smexy.

We all laughed and were very jokey and friendly after that.

I don't remember everything that was said after that but a few comments that stick out are.

You are the worst dressed queer I've ever met.

You know I'm still gonna make gay jokes right.

(I had roomed with the Bi member the term before)
So Ted turned you huh.

So I guess this means you're an ass man.

So that's why you always won at gay chicken.

(It had become known that one of our straight members had been kissed by a gay friend of his when he was going through a bi-curious phase)
So are you jelly of Mike?

Please tell me you are at least a top.

Then when I told my mother

Me: I'm Bisexual
Her: So you aren't gay?

fatalmoon91 · 2nd Aug 2012, 01:19 AM

ok so i didn't really do this one but the story from my moms point of view was hilarious to me, and theres a bit of a back story. my bio spermdoner that left me in a hospital six years ago has been in town with my parents for the past few months and he had been avoiding my mom. well my mom saw him trying to avoid her at a gas station and went over and made him talk to her. she found out he had a new girlfriend that has been on his ass about trying to reconnect with his kids and talk to me and my siblings again and she was with him at the time. she also found out that his new girlfriend happened to be someone who worked at the gas station often and that she knew who we were cause im nocturnal and would go to the gas station to get a drink alot. well he eventually asked my mom if i was gay and his girlfriend looked at him and said "well if you knew the kid you woudn't have to ask that!"

dairyuu · 2nd Aug 2012, 02:49 AM

I was in the checkout line in a market specializing in Japanese import goods and I was making small talk with the 30-or-so cashier. Out of the blue, she goes "are you gay?". (It was how I dress, I'm sure of it). And just to see her reaction, I say "私は同性愛者です。", a relatively formal way to say "I'm gay" in Japanese.
She told me that I talk like an old woman.

Bobbgooduk · 2nd Aug 2012, 03:07 AM

When I told my mum, she said, "Yer not are ye? Shit!"

And then she asked me if that was why I had a beard like George Michael.

Well, I used to have a full beard until it developed white patches and gave me a panda look, so I reduced it to a moustache and goatee - nothing could have been further from my mind than George Michael!!

16th Jul 2012, 01:31 PM	#822
RachyAnn MLP ~ brony Regular Member Gender: bro, I'm not a bro Orientation: bi, but i like guys more Out Status: You ask, I'll tell. anyone, BUT my dad Location: Ohio Age: 16 Posts: 11 Join Date: May 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out A conversation with my sister and I (she already knows about the girl im dating) my sis: so, have you kissed her? me: yes sis: EW! me: not ew...amazing(: sis: no, pretty gross I run to the kitchen where my mom is and yell "MOOOM, (sister) IS MAKING FUN OF MY SEXUALITY!!!" mom: what?!?? me: uhhh.. sis: yeah, she has a girlfriend mom: oh, who? me: (girlfriend) sis: you know the REEALLY hyper one, like worse than (my friend) hyper mom: oh, hunny you need to get a new girlfriend ~~~~ A couple weeks later my sis and I are talking about about my girlfriend, my mom hears something and says "What?" me: just talking about (girlfriend) and how how her dad is being stupid and not letting us be together and stuff mom: oh, I thought you guys were kidding __________________ Love me for me, not for who I am, or what I've become<3 I live in a world, where love can't just be love and that's.....pretty, stupid.

16th Jul 2012, 10:33 PM	#823
babyjax13 Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Momma and Papa Bear!!! Age: 20 Posts: 85 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out Me: blah blah blah blah blah....blah blah blah....I'm gay. My Mom: OH. Well, you know that doesn't change anything right? Me: Yah. Mom: Will you still walk the dogs? Haha! But we did have a deep discussion, thanks for all the help guys - now I just gotsta tell a few more people!

19th Jul 2012, 11:14 AM	#826
DraculasSister Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: All but family Location: Nevada Posts: 11 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out My best friend said, "Now I can judge more people who date you" haha

19th Jul 2012, 08:31 PM	#827
Raindrop Member Regular Member Gender: Fm bio, feel like all genders/no genders at once Orientation: pan or bi to avoid confusion Out Status: Everyone but brother and extended family Posts: 27 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out Me - Never have I ever dated a boy. Friend - So you've dated a girl. Me - Um yeah, actually. Friend - Don't fucked with me. Seriously? Me - Seriously. Friend - Cool. __________________ Raindrop "Liars. You know who you are and you know who you like and no one's going to change that... shiiiit." -André, But I'm a Cheerleader

20th Jul 2012, 06:07 PM	#828
andersonh09 EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to anyone and everyone Location: New England Age: 22 Posts: 299 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out friend "Don't you think Miggs is hot?" Me "well uh... FYI, I'm a lesbian." Friend "you can still appreciate a guys' good looks." Me "True, ya, he's pretty good looking. But I like Hannah better." __________________ "Don't be afraid to try new things. Remember, amateurs built the arch and professionals built the titanic."

20th Jul 2012, 07:49 PM	#829
secretgirlX EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Most Know; Open About It Location: Long Island Age: 15 Posts: 738 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: funny responses you got when you came out During Truth or Dare - Guy : "If you were a lesbian, which girl here would you fuck?" Me : "Well I am bisexual..." Bunch of other people : "Really?! That's so cool!" Girl : "Oh come on, I know it'd be me!" Me : "Yeah... I'm not gonna lie, it'd definitely be you!"

25th Jul 2012, 12:46 PM	#830
Superlife Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: All but family Location: Buckingham Age: 18 Posts: 21 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out Me: I'm gay... Friend: so if I rub my boobs in your face you won't get a boner?! Me: urm...no. Friend: fuck...I thought you were just a bit camp.

29th Jul 2012, 07:10 PM	#831
Smilodon Member Regular Member Gender: Transgender - FtM Orientation: Pansexual Out Status: No longer ClosetStuck! (Mostly) Location: California Posts: 17 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out I told one of my best friends last night... (It took me an hour and a half. xD) She was fine with it! It wasn't until she started asking questions that it got funny. E: So, basically, you think you're a guy in a girl's body? Me: Yeah, that's pretty much how it works... E: No wonder you didn't want to buy a dress...

30th Jul 2012, 07:53 AM	#832
LSunday Publicly Secretive Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out for all the world to see. Location: New Jersey/College in Ohio Age: 19 Posts: 322 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out after a very long, personal discussion with my dad Him: So... Who's cute? This is extra amusing because he teaches at my school, and thus knows every guy in the Senior and Junior class...

30th Jul 2012, 04:45 PM	#833
Cloudbreaker Silver Lining Harvester Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: All the way out, but many haven't noticed yet. Age: 26 Posts: 182 Join Date: Mar 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out This isn't really a response, but I thought it was amusing. This is how I came out to my two younger sisters. Me: "So you know how sometimes girls use the phrase 'How come all the nice guys are either taken or gay?' Well... I'm not taken." __________________ It isn't us against them. Don't you see? We are them. If you don't strive for the impossible, how are you supposed to know what is possible?

31st Jul 2012, 12:29 PM	#834
CTJ EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: A few people Location: UK, East Midlands Age: 23 Posts: 520 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out I've only really come out to two people, and i came out to both at the same time when i was really drunk. At this point i'd drank a bottle of Jagermeister and was almost done with a bottle of wine and i just turned round and said: me: we've known each other for a while now girl:.....yeah guy:... me: i feel like i should really be honest with you girl: SECRETS! (i normally avoid telling anyone anything about myself) guy: oh fucking hell...im gonna get a drink walks out (i think he knew what was coming, i've known him for since i was 11) Me: Thing is...im gay girl: fuck off Me: yeah, its true guy walks in guy: what i miss? me: im gay guy:....ok girl: really? is that why when i said i had a thing for you you turned me down?! i spent an hour crying over that! me: yeah, sorry Girl: oh well Me: is that it? girl: what? you expect some sort of big deal? me: well, yeah, kinda guy: sucks to be you It wasnt until much later that i found out neither of them really believed me, because apparently earlier in the night i had claimed i could be an actor and they laughed at me telling me i couldnt lie for shit. They thought i'd made it all up to prove i could act, it wasnt until they added everything up that they realised i was telling the truth ---------- Post added 31st Jul 2012 at 11:33 AM ---------- I thought i'd add this one, not really coming out but a funny remark anyway. Me and the two i'd come out to were heading towards a restaurant. It had just finished raining and a double rainbow appeared Girl: Oh! Pretty! A double rainbow! Me: Thats weird, i feel drawn to the rainbow for some reason. lol Guy: Oh i get it! You draw power from a rainbow like superman draws power from the sun! Me and my guy friend are both nerds, which made it a superlol for us both.

31st Jul 2012, 01:05 PM	#835
AmblingSam Oh hai! Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: ohio Posts: 243 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out [names replaced] So I told Julie and Katie, some girls I eat lunch with, I was gay. The next day we were talking. Katie: I'm wearing this new dress. Me: You look beeeeutiful Julie. (I said the wrong name) I...I mean Katie! Julie: You srsly forgot my name? Taby: (Who I didn't tell at this point) At least we know [Me] like Julie! Katie, Julie, and I looked at each other and laughed. I then told Taby.

1st Aug 2012, 09:28 PM	#837
fi390 Newbie Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: A few people Location: California Age: 20 Posts: 5 Join Date: Aug 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out So I had finally decided to come out to my fraternity brothers, we had a member who was gay and one who was bi already, so I felt pretty comfortable. We were having our weekly chapter meeting and it came to the point where we where asked if we had anything to announce, I raised my hand and started: Me: So I've been struggling with it for a while, but after a lot of self reflection I've come to realize that I am Bisexual, (trying to lighten the mood with a joke i say) and I find none of you fuckers attractive. Brother A: (He stands up points and shouts very seriously) Not cool man, (changes his tone to joking) I think I look very smexy. We all laughed and were very jokey and friendly after that. I don't remember everything that was said after that but a few comments that stick out are. You are the worst dressed queer I've ever met. You know I'm still gonna make gay jokes right. (I had roomed with the Bi member the term before) So Ted turned you huh. So I guess this means you're an ass man. So that's why you always won at gay chicken. (It had become known that one of our straight members had been kissed by a gay friend of his when he was going through a bi-curious phase) So are you jelly of Mike? Please tell me you are at least a top. Then when I told my mother Me: I'm Bisexual Her: So you aren't gay?

2nd Aug 2012, 01:19 AM	#838
fatalmoon91 both sides of the coin Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: my rainbow shines brightly Out Status: Out to everyone Posts: 288 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out ok so i didn't really do this one but the story from my moms point of view was hilarious to me, and theres a bit of a back story. my bio spermdoner that left me in a hospital six years ago has been in town with my parents for the past few months and he had been avoiding my mom. well my mom saw him trying to avoid her at a gas station and went over and made him talk to her. she found out he had a new girlfriend that has been on his ass about trying to reconnect with his kids and talk to me and my siblings again and she was with him at the time. she also found out that his new girlfriend happened to be someone who worked at the gas station often and that she knew who we were cause im nocturnal and would go to the gas station to get a drink alot. well he eventually asked my mom if i was gay and his girlfriend looked at him and said "well if you knew the kid you woudn't have to ask that!" __________________

2nd Aug 2012, 02:49 AM	#839
dairyuu Japan-obsessed Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Literally everyone but my extended family. Location: Los Angeles. The straight part. Posts: 248 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out I was in the checkout line in a market specializing in Japanese import goods and I was making small talk with the 30-or-so cashier. Out of the blue, she goes "are you gay?". (It was how I dress, I'm sure of it). And just to see her reaction, I say "私は同性愛者です。", a relatively formal way to say "I'm gay" in Japanese. She told me that I talk like an old woman. __________________ Aide oh Seigneur, aide les miens J'implore ta clémence, pour ceux qui n'on rien Dieu aide les exclus, les pauvres et les gueux Puisque nous sommes tous les enfants de Dieu Last edited by dairyuu; 2nd Aug 2012 at 02:52 AM..

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2nd Aug 2012, 03:07 AM	#840
Bobbgooduk Banned Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Age: 54 Posts: 703 Join Date: Jul 2012	Re: Funny responses you got when you came out When I told my mum, she said, "Yer not are ye? Shit!" And then she asked me if that was why I had a beard like George Michael. Well, I used to have a full beard until it developed white patches and gave me a panda look, so I reduced it to a moustache and goatee - nothing could have been further from my mind than George Michael!!