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How I came out (to 3 of my friends)

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Aysh03, Oct 13, 2010.

  1. Aysh03

    Regular Member

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    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Hi everyone,
    First post here (and a long one at that), and as I introduce myself, I also want to share my story of how I came out to 3 of my good friends. I came out to these girls in July of this year, the day before the Toronto Pride Parade.

    This coming out took multiple days but was the best feeling when I came out.
    It didn't start off the best however. I had been contemplating coming out for a couple years and had decided that this summer would be the year that I would come out to one of my friends. So as it began, I was hanging out with a few of my friends a week before the Parade, just talking about what we had planned for the summer. On our way back home, I had decided that now would be the perfect time to come out to someone. A few of my friends were planning to watch the Parade, and I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to finally express that which I told few others before. All I wanted was just shout out – “I am bisexual” – but because of my reluctance to talk about my feeling with others, I needed someone to ask me how I was feeling. This way, I could go into my tirade of how I had been struggling to come out for a couple years and I just never found the right opportunity. However no one asked and I dared not to bring up the subject. What made things worse – the subway ride home. One of my friends decided to bring up the topic of homosexuality.
    Now this would have been great if he was supportive of LGBT people. He however, was not. He began his talks with rather homophobic statements and by far, still to this day, it was one of the most uncomfortable moments in my life. Everything he said made me feel more and more uncomfortable, and not just uncomfortable, but betrayed. Here was my supposed friend who I felt deep down could never truly accept me for who I was. Nevertheless, heavy heartedly, I took the comments in silence. Shut down, I didn’t know what to say, the best thing happened; an opening. Not for me to talk, but for my friend who unknowingly supported me to speak against such comments. As if my anger, my frustrations, my words, flowed through my friend (let’s call her S). Even better still, another friend (call her D) came up in support of S to help fight my silent struggle. That is when I knew I could trust them.

    Days later, the day before the Pride Parade in fact, I had still had not come out, however the perfect opportunity presented itself. My friends D, S, and J (another friend who I later realized greatly supported me), were going to a get together with J’s friends, and I thought – “Now would be the perfect time to tell them.” So after getting off the subway, alone with my friends, I tried to find the perfect words to express what I had been going through, to somehow find the word “bisexual” in my voice and blurt it out. But I couldn’t. And just like that I thought I lost my only opportunity. But as one opportunity closed, another one opened up. On our way back uptown, I once again tried to find the words that expressed my struggles, my behaviours, my silence. But still nothing. And so here I was on the subway, lonely, yet surrounded by friends, thinking I missed an opportunity of a lifetime. And just like that my last chance appeared. They wanted to walk home from the subway stop. Just like that, I knew I had to say something. I had to let someone know so that I could release what felt like a straight-jacket (no pun intended, I swear). So there we were, saying our good-byes in order to head our separate ways home, where I blurted out “I need to talk to you”. Confused faces looked at me, and I began to speak. “I need to tell you something. I don’t know any other way to tell you this.”

    “I’m bisexual”

    The two most liberating words I have said to this date.
    It was not what they said afterward that made this moment special (however one of my friends did say she thought I was going to tell them I was dying), but it was what they did. Immediately, my friends surrounded me, hugged me, embraced me, and instead of breaking off our separate ways, offered to talk with me for as long as I need (needless to say, I took them up on that offer and we talked for an hour. Would have been longer if it wasn’t already 2AM)

    And that is my coming out story.
    I still have more people to come out, but I am happy I can share this story with others.
     
  2. x2x2x2x2y2

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    Aww that's nice. Congrats!! :slight_smile:
     
  3. tijuana212

    Regular Member

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    TEH IDAHOZ.
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    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Oh god, that is such a good coming out story. It's great how people can surprise you with their reactions.

    I have the warm fuzzies on the inside now. <3
     
  4. Eleanor Rigby

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    That's fantastic :slight_smile: I'm glad that your friends have been so openly loving and supportive
    (*hug*)