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Stabbed in the back...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by mostashio, Oct 21, 2007.

  1. mostashio

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    I'll apologize now, because this will probably be really long. I have to get this out...

    Well it all started when i came out to my best male friend. He was the third person i came out to. Everyone has always thought that he was the gay one, so i kinda think that it was to take some of the spotlight off him.

    Well anyway... on with the story, I told him, and told him not to tell anyone because i wasn't ready to be outed yet.
    About a week later i was told by my best friend that he had blabbed to someone about it. Lucky it was the weekend because i was absolutely furious. Anyway, I went and talked to the person on msn and asked them not to tell anyone. I thought i could trust him but obviously not.

    At this point I had to tell my parents because i didn't want them to hear it from someone else. That was the scariest thing i've ever had to do. I told my mum first, and she was alright with it, and we had a big cry after i got talking about stuff with her. I got her to tell my dad, and my dad told my brother.

    It was about two days later that my Mum told me that a family friend had found out, which he has never acted the same way toward me since :frowning2: and that the girl my friend told had told her best friend, so i got on msn asked her not to tell anyone.

    The next day my Mum came home from work, and told me that HER BOSS asked if it was true. I was shocked that it got that far in like two days. Apparently one of the girls had told their mum, which i can't really blame her for. I was just thinking it was sad because they had nothing better to gossip about. And its none of their business really. So at the moment, i'm actually surprised that the whole town doesn't know because they're like the biggest gossips in my town.

    So all in all, I found out that i can't trust certain people with anything ever again.
     
  2. Ilayis

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    It would be hard for me to trust people too if that happened to me.Wow....that is something else!!!Well,i guess the good part is is that you don't have to tell everybody,they did it for you
     
  3. Louise

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    That was a very couragious kind and respectful thing to do, tell your parents before they found out. I would be proud to have a son like you:kiss:

    I'm glad your family took it ok. There might be a lesson in this for you - trust your family before your friends. I know this is not always the case but it seems to be in yours.

    On the bright side, at least now you know who your friends are. Someone you cannot trust is not a friend.

    Sorry to be mean but what a sad little town you must live in if the people have nothing better to do that to talk about the sexual orientation of a 14 boy!!! Whatever people say, hold your head up high, be proud, you should be and your parents can be proud of you as well.:icon_bigg
     
  4. TeeBe

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    You must be in a really small, close-knit place. How on earth could gossip travel so fast?? It seems like you may want to look in other places for a confidant- clearly, your friends are a little too loud. I can't say that they are bad friends, they just may not be the most tight-lipped people on earth. Not trying to defend them, but on the flip side, they may have been discussing your orientation because your friend needed support. After all, it isn't always an easy thing for people to cope with. The main question is: are they still there for you now? Are they still your friendly, supportive friends? That is what makes a true friend.
     
  5. SpikySpice

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    Sorry for what happen, I know they piss you off by tellign peopel without your permission, but that dosnet mena taht they are mena or rude or anything, just cant keep their mouths shut, and yeah, teh thing is are they gonna be there when you nee them.

    I understan dhow you feel, it's crazy world lol, but if you dont think it's comfortable to come out, then dont at the moment
     
  6. dictionary

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    Has your friend said anything like an apology for not keeping your secret what did your mum say or had you alredy told her?
     
  7. beckyg

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    These things happen in small towns. Same thing happened here with my son. He told his cousins and one of them blabbed to his grandparents. My son told his great aunt and she blabbed to her kids, one of whom is a chiropractor! He blabbed to other family members who were his patients! It's crazy. What I would suggest is that you just try to move on and forget this. Just live your life openly and authentically and show them the wonderful person that you are!
     
  8. Corey

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    I disagree... if the person was so in need to talk about you being gay... they should have come and talk to you... especially when you tell them not to tell anyone else and they tell another person... i personally would never trust that person again... and i would find it hard to be friends with that person

    But kudos for cleaning up that mess... and another kudos for telling the rents, that in itself is huge... so congrats
     
  9. Jeimuzu

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    I've got a lot of respect for what you did, telling your parents before they found out from somewhere else. That was brave, honest, and exactly the right thing to do.

    I'm sad to hear that those people couldn't be trusted. I'm sure, in time, you'll make friends who would willingly keep your secrets.
     
  10. InaRut

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    Wow I know how you feel. I just had a friend over msn who knew a friend I met through a summer campy type ordeal. Anyways my friend told that friend just recently. And I can tell you it sucks. Kinda gives you that unwanted pull as you slowly open that closet door eh? *looks back and knocks on the closed door* Let me back in! It's to bright out here!
     
  11. mostashio

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    Well, my friend totally denied it, no sorry or nothing. after mum had found out she was not happy!! She can't stand their whole family, because they're all a bit like that. and that made her just not like them even more.
     
  12. mostashio

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    I just wanna say thanx to all the people who have posted replies. I'm just thankful that i have at least a couple of good friends that i can trust. If it weren't for my best friend, i wouldn't have even known that it had been blabbed to anyone. I'm just glad that i got to tell my parents before it got to them from someone else, even though it was one of the most scariest things ive ever had to do. It's good to know that i'm not the only one thats gone through this sorta thing aswell. Thanks for all the support
     
  13. CrimsonThunder

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    Damn sorry to hear about that mostashio, well at least you know you're popular enough to be the talk of the town. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  14. mostashio

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    LOL!
     
  15. InaRut

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    Yea man :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: always think optimistic :grin:
     
  16. CelebrityHead

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    Tom: Taking the piss out of everything since '88
     
  17. waitingsucks

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    that sucks, things like that make people not wanna come out. Y would they spread that stuff in the first place anyway. I mean a good friend shouldn't even do that about the most interesting thing in the world. I guess u have to take the good with the bad. at least ur out now. if that's much conselation
     
  18. GoBabyGoGo

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    sorry to hear about that... thankyou so much for posting it though! i live in a small kinda rural town in NSW and i am[was] just about ready to come out to some of my friends... yea so now im kinda doubtful...

    but im thinking, so what if a few people know who you are? they'll probly forget about it in a few days... like, so what if your gay? i mean, sure you don't really WANT people to know something personal like that about you, and it's really sad that your friend blabbed about it... but they know the truth, and some people like you, and some people hate you and thats their problem... unless of course theyre such homophobic dickheads that they'll do something about it!

    sorry if that was really confusing

    id rather be hated for who i am, than loved for who i am not -- kurt cobain
     
  19. mostashio

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    Thats the way I'm taking it at the moment, i straighten my hair sometimes when i go to school, and the guys in my class used to ask me if i was gay every time i'd do it, but they haven't asked me if I am since i decided that i'm not gonna hide it anymore, but it will happen eventually. No doubt some people will hate me, but that's life. I can't please anyone, i believe i'm a nice person so its they're loss in the end.
     
  20. CelebrityHead

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    I like that attitude, I reckon more people should take a leaf out of your book now!