Came out to my parents last week

Congratulations, let no one underestimate how brave you are to do that!

I hope your parents just need time to process it. I'm sure your dad was just trying to relieve tension and ended up making it more awkward. They'll need time, and hopefully they'll come round to full acceptance. If it was me, I would consider 'the ball is in their court', you've done an unimaginably difficult thing and now it's their job to process it.

However, I wouldn't play along with any 'pretending it never happened' games. If you get a serious boyfriend, then talk to them about him. That could even help them get used to the idea of gay relationships as just like any other, rather than whatever they imagine it to be.

 

Congratulations for coming out to your parents (*hug*). I am glad your mom is loving and supportive, as for you dad he probably just needs some time for the news to sink in. Hopefully he'll come to term with this.

As for bringing it or not, I am not exactly an expert in terms of coming out, but I think the best thing is just to be casual about it. It doesn't really require any in depth conversation if you don't feel the need to, but on occasions, don't hesitate to talk about it (like when there is something LGBT related on the news). And obviously, when you'll have a boyfriend, talk to them about him.

Take care, Cécile

 

Congrats on coming out to your parents. Like what was said give your parents time. They have their own "coming out" process to go through. Just be there if and when they have questions.

 

It sounds like they responded pretty well, actually. Your mom was fine, and your dad was just uncomfortable, rather than hostile. Uncomfortable he'll get over, at least mostly. (He might never be comfortable talking about gay sex, but you probably wouldn't really want him to anyway.)

You might want to send them to the PFLAG website, for whatever support they might need. For example, they might have their own fears about how people will respond to them as the parents of a gay person, just as we often have fears about how people will respond to us when they know we're gay. So, it's nice for them to have that resource. You could also look up the PFLAG chapter that is closest to them.

Just let them know that you've been thinking about what they might be going through, and you wanted them to have whatever help they might need. Tell them they can ask you any questions they might have, but that sometimes it might be easier or more comfortable for them to ask someone else, in which case they can talk to someone at PFLAG.

In the future, don't be afraid to talk about it when you want to or it's pertinent. There are various reasons why they may not have brought it up--they may not know what to say, really. I don't think you have to wait until they bring it up themselves.

 

I think months is more likely than years, really. It will take them a little time to process it, though, probably.

If they are that polite, that may be the reason they haven't brought it up again. I don't think you need to worry about talking about it.

 

First off, CONGRATS :eusa_clap I am so glad that they took it well. Don't read to much into the fact that they haven't spoken about it since. Think if you were straight, would you want them prying into your sex life...i'm thinking no. They just need a bit of time to process the new information. You've been processing it since you were 12, give them a bit of time.

I came out to my 84y/o dad 2 weeks ago. I'm 38. We have never spoken about bedroom things, differences between men and women, where babies came from. Actually we have never spoken about matters which required anything less then bathing suits on.... and NOW he decides that we need to have the birds and bees talk.....LOL.....AWKWARD to say the least....

Thanks for sharing

 

I wish I had that kind of bravery... Kudos!!

 

Do you usually speak to them every week? If you don't,then don't worry about it. If you do.....don't worry about it either. You can just call them up and tell them you love them and will always love them. Speaking as a parent...we love that shit...lol. (don't worry to much about the 'telling them your gay' part, and what their reactions are, they WILL come around, they are your parents and will always love you.)

 

Hi zerogravity

I would give it another two or three weeks before bringing it up unless they do first.Just give them some time to process this new part of you.

During this time you should act just the same as usual,if you call weekly to say hi,do it.Acting as normal will help them see that you are still you,suddenly being gay does not make you a differant person.If you can carry on as normal they will soon notice that being gay is only a small part of who you are and you are still the person they raised.

Well done,the hardest part is over.

 

Congrats and I'm in awe of your courage! I'm glad your parents took it well, albeit your dad coulda been nicer, but probably just trying to lighten the mood. I would tell them about other people you came out to that they know or funny things people said and how good it makes you feel that your fears of rejection didn't come true. I would talk about gay issues that come up in the news. I would tell them if you start dating a guy especially if it gets serious. I'm not saying bring up a gay related topic each time you speak, but right now this is exciting to you and they should realize how happy it makes you to have positive coming out experiences and to be free from hiding/avoiding this part of you.

 

You're so brave.
I'm 210% sure my parents would disown me, so I just keep my mouth shut, but I really admire your courage.
Congratulations!! You should be really, really proud of yourself. I don't even know you, and /I'm/ proud of you.

 

I agree; My family was no problem. I'm having a harder time with friends.

Congrats!(!)