So today I was walking with a girl down the hallway after school when nobody was around at all. And I was talking about this one girl who I think likes me. I added a "she needs to get a clue". And the girl I was walking with said jokingly "I'm gay", mimicking what I would hypothetically say. Which obviously was ironic. And I totally just came out to her. And it was no big deal. This person isn't even a close friend, she's a good friend, but I've only known her a few months. And I had no reason to tell her, I just decided to not deny it. And I didn't regret it at all. I have been planing to stop denying being gay come April, but it felt like I wasn't even trying to deny it. What does this mean?
Why April, Alex. It is a lovely month. just wondering Honestly, you will be coming out like this for your whole life. You will always be meeting to people and dating and attraction will usually come up and then you just tell them. It just becomes a part of everyday life. It probably seems really pleasant and easy after a few of the "I have something I need to tell you" coming outs. They, in my opinion, are much more difficult, yet necessary for some situations. This is how I came out to most of my friends in high school....(I actually told nora, who was the first friend I told, after she sarcastically asked me....she totally was not serious, but I was like "actually, yeah") but we would be talking about dating or such and I would just tell people, often when I was just with a group of friends. They weren't that surprised and didn't really care. I assume you will get a similar reaction. I don't think I have actually had a coming out talk with anyone here at Olaf (even though I should have with my roomie....it makes it a bit awkward). It just happens to come up, I come out casually and then its over. It can actually be quite funny sometimes.
That's how I want to do it, and it seems that is basically what I did here. And it was the first time that it wasn't a big deal. It was kindof nice to just be able to say it. Why April, I want to wait until after our choir trip to Boston, so rooming is less awkward. I don't know if that is a good enough reason, but it won't kill me to wait 3 weeks.
Be glad that you came out to her just like that. It doesn't bother you if she knows. You're ready to come out. Congrats. (*hug*)
I think it means you've reached a level of comfort with yourself and who you are, and you no longer feel the shame or embarrassment about it that most people feel while processing the feelings and accepting themselves. So... congrats are in order! The fact that you just did it casually and it wasn't a big deal, without great angst or sweaty palms just means you are feeling good about it and ready to be yourself. Honestly, from my experience, most people your age don't seem to really give much of a shit about their friends being gay, so I doubt it would even be an issue as far as rooming with someone in a band trip... that is, as long as you aren't ogling the guys you're rooming with as they dress or undress, or suggesting circle jerks or anything like that, which I'm sure you weren't planning on doing So there's no harm in waiting, but there's probably also no harm in starting to tell people now. Keep us informed.
Ya I'll think about it. I'm ready to face my other friends and such, so it'll be a matter of when. Thanks all for the help I'll keep you posted
The choir trip happened, I told one person on the trip. I think I'm ready now to tell whoever I want. See the new thread I posted if you want details.
