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I'm Out!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by TheScout, Jun 14, 2011.

  1. TheScout

    Regular Member

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    This will be long winded but I'm really excited and I feel like writing this out will be therapeutic. So here we go!

    I realized that I was attracted to men when I was fifteen. Two years of denial and two years of hiding it later, at almost twenty years old, I'm out!

    When I told the first person, one of my best friends, over the phone, my heart was pounding incredibly fast. I was worried about not only their reaction (having heard some homophobic things from him in the past), but that he would judge me for taking so long to come out. He was completely supportive, and stated something like "even if I weren't supportive, who cares-it's your life, screw everyone else."

    I then told a few other people. A few girls (they're easier to tell for some reason...), and my sister, who reassured me that I wasn't too old to come out even though the average age is 16-17 or something, and that it was fine and no one would mind.

    I was going to tell another childhood friend, but then he made an offhanded homophobic comment in the car when I was just about to tell him. Thinking back, he has always made a lot of comments like that that I don't agree with. He doesn't just say "gay" or "fag" as a synonym for stupid, which is bad, but doesn't necessarily indicate homophobia so much as ignorance. He insults the behaviors and ways of life of gay people themselves, and also mocks trans people. I decided that I should distance myself from him and didn't tell him, and have been phasing him out of my life. I'm not sure what to do if he contacts me later and apologizes, since even if he means it, I will still be angry at him for a while, but we'll deal with that later :slight_smile:.

    Then I told my best friend, and he was very surprised, but was incredibly supportive and awesome. I told a bunch of my friends over a prolonged period of time, receiving no bad reactions at all (!). I avoided one who has always seemed more bigoted, but he was perfectly fine with it too. I'm not sure how I feel about him though, since I have heard him say a bunch of bad stuff over the years.

    Then today, almost six months after I started this journey, I told my mom. She was very supportive, which I knew she would be, since she has openly suspected that I'm gay since I was sixteen and always seemed fine with it. I told her to tell my dad, because even though I'm sure he'll be supportive, it's just too painfully awkward for reasons that I don't really want to go in to. I also changed my facebook 'interested in' status to 'men!' (I wish they'd let you add an exclamation point:lol:slight_smile: And I'm transferring to a college for next year that's much more LGBT friendly, so maybe I can finally have a relationship after twenty years of lonely life!

    But anyway, reading this forum helped me gain the courage to come out of the iron-clad closet that I had built up, and has given me an astonishing amount of help in general. I can't believe I wasted so much time in the closet, and I can't wait to start living my life!
     
  2. Colosses

    Colosses Guest

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    hay this i a good post i think i can inspire me to apresheit the fact that i am gay and i have bin lining to myself for 3 years but i am starting to inbrasit sloly i am coming out and i have told 3 of my friends they where suprist when i told them but they still except me for who i am and support me i feal i am starting to brace that emotional barear formed after medal school.
     
  3. thomasJ722

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    :icon_wink Thank you for posting this thread. It gives people like me who are scared to come out the confidence to do so. I enjoy hearing about the positive experiences that most people have when coming out. It makes me hopeful that when I come out to people that I will have the same positive experience...one day... :icon_wink
     
  4. thedylan

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    Im soo happy your so happy about yourself and I leave for college in less than 3 weeks and cannot wait to start some new relationships but it will be fun
     
  5. NordicSpirit

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  6. DarkClarity

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    Congrats. :slight_smile: Hopefully when I finally decide to tell someone I'll get a positive response as well.
     
  7. Miske

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    I'm quite happy for you TheScout :slight_smile:
     
  8. alexi12

    alexi12 Guest

    Congrats! and it is never too late to come out :slight_smile: It's not a race!
     
  9. Saikou7

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    This is a great story! Congrats on coming out! :thumbsup:
     
  10. Tracy Lord

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  11. TheEdend

    TheEdend Guest

    Really great story! Congrats on coming out and really glad that everything went well for you! :slight_smile: Now go get your man haha :slight_smile: