Hello. I don't know if you remember me, but I'm the person who posted the "I F*cking Hate Myself" thread a while back. Well, I took the advice and started seeing a school guidance counselor last month. It was hard at first, but I was easing up. And then we got talking to the inevitable today. Why I was depressed. I tried sort of mustering up the courage but I couldn't say it out loud. So, I told the counselor to look up a movie on her laptop in the session we had today. I told her to look up Prayers for Bobby because my situation was similar to it. Yes, I came out through a movie. And it was just fine. Everything was fine after that. I didn't explode or disappear into thin air or anything of the like. And after that, I had a burst of energy after that because I couldn't believe I had just done that amazing thing! And shortly after that, I got a nice healthy dose of other guys in my PE class locker room where I was changing. Hot guys. :icon_wink So, all in all, I came out for the first time. It was great, but only the first step. But I feel great! :icon_bigg
Congratulations on coming out to your counselor. You could use the same movie or idea to come out to other people when you are ready.
Totally awesome! It will only get better. Just remember move forward only when you are ready. Only you will know when the time is right! I'm fighting with that now! My sister is the next one that I am going to tell that I am gay. It's pretty scary. It will get more comfortable to say "I am gay" as time goes on. You will get to a point when it will feel good to say those words. Good luck!
For some reason I was uncomfortable when the counselor would say I'm gay, but offended when the counselor called it feelings, most likely because she saw I was uncomfortable with being called gay. Does it take getting used to? Also, I have no self worth , self confidence, or self esteem. For some reason I put my trust or whatever it is in people and when they do something that might hurt me in the slightest bit, I am devastated on the inside for perhaps an hour or two. Today, I was on the bus ride home and my friend usually sits next to me. He sits in my seat, and I fall asleep for most of the ride. I woke up and saw he was sitting in some other kids seat playing a game on his iPod and having a good time. I hate myself for being quiet and shy like I am, and people abandoning me kills me on the inside, and they don't know it. The reason why is because when someone goes below the 0% line of self-whatever, they feel like they have no reason to live. I got home and layer down on my bed with my pocketknife in my hand, desperately wanting to end it, but I couldn't. I don't know why I put what little worth or trust or whatever I have of myself in people. I don't know why I'm shy and quiet like this. It alienates people sometimes and then destroys what's left of the little self esteem I have. A few hours after that, I was feeling fine. Having to keep a secret kills me, and the little self confidence I have keeps me from telling. Secrets kill.
