I told my parents I'm bi even though I'm gay... don't worry I'll tell them I'm gay when we go to a Christian Counselor :l It's gonna make my parents happy so hey, I'll go... My mom won't stop crying (I'm surprised she still has tears left) and saying If I were to die today I'd go to hell and the Bible says loving the same sex IS WRONG WRONG WRONG and how when I have intercourse with a man I'll get aids... but not in an angry way more in a "I pity you, my son" way. Anyway, I understand it'll take her time to be okay with it.. she said it herself she doesn't understand at all how I'm "bi"... so hopefully one day she will. She's also saying it's my friends who influenced me to be "bi" and she hated them from the start... My dad is keeping all his emotions in, but he keeps on asking me, "But you like women, right?" so that'll be fun at the counselor, telling him no I know this is shocking to them and they think I'm sinning and stuff BUT I CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL SO RELIEVED AND AMAZING! I FINALLY TOLD THEM SOMETHING WOO!!! GO ME! GO ME! GO ME! Ps: I hear my mom balling her eyes out in her room as I type... I can't help but smirk
Lol Your parents may need a Psychologist. Any hows congratulations on coming out. I am relieve to hear that you are feeling well about the whole ordeal. Good luck on the task ahead.
Congratulations on coming out (sorta)! Edit: Also, welcome to EC! I hope you enjoy it here! Two really quick things: 1) Christian Counselors... if the one you are going to starts talking about ex-gay ministries, about how being LGBT is bad, or about treatment for bisexuality, refuse to ever return there. Psychological studies have shown that attempting to change a person's sexuality can do irreparable harm to the individual, and if a "counselor" is going to suggest something that can do irreparable harm..... yeah, they aren't a good counselor. 2) To make the transition easier for your parents, you might show them some papers and pamphlets that were written specifically for this time! I'll link to four different things below, and you can use any of them, all of them, or none of them (whatever you like!) Congrats again, and good luck as you move into the second phase! Links: PFLAG: Parents, Families, & Friends of Lesbians and Gays - PFLAG's FAQ on LGBT's for Parents and Friends http://www.hrc.org/documents/Straight-Guide-to-LGBT-Americans-September-2010.pdf - HRC's Straight Guide to LGBT Americans http://www.hrc.org/documents/The_Bible_and_Homosexuality.pdf - A short article from the HRC on how Homosexuality and Christianity are perfectly compatible. Seeking God's Wisdom about Christian Homosexuality - A LONG article on how Homosexuality and Christianity are perfectly compatible. ("For the Bible Tells Me So," a documentary, covers all of the points in this document, and then some. It's not free though, so I don't have a link for it.)
I can understand dealing with the Bible's view of sexuality, My youth leader heard a rumor that I was bi and he went off on some tirade... Hopefully your parents can accept you for who you are. Congrats on halfway coming out though. Good luck with the consular and your parents.
Congratulations for being brave and telling them! And good luck with meeting the counselor. Just take some of those pamphlets that Raeil linked here with you to defend yourself if it's one of the counselors that feels pity on you and starts throwing Christian cheese all over you and tells you that God still loves you and you can be healed and that you all should just pray for you and you are not alone because the whole congregation will support you in your way for healing. You have no reason to listen to something like that, but you should try and be patient and explain them about the scientific studies that Raeil mentioned. This is difficult for them to understand because it's against what they believe in, and you are the first homosexual they have met. You are the only one who can explain them what it's really like. You could also suggest that you go and see a Psychologist as well, as Nat3 said. You agreed to go and see a Christian Counselor, try and make them agree to go and see a Psychologist as a fair exchage. You could try and show the film "For the Bible Tells Me So" to your parents, it might help them undestand.
Good job coming out, that took guts! And I'd recommend a family counselor instead of a Christian one, just because a family counselor is much more likely to whip your FAMILY into shape while a Christian counselor might try to tell you you're wrong. Either way, good luck and congrats! (*hug*)
You are a brave soul! I am so happy to hear that you came out. I would like to touch a bit on the comment that your mother said: "If [you] were to die today [you'd] go to hell." I'm sorry, but I cannot believe that statement to be true. Within John 3:16, we find that the Bible says “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." Let me emphasize "whoever believes." You are a human being, which means that you are able to be characterized by any form of the term "who." Basically, it doesn't matter who you are or what predisposition you have...if you believe, than maybe that is the only credential you need for acceptance: believing. Also, when your mother said "If [you] were to die today [you'd] go to hell," she was basically (for that moment) judging you. Inter-human judgement is a sin capable of being judged, as given by Mathew 7:!: “Do not judge so that you will not be judged.” If "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23), then that would mean that people who judge others and lead judgemental lifestyles are no safer from God's judgement than gay people. Maybe your mom should worry less about try to "correct" your being gay (personally, I don't think we need correction)... and start working on how to correct her inclination to judge... But anyways, congrats!!! You deserve the feeling of acceptance, and you will get it.
Even though your parents aren't having the best reaction, congrats on taking the plunge! It sounds like it will be one hell of a ride, so buckle up and hang in there. My parents had a very similar reactions to yours. My mom cried every night for a month or so until she started talking to a psychologist. They both came around, though, so give it time and don't give up. Like other people said, be wary of the christian counselor. They are really good and confusing you and making your doubt yourself, so whenever that happens please come here to clear any confusion or check the things that they might tell you. Best of luck!
