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I came out to a friend today.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by FJ Cruiser, Jul 20, 2011.

  1. FJ Cruiser

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    Coming out to my brother didn't go so well, so I needed to tell someone that at the very least wouldn't care. I'm wanting to wait a few months before I come out to my parents and new friends at college, so I needed to relieve the pressure to tell; I needed someone else to know. I had been planning to tell my friend for a week or so.

    He's probably the closest thing I have to a best friend at the moment. Just because of the social dynamics where I live and my insecurities of being gay, I never did make close friends, nor the kind I wanted to in high school. (That's not to say that I'm not plenty social.) He's quirky, I guess you'd say, and most of his friends are girls. That's to say that he's not an average teenage guy; I knew he'd understand being different. I knew he'd be cool with it.

    I didn't know exactly how I wanted to do it, but I knew that it was going to be today. We played tennis and ate lunch together, the whole time I was trying to build up the courage. Afterword, we were just watching TV, our conversation fading, becoming increasingly dull. After a quiet pause, I said "Can I talk to you about something?" and he happily said sure.

    "Well I uh.... I'm uh..." I winced. I was clearly distressed.
    "Wanna wait?"
    "Yeah" I sighed.

    We watched TV, spoke a few more idle words. Five minutes later:

    "Ok, I've gotta tell you something.............I uhhh.............Crap, you probably already know by now..."
    "No, not at all." I had always assumed that he and others I hung out with suspected it.
    "Well I uh........Ah screw it, I'm gay."

    I said it tersely, in a short tone like I was talking to someone who would be disappointed and ready to fight with me over it, belligerent defense. There was no reason for that, though. I guess I said it that way because I was angry at myself for not getting it out sooner and more smoothly.

    "Really?" He responded in a tone fitting to the way I told him.

    Our conversation continued a little awkwardly, but not at all bad all things considered. Good thing we're going off to college. He really didn't care. Apparently no one suspected it at all, except a few years ago when I reacted weirdly this one flamboyant gay guy who (correctly) tried to tell me I was gay. His lesbian great aunt is cool and everyone generally likes her.

    "So I'm really the second person you've told?" I felt stupid. It was kinda sad that I didn't have anyone else to tell. He was surprised, a little bit honored. He knew I struggled with opening up to people, but my telling him second revealed just how much of a struggle it was.

    After that, the conversation came and went, and it was surprisingly normal. I left his house feeling a little vulnerable, but it was still a good feeling.

    Edit: This turned out way more prose-like than I thought it would.
     
  2. Ethan

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    Very nice! I'm glad it went so well! :grin:
     
  3. acd92

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    All things considered, that sounds like it went really well. :slight_smile: I'm happy for you!
     
  4. Eleanor Rigby

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    Congratulations :slight_smile: I'm glad for you that at least this coming out went well, and I hope that your brother will come around with this.
    Take care, Cécile
     
  5. Gerry

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    I'm glad coming out went well for you! :thumbsup: