So the other day I was hanging out with my best friend. She is religious and always talks about how she loves the 50's and traditional families so I've been absolutely dreading telling her. She is one the few people who I would really hate to lose as a friend. We were both kind of intoxicated at the time and I just started saying how one day she was going to hate me. She kept on asking me why and I was of course just evaded saying it. I made her guess and after 20 minutes or so she got it. She said that of course she dosen't have a problem with it. She asked me if I liked her and I quickly said no and immediately began saying "no offense though!" which we both laughed at. She's been absolutely awesome and nothing has changed in our friendship at all which is awesome. I even feel like I am ready to tell my parents now I really want to tell them before I leave for college but I have a lot of trouble actually saying the words "I'm gay." Its as if I physically can't force them out, any advice?
Congratulations! (*hug*) I'm sooo happy for you that you have such an amazing friend! I know how it feels as I just came out to my friend 5 days ago (she was the first & she's been sooo amazing for me too!) & I just came out to my mum yesterday. I really wasn;t even planning on telling my mum, it just sort of came out, but she was OK & even hugged me & told me she wanted me to be happy. I was planning on writing a huge long letter about how I feel & explain why I felt I needed to be me finally, but it didn't work out that way. I know writing your feelings down can be very helpful, so maybe you can do that & then give your parents the letter. This way you can say all you're feeling at once and not leave anything out. It might also make it easier to tell them if you're having a hard time saying the words yourself. This way, you don;t have to feel like you're forcing yourself to get the words out... Again, (*hug*) I'm so happy for you & so glad you're friend is awesome & supportive!
Congratulations! I bet you are feeling great right now. About having difficulty saying the words "I am gay", I used to have that problem. It really is a very meaningful sentence, and I think being able to say it is an important part of accepting oneself. Can you say them to yourself? If you can't, I'd suggest trying to do that first, maybe in front of a mirror. Once you hear that being said aloud, you'll probably start getting used to it.
Congratulations! That is HUGE! I am so happy for you! You seem to be coming out about the same time as me. I just came out to my parents and i am about to go off to college too. Anyway yeah I seem to also have the problem of not being able to say "I'm gay," too. With my first friend I made her guess, and my second friend I said I was 'like' a lesbian character in a book. My mom sortof asked and my dad and sister I did actually say, "I'm gay," to. You could watch a movie with them that has a gay character in it and then say you are 'like,' that character or something like that. The way I did it with my sister is I told her over Ben and Jerry's ice cream. And the way I did it with my dad was I used the recent legalizing of gay marriage to help bring up the topic. It IS hard though I know. The way I motivated myself is that I would first say to myself, "OK I have to come out to this person soon, and then I would find a good opportunity (like my sister asking me to have ice cream with her, or the gay marriage law being passed in new york) and then I would say, OK I am coming out to this person TODAY! And I would force myself to do it. But sometimes opportunities don't present themselves, so you have to create them yourself. Like with the first two people I told, I invited them over to cook with me. So I would have time alone with that person to talk. Also you have to decide weather you want to tell your parents separately or together. I personally preferred doing it seperately, because I only had to deal with the one person at a time. But the choice is completely yours. I can see how telling them together would be advantageous too though. Do you think/know they would be supportive, or do you have no idea?
That's great! Congrats on having an awesome friend by your side! Like Bowie already said, sometimes saying it to yourself in front of a mirror helps. Do it every day and say it with a smile. Little by little you'll get there
