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Out to another

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by pirateninja, Nov 28, 2007.

  1. pirateninja

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    Kind of "outed myself" to a new girl in my art class. Had a (loud) discussion about homosexuality with my friends in the common room and I think she overheard it. Then because I am selling AIDS ribbons for AIDS day this Saturday I was asked where I got them from I told another friend that I got them from my "Gay group". New girl overhears again and says "So, you're definitely gay?". She seems slightly shocked but not too worried about it.

    So am now out to another person!

    Plus, just another question: Why is it easier to tell people who you're friends with but maybe haven't known for ages than family members? I've only known the girl for a couple of months, but I still can't pluck up the courage to tell my grandmother who I've known all my life.
     
  2. Louise

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    Good for you Pirateninja!(!) (!) (!)

    Ok this question is one for me! *puts her hand in the air* I know the answer!

    Well I know my theory anyway. All our lives, probably for deep seated survival instincts, we look for the approbation and approval of our parents. Our parents/grandparents raise us, educate us, feed us, clothe us, protect us, etc. The list is endless.

    We have very strong 'blood' bonds with our families and normally when the chips are down and everyone has deserted you, you can be pretty sure that your family will be there to pick you up and help you gat back on your feet. If you 'disappoint/upset' your parents to a unacceptable level will they turn their backs on you? will you be left all on your own to face the world? who will be there when all else is lost?

    The possibility of this happening is so frightening that people of all ages will go to almost any lengths not to upset their parents and close family; especially parents. From the time you were born they have guided you and protected you... who would/could possibly replace that in your life?

    You probably greatly love and respect your grandma and want her to love and respect you. You are undoubtedly worried that if you told her she would be disappointed, see you in a different light or God forbid turn her back on you. So of course it is a thousand times more difficult to tell your grandma than a girl you just met.

    Not wanting to be flippant but friends come and go in your lifetime, if you have 2 true and loyal friends that accompany through your life you will be very lucky. As we grow older and make our own lives and friends fade away as they live their own lives but family is always there... whether you want them there or not!

    I could go on forever but I won't. :lol:
     
  3. Psychedelic Bookmarks

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    i think (for me anyway) there's a symbolic, deep, importance about some people's opinions. for many, this is parents or family, but i may be other people. so u feel like this person(s)' reaction to your coming out is incredibly important, you can almost feel a part of u that will die in some way if they reject you. whereas with loose friends, their opinion doesn't matter nearly so much.