So I finally did it. I got up the courage to go my local lesbian bar by myself. And it was fun!!! I hung out with some folks and did shots. One of the bartenders - a super butch lady in a hockey jersey - introduced herself to me, and the high femme I was sitting next to at the bar, introduced me to the other one, who was a really adorable gay guy who I never would have guessed was gay. The lesbian bar was really laid-back and kind of dead (everyone kept telling me this apologetically). It was 80s theme night, so the music I walked in with was this: [YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZjAantupsA&ob=av3e[/YOUTUBE] Anyway, I came out to the bartender who introduced herself to me - she gave me the, "Never seen you around this place before" speech. Told her I was fresh out of the closet and that I didn't know anybody. She was really friendly and told me to come back the next weekend for the drag king variety show. I ended up coming out to three people, like it was nothing, like, "Yeah, doesn't the Flashdance music make this bar seem 100% more gay?" I have never talked about it in public as openly and casually as I did last night. After the lesbian bar started to empty out, I followed the crowd over to the gay disco proper. The place was jumping by the time I got there at around midnight, and I danced my tail off in the middle of the dance floor like yeah, I'm flying solo and I don't care who knows it. And guess what? A really pretty girl came up and starting dirty dancing on me. O_O <3 To this song: [YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBmMU_iwe6U&ob=av3e[/YOUTUBE] After last call, the entire bar went to the parking lot and someone just kept the music going from their open car doors, so everyone was out dancing in the parking lot while the bouncer ran around laughing and trying to make sure people were actually leaving. :lol: All and all, it was the best time I've ever had at any LGBT club, and I'm SO happy I made myself go out. You too can make friends and admirers at the gay bar!
That sounds so amazing! I've made it my goal for this year to embrace myself and be more active with lgbt activities this year though I'm barely comfortable with 'normal' clubs so we'll see Thanks for sharing!
Awesome story! And congratulations at striking up the courage! I'm not quite there yet, but reading stories like this one is helping!
Thanks for the replies guys, I'm still riding the high from Saturday night. It's pretty much the most intense boost in confidence I've had in a LONG time. I'm an extremely introverted person, and bars/clubs aren't usually my scene anyway. Most weekends you're much more likely to find me curled up with a book, baking a cake, watching a Dexter marathon, etc... Like, if my life had a soundtrack in the months prior to this breakthrough, it would probably have a really emo tone, like so: [YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUfgAbFY4CA&feature=related[/YOUTUBE] And by the end of Saturday night, it was more like this: [YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6MOKXm8x50&ob=av3n[/YOUTUBE] [Yes, I posted this just to watch Pete Wentz lick a guitar. Shoosh. ] I really just posted this story to show anybody who is afraid to step out on a limb and put themselves out there that it's really not that difficult. Here are some things that made it more easy/fun for me: - I took a cab, so I had complete control over when I came and went. [Also it was Labor Day weekend, so there were cops EVERYWHERE.] That way I knew if I wasn't having a good time, I could just go flag a taxi and head home. - I already laid down rules with myself beforehand that I would not become involved in anything more scandalous than an exchange of telephone numbers. No indiscriminate snogging, no "your place or my place," nada. I was there to drink and dance and make friends. Period. - I made friends with the bartenders and let them know I was new on the scene so they could keep an eye on me. Same thing with the door man and woman at the gay club. In return, the bartenders at the lesbian bar let me know about a drag king variety show happening this weekend, and the door folks at the gay club gave me the personal number of a cab driver who is LGBT-friendly. (Apparently many cab drivers will refuse to do pick-ups or drop-offs at the gay bars here.) - I actually made myself tap people on the shoulder and introduce myself to them. The more drinks you have, the easier this gets. - I made sure to drink enough to break me out of "strong silent wallflower" mode, but not enough to make myself look like an ass or impair my judgement. One of the best rewards I got was that high femme girl dancing with me, unsolicited. It felt really, really good. Like, "You have value here, we see what you are and we find it sexy." I never caught her name or number, but she'll never understand how much it meant for her to walk out on the dance floor and dance with me like that. Nobody up to that point in my life made me feel that attractive or assured in myself. But a stranger managed to do it. Which is why y'all need to go ooooooooooooout.
Sounds like you had a great time. Where i went to uni they had the best gay bar and i would always insist on going just because i knew i would have a great time. i'm actually surprised more people i went to school with haven't asked me if i'm gay. I'm very inspired by your trip out!
maverick, thank you so much for posting this story here. I've been to two gay bars (in different cities) and both times have been really awesome, but both times I ended up there by sort of an accident with a group of people. And both times the people who I went with who didn't know me very well were surprised that I was gay. I guess it has become more common for straight people to go to gay bars. But anyway, both nights were the best nights I've had when I've been out! Just like you, I was just drinking, dancing and having great time. ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2011 at 02:37 PM ---------- maverick, thank you so much for posting this story here. I've been to two gay bars (in different cities) and both times have been really awesome, but both times I ended up there by sort of an accident with a group of people. And both times the people who I went with who didn't know me very well were surprised that I was gay. I guess it has become more common for straight people to go to gay bars. But anyway, both nights were the best nights I've had when I've been out! Just like you, I was just drinking, dancing and having great time. ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2011 at 02:39 PM ---------- Thank you, maverick for posting this story! I've only been to a gay bar a few times but both times it was awesome. It's great to just to drink, dance and have fun! ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2011 at 02:40 PM ---------- Erm, right. I have no idea what my internet was playing at. Sorry for posting that millions of times!
I am sooo jealous, maverick! There are no gay bars here where I live, so I have to go an hour away just to find one. It's so awesome that you had a great time, I'm so glad you did!
