Hey everyone, I haven't been on here in a while. My coming out process has been very slow. First I moved away to university and came out to all my friends there in Sept.2009. Around Christmas though when I came home I cracked. I couldn't handle living 2 separate lives, so I moved home and focused on coming out to my family and friends at home. Or that was what I'd hoped. Instead I kept focusing on traveling and saving money to get away and keep running from my issues. Which worked, and I loved my trips, but never came out to anyone at home. Then on my last trip, I was in Greece and got drunk and ended up making out with a really cute American guy...and my sister caught us! So accidentally I came out to her and she took it amazingly! Fast forward past 3 months in Africa and it brings me to August. I planned on taking August as my month to focus once and for all on coming out to the rest of my family...until my old job called me with a job offer. Back in my rut again...until this week. I've had many anxiety/panic attacks over the past 2 years (several ending up in a visit to the hospital). This Tuesday at work I had another one and decided enough is enough. I went home and emailed my brother. He called me and was extremely supportive (though shocked) and very emotional. He felt horrible for ever alienating me, or saying derogatory things. I said it's completely fine, I never took any of it to heart (although definitely noticed it). I told him it'd be a different story if he continued to say those things now haha. Anyways, feeling great about that, last night I told my best friend...somehow mustered up the courage and she,too, was completely fine with it, though again, shocked! She was great. So now it's the weekend. I've got another brother to tell who I am not too worried about, but the thoughts of telling my parents still terrifies me! I need advice, tips or just support in general! Can I really do it??? It's been such a build up but the way this week has been going, I feel much more confident and readier than I ever have been in the past. Also, I think Monday I may give my 2 weeks notice at work. Even though they gave me a sweet gig, I hate it there. It's my rut. I don't want to come out at that work. I want to study something in the travel industry and pursue a career in that. A fresh start in something that interests me. What do you guys think? It's hard because I feel I'd be screwing them over at work, but my life is in need of some drastic changes. Already I feel better and happier. HELP!
Hey there. Sounds like you're having a great week. So good job! I gotta think that the telling of your parents should be easier now, and you should do it sooner rather than later. Even though it terrifies you, just think that you had earlier been so anxious to the point of hospitalization to tell other members of your family and best friend, but now look where you are. So you should have the confidence and now also the support you need to overcome that anxiety. I'm sure of it! As for the job thing, I'll just say this. I left a nice work situation in the US to move to Europe to get out of a rut (I used the exact same word to explain it to people) and just live and experience life somewhere else. I do the same kinda work but lead a really different life now. It's been more than 2 years so far and it's amazing! My suggestion though is that you focus first on completing your coming out. Get that done and see where it leaves you in terms of your 'rut'. If you just took the job in August it's now only a month so maybe give it a bit more time, say another month or two. Then if you're still desiring to leave and go in a different direction, then definitely do it! The world is out there
I DID IT!!!!!!! I came out to my parents tonight!!!!! And my Mom took it amazingly well. I can't believe I did it! Dad stayed in bed and didn't say a word...we'll see tomorrow I guess. WOW! What a relief. I feel on top of the world right now!!!!! I wish I did it 10 years ago!!! What an amazing feeling! Thanks for the reply too oldies! I will read it again tomorrow when my head isn't spinning haha!! WOW!!!!!!!!
Yay! Congratulations!! I'm glad it went positively (at least with your mom). Hopefully your dad will come around soon!
Wow, man, you have had one heluva week, congratulations! I think the suggestion to stay on at your job a bit longer might be a good idea unless it's a really anti-gay environment which you don't need to be around. If that's not the case, I'd stay there to make some more money until you get into a program you want for your future career. Good luck and again, congrats
