Reciprocated coming out

[PerfectInsanity]

In another installment of unexpected reactions to coming out, today while my friend and I were driving to a concert I decided to come out to him. Just after saying I was gay he told me he is bisexual (but mostly gay)!!!!!!! I guess there were some things that made me think he might be bi/gay, but since I had only heard him previously mention ex-girlfriends I took him at his word and just assumed he was straight. He said that he had suspected it about me and had actually been planning on telling me later tonight, but I beat him to it! He told me that he has been out for a couple of years, but some (including his parents) don't know. However, he said his younger sister came out as bi recently to their parents, so he's thinking of telling them soon.

He is the first gay/bi friend I've had since coming out, so it was amazing to be able to speak freely with him. Holy shit! It was also interesting in that he also thinks this guy we know, who is my current crush, is closeted. It turns out both of us have been noticing various weird behaviors and vibes from him. So, at least I have another opinion about this guy and I don't feel as much like I'm just hopelessly crushing on a straight guy. My friend and I are both planning on coming out to him and our group of friends pretty soon, so we'll see what happens.

What's more, my friend said my being gay will ruin plans for a female friend of ours who apparently was thinking of asking me out. I had been receiving random texts from her lately and noticed her talking one on one more with me in between classes, so I got the feeling that she had a crush on me. She is one more person I will have to come out to this week and nip that in the bud so she's not led on anymore.

After all this upcoming week is coming out week!

Besides our mutual coming out, this afternoon/evening was great at the concert (Seether, Three Days Grace, Sevendust, Avenged Sevenfold, Bullet for my Valentine, etc.). Perfect concert weather and an almost full moon. It's amazing how the stars fucking align sometimes! I can't seem to get rid of the grin on my face tonight...

[Alex15]

That's awesome, I really wish I had the guts to come out to one of my friends and have that happen, but they are all hopelessly straight... I think?

[PerfectInsanity]

The thing is, you just never know until you ask/talk with them. I mean I sort of had an inkling about him, but it was still very much surprising to me that my friend was gay/bi. It's a leap of faith.

[Alex15]

True I guess, I think I need to start the process of coming out, but I don't want to say I'm bi or gay not because I'm afraid of it but because I feel those terms dont convey how I feel. Back to the topic though I have one friend everyone is on the fence about haha so maybe I'll try it with him

[alex2020]

Yay! Congratulations!

[coastgirl]

Congrats. Damn, where do you get the courage? I don't know how long it's going to take me to work up the courage to do this...I really want to...I have this weird invisible wall keeping me from doing it though.

[PerfectInsanity]

Originally Posted by coastgirl

Congrats. Damn, where do you get the courage? I don't know how long it's going to take me to work up the courage to do this...I really want to...I have this weird invisible wall keeping me from doing it though.

Right before I first came out four months ago, I guess I was just at the point where I realized the only way things would change for my situation was if I did something about it. No one had voiced any suspicions about my sexuality at that point, I had no one to talk to about all the thoughts I had been having, and all I was doing was getting older and more isolated. The loneliness was driving me insane and basically desperation drove me to the point where I needed to be the change I wanted to see. I had to let go of the fears I had about what other people thought and stop giving a damn about what homophobic bigots say. The only way I could be free was if I opened up and started living for who I am. I had wasted 11+ years of my life pretending to be something I wasn't because I was afraid. As much as the society we live in is to blame for there even being a closet for us in the first place, the invisible mental walls we box ourselves in are self-imposed. You own your mind, not them. You alone have the power to change and live the life that you want to have. Life is too short to waste on not being your true self. Those in your life that truly care about you will accept you no matter what; those that have a problem are not true friends.

"Do you care to be the layer of the bricks that seal your fate, or would you rather be the architect of what we might create?"--Rise Against

[coastgirl]

Wow, great pep talk. Thank you.

[Alex15]

Yeah, might be one of the best reasons put in text I have ever read