Just came out to Dad... - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

Blkrsn · 20th Oct 2011, 10:09 PM

Yup. I did it, my Mom called me over for dinner, made my favorite dish, and then called everyone into the living room for a 'family meeting', and I got so scared I choked up.

Anyway, I couldn't do it... I sat there tearing up, and then he started to guess, and I said no for all of the guesses... until he guessed, 'Your Gay?'

And I said yes.

And I expected the worse...

And he laughed. Which startled the hell out of me, then he said, 'I kind of knew about that for awhile.'
Me: Really?
Dad: Yeah, I mean, your mannerisms and the way you dress kind of give it away.
Me: Your not mad?
Dad: Your my daughter, and I still love you.
Me: *cry*
Dad: *walks over and hugs me* Its ok.

Wow. This just goes to show you you can never judge someone's reaction. I was so petrified because he claims to be homophobic, I have heard him make several homophobic comments before ( but he also makes racist and sexist comments all in good fun, claims he is none of the above because he makes fun of everyone ).

He said that even though he does not agree with that lifestyle, he knows he can not change it, and its better to accept it and move on. He says its ridiculous how some people react to that information, and something so important on how someone lives their lives should not change anything.

He told me, he was waiting for me to come out of the closet so I could feel better, and not be so depressed. Then asked me if i feel relieved now that I have said something. I do, I really do. Its like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, and I want to cry, but cry in a happy way. I finally feel I can be who I really am.

I am so lucky to have such an amazing, understanding family.

alex2020 · 20th Oct 2011, 10:25 PM

Yay!! Congratulations!

kiersten · 20th Oct 2011, 10:38 PM

That's so wonderful! Congratulations!

Blkrsn · 20th Oct 2011, 11:47 PM

I know! I mean, I was expecting the complete opposite! I am so relieved!

seeksanctuary · 21st Oct 2011, 03:01 AM

Well at least he was good about it! Maybe he is less homophobic than he says? Who knows. Congrats on coming out! ^^

Hidinginalabama · 21st Oct 2011, 07:41 AM

Thats awesome and Congratulations!

**Eleanor Rigby** · 21st Oct 2011, 08:59 AM

That is AWESOME !!!!!!!

Congratulations !!!!!!

sokk · 21st Oct 2011, 10:02 AM

Congrats! That is basically the perfect reaction to a child coming out. He doesn't seem that bad to me. The most important thing is he said he still loved you, and it didn't seem to bother him at all, so that is really good!

Congrats again!

Blkrsn · 21st Oct 2011, 10:37 AM

Yeah, my dad has always been my best friend. I love him. I was so worried because he's one of those 'big guys' who are all bark and no bite...

But when he said, 'I've known for a long time. I've been waiting for you to come out so you don't have to be so depressed all the time.' I felt so relieved. So that's two people who knew already and didn't say anything.

Suddenly, I don't care if the entire world knows!

malachite · 21st Oct 2011, 02:40 PM

so, glad it went well for you.

Happy Dance!!!!

quietman702 · 21st Oct 2011, 05:59 PM

So glad to hear about your positive experience.

thecat06 · 21st Oct 2011, 07:05 PM

That's awesome!!! Congrats!!

sloaners · 21st Oct 2011, 08:55 PM

That's awesome! Congrats!

**EM68** · 22nd Oct 2011, 06:27 AM

Congrats!

Now go and enjoy your life!

Chouchou · 22nd Oct 2011, 05:34 PM

Your post made me smile

. I'm so happy for you.

NoName114 · 22nd Oct 2011, 10:05 PM

I though my mother could add two and two together but I guess not

cityofangels · 22nd Oct 2011, 10:11 PM

That's awesome

I'm so happy for you

Congratulations!!!

20th Oct 2011, 10:09 PM	#1
Blkrsn Well Known Regular Member Gender: Transgender ( FtM ) Orientation: Since I'm trans, I guess I'm straight :) Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Canada Posts: 138 Join Date: Oct 2011	Just came out to Dad... Yup. I did it, my Mom called me over for dinner, made my favorite dish, and then called everyone into the living room for a 'family meeting', and I got so scared I choked up. Anyway, I couldn't do it... I sat there tearing up, and then he started to guess, and I said no for all of the guesses... until he guessed, 'Your Gay?' And I said yes. And I expected the worse... And he laughed. Which startled the hell out of me, then he said, 'I kind of knew about that for awhile.' Me: Really? Dad: Yeah, I mean, your mannerisms and the way you dress kind of give it away. Me: Your not mad? Dad: Your my daughter, and I still love you. Me: cry Dad: walks over and hugs me Its ok. Wow. This just goes to show you you can never judge someone's reaction. I was so petrified because he claims to be homophobic, I have heard him make several homophobic comments before ( but he also makes racist and sexist comments all in good fun, claims he is none of the above because he makes fun of everyone ). He said that even though he does not agree with that lifestyle, he knows he can not change it, and its better to accept it and move on. He says its ridiculous how some people react to that information, and something so important on how someone lives their lives should not change anything. He told me, he was waiting for me to come out of the closet so I could feel better, and not be so depressed. Then asked me if i feel relieved now that I have said something. I do, I really do. Its like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, and I want to cry, but cry in a happy way. I finally feel I can be who I really am. I am so lucky to have such an amazing, understanding family.

20th Oct 2011, 10:25 PM	#2
alex2020 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Everybody important, and anybody who asks. Location: Florida Age: 19 Posts: 1,437 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... Yay!! Congratulations! __________________ “Be yourself. Above all, let who you are, what you are, what you believe, shine through every sentence you write, every piece you finish.”

20th Oct 2011, 10:38 PM	#3
kiersten KierstenChromium, Mistress Of Metal Full Member Gender: Transgender - MtF Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to 127 people & my parents & 1 cousin so far Location: Sarnia, ON Posts: 1,331 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... That's so wonderful! Congratulations! __________________ Penny: What's Sheldon's deal? Leonard: What do you mean "deal"? Penny : You know, like, what's his deal? Is it girls? Guys? Sock puppets? Leonard: Honestly, we've been operating under the assumption that he has no deal.

20th Oct 2011, 11:47 PM	#4
Blkrsn Well Known Regular Member Gender: Transgender ( FtM ) Orientation: Since I'm trans, I guess I'm straight :) Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Canada Posts: 138 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... I know! I mean, I was expecting the complete opposite! I am so relieved!

21st Oct 2011, 03:01 AM	#5
seeksanctuary Weary Traveller Full Member Gender: Transgender - FtM Orientation: Gay Out Status: Pretty much everyone that matters. Location: USA Age: 24 Posts: 402 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... Well at least he was good about it! Maybe he is less homophobic than he says? Who knows. Congrats on coming out! ^^ __________________ but there's no sense crying over every mistake you just keep on trying 'til you run out of cake...

21st Oct 2011, 07:41 AM	#6
Hidinginalabama EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Say no to the boobs. Say hell yes to men. Out Status: Almost every one other than work Location: alabama Age: 22 Posts: 954 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... Thats awesome and Congratulations!

21st Oct 2011, 08:59 AM	#7
Eleanor Rigby Filip's sidekick EC Advisor Gender: Female Orientation: Straight Out Status: Out as straight ally Location: France Age: 32 Posts: 5,401 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Just came out to Dad... That is AWESOME !!!!!!! Congratulations !!!!!! __________________ "Act in such a way that you treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of another, always at the same time as an end and never simply as a means." Immanuel Kant

21st Oct 2011, 10:02 AM	#8
sokk EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: The closet is my friend Location: Norway Age: 24 Posts: 312 Join Date: Dec 2009	Re: Just came out to Dad... Congrats! That is basically the perfect reaction to a child coming out. He doesn't seem that bad to me. The most important thing is he said he still loved you, and it didn't seem to bother him at all, so that is really good! Congrats again! __________________ John: "Oh please.. can we not do this this time?" Sherlock: "Do what?" John: "You.. being all mysterious with your cheekbones and turning your coat collar up so you look cool." Sherlock: "I don't do that." John: "Yes, you do."

21st Oct 2011, 10:37 AM	#9
Blkrsn Well Known Regular Member Gender: Transgender ( FtM ) Orientation: Since I'm trans, I guess I'm straight :) Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Canada Posts: 138 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... Yeah, my dad has always been my best friend. I love him. I was so worried because he's one of those 'big guys' who are all bark and no bite... But when he said, 'I've known for a long time. I've been waiting for you to come out so you don't have to be so depressed all the time.' I felt so relieved. So that's two people who knew already and didn't say anything. Suddenly, I don't care if the entire world knows!

21st Oct 2011, 02:40 PM	#10
malachite EC's realist Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Orlando Posts: 6,480 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Just came out to Dad... so, glad it went well for you. Happy Dance!!!! __________________ It's the 21st century, your bigotry is outdated. Either upgrade or go away.

21st Oct 2011, 05:59 PM	#11
quietman702 Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Wheeling, WV Age: 56 Posts: 16 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... So glad to hear about your positive experience.

21st Oct 2011, 07:05 PM	#12
thecat06 EC's Biggest LNJF and SNL fan!! Full Member Gender: Let's say Pangender! Orientation: Let's say gay!! Out Status: Out to parents, campus, and 75 friends on facebook Location: Central and Northern Ohio Age: 19 Posts: 2,504 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... That's awesome!!! Congrats!! __________________ So many years have passed, since I proclaimed my independence, my mission, my aim, and my vision, so secure, content to live each day like it's my last, it's wonderful to know, that I could be, something more than what I dreamed, far beyond what I could see -Dream Theater

21st Oct 2011, 08:55 PM	#13
sloaners Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to everyone Location: North Jersey/NYC Age: 19 Posts: 27 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... That's awesome! Congrats!

22nd Oct 2011, 06:27 AM	#14
EM68 Happily Married! :) EC Moderator Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out and about. Location: Stoughton, Massachusetts USA Age: 43 Posts: 4,288 Join Date: Jun 2008	Re: Just came out to Dad... Congrats! Now go and enjoy your life! __________________ I'm beautiful in my way, 'Cause God makes no mistakes I'm on the right track, baby I was Born This Way -Lady Gaga

22nd Oct 2011, 05:34 PM	#15
Chouchou Warrior Goddess Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Homosexual (asexual?) and mostly homoromantic Out Status: To some friends, but not to family Location: Wisconsin, USA Age: 26 Posts: 1,109 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... Your post made me smile . I'm so happy for you.

22nd Oct 2011, 10:05 PM	#16
NoName114 Dorian Grey-ish Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: committed to a amazing guy Age: 15 Posts: 214 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... I though my mother could add two and two together but I guess not

22nd Oct 2011, 10:11 PM	#17
cityofangels Well Known Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: A few people Location: In a small town right outside of Portland, Oregon Age: 25 Posts: 156 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: Just came out to Dad... That's awesome I'm so happy for you Congratulations!!!