It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

FJ Cruiser · 30th Dec 2011, 11:20 PM

So tonight, after hanging out with friends, I came home, and it was just my parents and I hanging out in the living room. I finally felt like it was a good time to tell them. I just typed out some thoughts on my computer, telling them I'm gay and all that jazz, and printed two copies out.

I couldn't get myself to actually give them the papers. When my mom asked, I just replied very awkwardly "Uhh...something" and kept them by my side until they went to sleep. I told them I was going on a walk as they were going to bed, and when they left the room, I put the papers on their chairs. As I went on the walk, my mom texted from her bedroom that she noticed I was in a weird mood. Now I'm just waiting to go to sleep, and I'm nervous, but feeling good.

Raug · 30th Dec 2011, 11:25 PM

Congratulations! Hope they take it well~

30th Dec 2011, 11:27 PM

Good luck! I do hope that everything turns out well.

Sunsetting · 30th Dec 2011, 11:29 PM

wow bro, i hope the conversation goes ok. i know how it was when i told my parents and it was a bit awkward, but it did go ok. peace man, totally with you, Me

Ianthe · 30th Dec 2011, 11:29 PM

Good luck! Keep us posted!

thevedman · 31st Dec 2011, 02:25 AM

Well done man! Good luck!

Artemicion · 31st Dec 2011, 04:07 AM

Good luck! Hope they will take it well.

Hana Solo · 31st Dec 2011, 06:06 AM

Best of luck

Keep us posted

Rabioso · 31st Dec 2011, 06:08 AM

That's amazing! I hope everything turns out amazing for you.

steel03 · 31st Dec 2011, 06:20 AM

Good luck man!! I did something similar with my parents. I left the note on the bathroom counter right before leaving for school at the end of Easter break. I remember feeling exactly how you've described. YOU CAN DO THIS! Congratulations!

Chickzak · 31st Dec 2011, 07:44 AM

Well done for building up the courage to do, hope it goes well for you! Good luck

FJ Cruiser · 31st Dec 2011, 08:06 AM

So my dad's out with friends, but I've talked with my mom. She got all teary-eyed like she usually does about these things, and she is very "concerned." I tried to alleviate those concerns, but I don't think I made her feel any better. Still, just talking with her, a saw her change a little bit from tolerance toward acceptance. She's reacting a lot better than I would have expected.

My dad, who I thought already had a good idea and would be rather libertarian about things, is, according to my mom, numb and shocked. I'm planning on talking to him this afternoon. The good news is that his best friend is very open-minded, having a transsexual brother and a gay best friend in college, and he'll be able to talk to him about this.

I also apparently chose a very good method for telling them. This has been very uncomfortable, but relieving. I guess that's how letting your guard down feels.

Hidinginalabama · 31st Dec 2011, 08:16 AM

Congrats on telling your parents.

mnguy · 31st Dec 2011, 08:17 AM

Great job! I'd never do it in person either since like your mom, mine would get all emotional and wouldn't know how to respond. It's good to give them some time to process it before talking to you. I hope it goes well with your dad. Congratulations!

hulu735 · 31st Dec 2011, 09:12 AM

Good job! You're so close!

One side note: If you can't give them those papers and you can't tell them with your words, try putting those papers into email and sending it. I did that with one of my friends, and it just tends to work better since you can't step back at the last second, that is, unless you count the second before hitting the send button the last second.

-Hulu

steel03 · 31st Dec 2011, 10:31 AM

Great job. The hard part is over now. I'm proud of you without even knowing who you are.

Welcome to the club!
The only thing I want to do is just give you a gentle reminder that you can't expect it will take anyone else less time to accept it than it took you. Now you're on your way! Congratulations!

RebelD · 31st Dec 2011, 10:51 AM

Congrats! Hope things go well with your dad. Goodluck dude

BudderMC · 31st Dec 2011, 11:34 AM

Congrats! Now it's almost time to bask in that relieved feeling when it's all over and done with and the initial awkward convo is out of the way. And if nothing else, you've got half your parent's support (and likely the other half too)

FJ Cruiser · 31st Dec 2011, 03:07 PM

I took a break from hanging out with friends to talk to my dad, and he is dumbfounded and in a complete state of shock. My mom filled him in, and it was pretty awkward just talking to him about it. Overall, neither of them understands it at all, but I feel like they will come around just fine after some time.

Surprises: My mom seems to be taking it much better than I expected, and my dad wasn't as open as I expected. They didn't needle me too much about faith issues. I kept my composure very well, which was incredibly important in their taking me seriously.

Nazo · 31st Dec 2011, 03:17 PM

Ah! 4!
I'm so glad it's going well so far!
Keep us posted!

30th Dec 2011, 11:20 PM	#1
FJ Cruiser EC Addict Full Member Gender: Guy Orientation: Guys Out Status: immediate family, a few friends Location: Deep in the Heart Age: 19 Posts: 520 Join Date: Jul 2011	It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. So tonight, after hanging out with friends, I came home, and it was just my parents and I hanging out in the living room. I finally felt like it was a good time to tell them. I just typed out some thoughts on my computer, telling them I'm gay and all that jazz, and printed two copies out. I couldn't get myself to actually give them the papers. When my mom asked, I just replied very awkwardly "Uhh...something" and kept them by my side until they went to sleep. I told them I was going on a walk as they were going to bed, and when they left the room, I put the papers on their chairs. As I went on the walk, my mom texted from her bedroom that she noticed I was in a weird mood. Now I'm just waiting to go to sleep, and I'm nervous, but feeling good.

30th Dec 2011, 11:25 PM	#2
Raug Silent in secret Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Pansexual Out Status: Retreating to my walk in... Location: Mid-Michigan USA Age: 15 Posts: 225 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Congratulations! Hope they take it well~ __________________ I am the patriarch

30th Dec 2011, 11:27 PM	#3
Suracis Guest Posts: n/a	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Good luck! I do hope that everything turns out well.

30th Dec 2011, 11:29 PM	#4
Sunsetting Banned Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: bi, straight, gay Out Status: to some family and friends Location: New York Age: 42 Posts: 950 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. wow bro, i hope the conversation goes ok. i know how it was when i told my parents and it was a bit awkward, but it did go ok. peace man, totally with you, Me

30th Dec 2011, 11:29 PM	#5
Ianthe EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female/Femme Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Oregon Age: 32 Posts: 1,084 Join Date: Feb 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Good luck! Keep us posted!

31st Dec 2011, 02:25 AM	#6
thevedman Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Guys Out Status: More people these days :-) Location: UK Posts: 131 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Well done man! Good luck! __________________ And the wind keeps rollin' And the sky keeps turning grey And the sun is setting The sun will rise another day

31st Dec 2011, 04:07 AM	#7
Artemicion :D :D :D Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Anyone who asks, but parents in denial. Location: Vancouver BC Canada Age: 23 Posts: 1,112 Join Date: Aug 2010	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Good luck! Hope they will take it well.

31st Dec 2011, 06:06 AM	#8
Hana Solo EC's Dear Abby- talk to me! Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Mostly into girls Out Status: Closet is getting a little crowded Location: Not even a dot on the Australian map Age: 17 Posts: 1,096 Join Date: Nov 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Best of luck Keep us posted __________________ Thor: No matter what he's done, Loki is from Asgard and is my brother Black Widow: He killed 80 people in two days. Thor: ...adopted. ~The Avengers, 2012

31st Dec 2011, 06:08 AM	#9
Rabioso Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Not out at all Location: Cairo, Egypt Age: 16 Posts: 20 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. That's amazing! I hope everything turns out amazing for you. __________________ Everywhere I look Everywhere I look I see shadows Haunting over me And I wonder when they'll let me be?

31st Dec 2011, 06:20 AM	#10
steel03 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: mission accomplished Location: Iowa Age: 20 Posts: 480 Join Date: Jan 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Good luck man!! I did something similar with my parents. I left the note on the bathroom counter right before leaving for school at the end of Easter break. I remember feeling exactly how you've described. YOU CAN DO THIS! Congratulations! __________________ And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.

31st Dec 2011, 07:44 AM	#11
Chickzak Well Known Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: like girls; usually attracted to personality xD Out Status: 3 people & mum; still real confused Location: UK, SE England Age: 18 Posts: 245 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Well done for building up the courage to do, hope it goes well for you! Good luck

31st Dec 2011, 08:06 AM	#12
FJ Cruiser EC Addict Full Member Gender: Guy Orientation: Guys Out Status: immediate family, a few friends Location: Deep in the Heart Age: 19 Posts: 520 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. So my dad's out with friends, but I've talked with my mom. She got all teary-eyed like she usually does about these things, and she is very "concerned." I tried to alleviate those concerns, but I don't think I made her feel any better. Still, just talking with her, a saw her change a little bit from tolerance toward acceptance. She's reacting a lot better than I would have expected. My dad, who I thought already had a good idea and would be rather libertarian about things, is, according to my mom, numb and shocked. I'm planning on talking to him this afternoon. The good news is that his best friend is very open-minded, having a transsexual brother and a gay best friend in college, and he'll be able to talk to him about this. I also apparently chose a very good method for telling them. This has been very uncomfortable, but relieving. I guess that's how letting your guard down feels.

31st Dec 2011, 08:16 AM	#13
Hidinginalabama EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Say no to the boobs. Say hell yes to men. Out Status: Almost every one other than work Location: alabama Age: 22 Posts: 954 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Congrats on telling your parents.

31st Dec 2011, 08:17 AM	#14
mnguy EC Regular Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: People likely assume Location: MN Age: 36 Posts: 895 Join Date: Nov 2006	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Great job! I'd never do it in person either since like your mom, mine would get all emotional and wouldn't know how to respond. It's good to give them some time to process it before talking to you. I hope it goes well with your dad. Congratulations!

31st Dec 2011, 09:12 AM	#15
hulu735 Well Known Full Member Gender: Transgender- Male to Female Orientation: I like people, not genders. Out Status: Not out about my gender, out about my sexuality Location: North Dakota, USA Posts: 155 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Good job! You're so close! One side note: If you can't give them those papers and you can't tell them with your words, try putting those papers into email and sending it. I did that with one of my friends, and it just tends to work better since you can't step back at the last second, that is, unless you count the second before hitting the send button the last second. -Hulu

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31st Dec 2011, 10:31 AM	#16
steel03 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: mission accomplished Location: Iowa Age: 20 Posts: 480 Join Date: Jan 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Great job. The hard part is over now. I'm proud of you without even knowing who you are. Welcome to the club! The only thing I want to do is just give you a gentle reminder that you can't expect it will take anyone else less time to accept it than it took you. Now you're on your way! Congratulations! __________________ And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals. Last edited by steel03; 31st Dec 2011 at 10:34 AM..

31st Dec 2011, 10:51 AM	#17
RebelD Member Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Two friends! Location: Sunny South Africa Age: 21 Posts: 98 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Congrats! Hope things go well with your dad. Goodluck dude

31st Dec 2011, 11:34 AM	#18
BudderMC playing Devil's advocate. Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: I have caught 'the gay'. Out Status: Out at university! Location: Ontario, Canada Age: 20 Posts: 716 Join Date: Jun 2010	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Congrats! Now it's almost time to bask in that relieved feeling when it's all over and done with and the initial awkward convo is out of the way. And if nothing else, you've got half your parent's support (and likely the other half too) __________________

31st Dec 2011, 03:07 PM	#19
FJ Cruiser EC Addict Full Member Gender: Guy Orientation: Guys Out Status: immediate family, a few friends Location: Deep in the Heart Age: 19 Posts: 520 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. I took a break from hanging out with friends to talk to my dad, and he is dumbfounded and in a complete state of shock. My mom filled him in, and it was pretty awkward just talking to him about it. Overall, neither of them understands it at all, but I feel like they will come around just fine after some time. Surprises: My mom seems to be taking it much better than I expected, and my dad wasn't as open as I expected. They didn't needle me too much about faith issues. I kept my composure very well, which was incredibly important in their taking me seriously. Last edited by FJ Cruiser; 31st Dec 2011 at 03:11 PM..

31st Dec 2011, 03:17 PM	#20
Nazo Janis Ian's Lesbian Crush Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Facebook, not hiding at college Location: Michigan Age: 19 Posts: 2,071 Join Date: Dec 2010	Re: It's Happening. I'm telling my parents. Ah! 4! I'm so glad it's going well so far! Keep us posted! __________________ are you feeling like a prisoner are you living life the way you want giving time to ones you love are you giving time to who you are