I actually did it...

Well, last night I did the unimaginable. I came out to six of my fraternity brothers and closest friends. They took it incredibly well and assured me that I was being way too hard on myself through all of this.

I feel so fortunate to have such great friends. These last few months have been incredibly difficult for me, and I guess it just got to a point where I couldn't handle going at it alone any more. I needed to actually talk to someone about what I'm going through.

Here is how it went:
We are all up in Colorado on a ski trip, and last night after we all got back from the bars, I pulled a couple of them aside to talk. At first I said I needed to tell them something really important, and it's really hard for me to talk about it. I delayed for a little bit, then finally mustered up the courage to say it.

"I'm kinda gay, and I like guys," I said.

One of my friends said, "Really? That's it? That's not a big deal."

I kind of broke down a little bit, saying how I didn't want this and how much I hate this about myself, but they did nothing but encourage me. We talked for a good couple of hours. One by one, my other friends came in the room wondering what we were talking about, and I told them straight up. It felt better each time, especially because I had my other friends right there with me.

They told me how this doesn't change anything, and they know I'm the guy they've always known and loved. They kind of chuckled at how critical I was being of myself because they said none of them had any negative feelings towards me or the fact that I'm gay.

Most of them had no idea. A couple thought I was joking, and were like, "No, seriously, what are you guys talking about?" But in the end, they were all there for me, comforting me, reminding me how much I mean to all of them. One of my friends even said he would be my wing man if I ever wanted to go meet some guys, lol.

I feel incredibly relieved that I finally got this out there, but I know it will still be tough as I try to sort things out. At least now, I know I'm not alone.

 

Guys, I can't thank you enough for all your support. None of you know me personally, yet you all are so eager to help out a fellow human being as they go through the same struggles you all have dealt with.

This site is what gave me the strength to do something. I was especially moved by the sticky post "Am I Gay?" in the coming out section. After reading that, I got this tremendous knot in my stomach, and I knew that eventually I would have to accept who I am.

As I said, my struggles are not over, but this point in my life marks a pivotal moment in my journey to become true and honest with myself and others. Thank You.

 

I'm sorry to bump an old thread, but I wanted to provide a quick update. Almost a year ago, I came to this forum for answers and guidance. I was confused, lonely, and frustrated. After reading countless stories of people going through the exact same situations as me, I worked up the courage to talk to my friends about my sexuality. And I have never looked back.

I can't say it was always easy. While my core group of friends were always supportive, I heard rumors of what others had said behind my back. Word spread about me being gay a lot quicker than I thought it would, but this was actually a bit of a relief - it meant less people for me to have to awkwardly come out to.

Not too long after coming out, I started dating other guys. I learned a lot through this process. The hardest thing at first was bringing a guy I was talking to around my straight friends. Although they knew and accepted me as gay, they hadn't experienced it first hand, so I was very nervous about this for quite a while. As I got used to it, it wasn't a big deal, and it really boosted my confidence as I got more comfortable.

I am currently dating an amazing guy, and we have been together for 6 1/2 months now . Being with him is one of the best things in the world. I feel incredibly close to him, and we have become best friends. I didn't expect to fall in love with him, but that's exactly what happened.

The other major milestone I've crossed recently is coming out to my parents. They are very conservative and fundamentalist Christian, so I knew it wouldn't be easy. It went about as expected, but all in all it wasn't too bad. My dad was upset at first, but not at me - just the situation I guess. He wanted me to read a Christian books called "Coming Out of Homosexuality", which was horribly insulting and offensive in my opinion. They also had me meet with my youth pastor and what not. End the end, they still don't believe homosexuality is a part of "God's plan", but they love and respect me no matter what.

My parents have met my boyfriend, and I've met his family. Things are actually going really well in that respect. It hasnt been akward when they're together or anything, and my mom even bought him a Christmas gift. His family is great, and they all really like me. He also just came out to his family since we started dating, so that was something we got to go through together.

So all in all, things have gone great for me since coming out. I can't imagine what my last year would have been like otherwise. I have this forum to thank for getting things started, so to all of you out there, thank you! You have changed my life!

I know that there are many others out there who are where I was a year ago, so I just wanted to share my story to let you know that things can go really well if you just take the leap.