I came out, but I didn't even mean to - unintended consequences

Ok, I'm not sure where else to turn for help so here goes...

I came out today and had absolutely NO intention of doing so. I was supposed to have a guy friend I've been talking to over, but when I wake up, my mother is hawking around in the kitchen acting all weird, crying.

Thought my father had gotten into another argument with her, so went along my business.

Then, my mother calls my father back home, and I'm ambushed: both of them stare at me right after my father calls me down.

Basically, after about three hours of intense interrogation, beating around the bush, and leap-frogging from idea to idea, I'm forced to state my sexual orientation. I'm gay, blah blah blah.

My mother starts crying; she cries for at least twenty minutes. Head in her crotch, hair constantly tugged, swept aside. Then after a cool-down period, she goes and tells my father, who abruptly disappears.

Now I'm sitting here in my room, when I'm supposed to have been cuddled up to my guy. We'd planned this for a long time now, and I really wanted to see him. I have no idea how this is supposed to work now; everything has been screwed up.

I REALLY want to see this guy. I don't know how this is supposed to work now if my parents are all scatterbrained about this one facet about me. One tiny thing, and everything's lost; there's people with more terrifying situations, and here I am, pinned, unable to spend time with a guy.

What do I do now? Do I wait and hope they let him in? My mother keeps repeating this line, "Think it through" which I *know* is code for "Don't be gay."

All I wanted this weekend was to spend some time with him. Now I don't know when I can...his schedule is so tight and I'm a sophomore in college. That's all I wanted, a weekend together...

 

Yes. I don't understand it either. She says gays are promiscuous, don't maintain stable relationships, catch AIDS (she's a nurse practitioner and always tries scaring me with stories she's seen in the hospital, "Oh, this is why you don't X.") I get she's trying to protect me, but she was so dramatic.

She told me that if I decide to go gay, that I should wait for her to die first. She would rather not see me at all with a guy. She's like this with anything "life-changing."

I don't get it. I'm so annoyed. I've never had intimacy at all, and when I'm finally granted one opportunity I get slammed with a sudden morning surprise.

EDIT: The reason why having a guy over disappointed them was because I've never brought home a girl. And so they've tuned in on that, apparently.

 

I wish denying was possible; I'd denied for the first hour or so. This isn't the first time they've confronted me about being gay. This, I think, is the culmination to a longgggggggggggggg standing tension between us. It's sorta been the white elephant for a while now. I guess they decided today would be best.

I hope things will turn around, yeah.

Also, I'm a soph in college (19). I live with them as it saves money all around (hate loans). I'm just hoping for the best now, I guess.

 

Just want to say thanks for the responses so far...

I don't get it either. In my mother's mind, and to a lesser extent, my father's mind, all gay people are the same. Which I find very strange, as we're Chinese, and she wouldn't want people thinking we're all the same. Makes no sense.

I guess time's the answer.

 

I hope they see that.

 

Thanks! I really hope so.

I should've mentioned...we are Chinese, but only by genetics. My parents are from the Philippines...a HEAVILY Roman Catholic state. My father was raised Baptist though, my mother, a Catholic.

They surprisingly don't have any religious objections...at least they haven't said anything yet. It's complicated because usually Filipinos are somewhat tolerant of gays; I've always gotten the impression from my father that "they're tolerated." I assumed (clearly I was wrong) that I'd be able to pass this off as "OK."

Unfortunately, my parents do not believe there is any genetic basis in being gay. Here, their belief in Christianity does play a huge role. They believe EVERYTHING is a choice. EVERYTHING. YOU decide what you become. YOU decide to feel attractions. YOU decide to XYZ. YOU. YOU. YOU.

"God gave us free will for a reason. They CHOOSE to go to hell..."

I'll look into the movie though. Perhaps my mother will like it; my father hates those kinds of films though. He's mushy, but only likes sci-fi.