My Best Coming Out Yet - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

Tracker57 · 21st Jan 2012, 08:57 AM

I'm not completely out. I may never be considering some of my ignorant hate-filled family and "friends". But I am coming out slowly and carefully. Some friends just don't get it. One kept trying to get me to go to strip clubs (female ones) with him. All I wanted to do was shout at him--"Dude, I'm a fag! Don't try to change me!"

One good friend is of the same faith as I am. His twin brother is gay and I knew he had a hard time with his brother in the past. But he is very close and I thought he might understand a little. So....

Last Tuesday night, I walked over to his house. I told him I had something I wanted to talk to him about. We sat in his den and I told him I was gay. He had the complete opposite reaction to what I expected. He said he had a lot of trouble accepting his twin brother. But then he had other friends come out to him. He realized that it was not a "choice" but it was just who we are...it's biological. He said he couldn't imagine how tough it's been for me for the past years. He said he had my back and would be there fore me no matter what. He told me to call him any time--night or day--if I needed support or just to talk. We talked for a long time--a couple of hours. He had to leave to pick up his wife and gave me a big hug. Then on Thursday, I was feeling down and he drove over and took me out for beers. We talked and just hung out for a long time. Oh, he knows my wife and said that I should NOT tell her--it would really devastate her. (He was with our family through a near tragedy and knows how she would react.)

Now, I've got a true friend who knows me better than almost anyone. I can truly be myself with him without him judging me. In fact, he now admires me BECAUSE I am gay. I wish all my friends were as wonderful as this guy! (there's hope!)

Tracker

Hidinginalabama · 21st Jan 2012, 09:55 AM

Got to say that really awesome. Congrats and I hope things keep going that great for you.

dreamcatcher · 21st Jan 2012, 10:23 AM

Congrats Tracker

Hopefully we will continue to hear good news as you keep coming out to more people!

Chouchou · 21st Jan 2012, 10:45 AM

Friends like that are worth their weight in gold.

Doctor Faustus · 21st Jan 2012, 11:13 AM

^ What Chouchou said.

I'm happy for you man.

thecat06 · 21st Jan 2012, 12:43 PM

Congrats!!

BenIsScared · 21st Jan 2012, 01:45 PM

Congratulations! That's awesome!!

It's nice to see someone change from being homophobic, to being a supportive friend!

Jim94 · 21st Jan 2012, 02:28 PM

Congrats!! Im really happy for you!

Random Dent · 21st Jan 2012, 02:42 PM

That's awesome. Congratulations.

Mister Gaga · 21st Jan 2012, 06:24 PM

That's really awesome!! Happy for you =)

Gleeko0 · 21st Jan 2012, 06:34 PM

Thats awesome!

yeah, similar happened to me, but after i came out. One of my friends came and said basically what your friend said to you, he said that i was very brave to overcome all these problems and discrimination of other people and...yeah basically what your friend said. I was very happy to hear that, and impressed

pompa · 21st Jan 2012, 06:44 PM

Thanks for sharing! That is a very uplifting thing to read right now.

lazyboy · 21st Jan 2012, 06:55 PM

It only takes one friend like that, and it seems like the world lifts off your shoulders, doesn't it?

jimL · 21st Jan 2012, 08:17 PM

Oh, Tracker I can't tell you how happy I am for you. I just had a huge smile on my face as I was reading your post. This is so big for you! To have someone you can go have a beer with and just talk. So freekin cool. Congratulations! Big big hug for you!

Tracker57 · 22nd Jan 2012, 06:44 PM

Thanks, everyone for the good wishes and congrats. There's been a lot of gay bashing comments this weekend and it makes coming out that much more difficult and less likely at the same time. But I have the backup now!!!

Thanks again for the encouragement!

javgier · 22nd Jan 2012, 09:03 PM

:OOOOOO thats amazing :O

Sunsetting · 22nd Jan 2012, 09:07 PM

very kul man, very kul

Tesco · 22nd Jan 2012, 11:34 PM

Really cool story, glad you have someone like that

21st Jan 2012, 08:57 AM	#1
Tracker57 Married Gay Man Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay to Stay: I'm a 5.5 on the Kinsey Scale Out Status: Only to 8 friends, and some family Location: Tampa, Florida Age: 54 Posts: 175 Join Date: Nov 2011	My Best Coming Out Yet I'm not completely out. I may never be considering some of my ignorant hate-filled family and "friends". But I am coming out slowly and carefully. Some friends just don't get it. One kept trying to get me to go to strip clubs (female ones) with him. All I wanted to do was shout at him--"Dude, I'm a fag! Don't try to change me!" One good friend is of the same faith as I am. His twin brother is gay and I knew he had a hard time with his brother in the past. But he is very close and I thought he might understand a little. So.... Last Tuesday night, I walked over to his house. I told him I had something I wanted to talk to him about. We sat in his den and I told him I was gay. He had the complete opposite reaction to what I expected. He said he had a lot of trouble accepting his twin brother. But then he had other friends come out to him. He realized that it was not a "choice" but it was just who we are...it's biological. He said he couldn't imagine how tough it's been for me for the past years. He said he had my back and would be there fore me no matter what. He told me to call him any time--night or day--if I needed support or just to talk. We talked for a long time--a couple of hours. He had to leave to pick up his wife and gave me a big hug. Then on Thursday, I was feeling down and he drove over and took me out for beers. We talked and just hung out for a long time. Oh, he knows my wife and said that I should NOT tell her--it would really devastate her. (He was with our family through a near tragedy and knows how she would react.) Now, I've got a true friend who knows me better than almost anyone. I can truly be myself with him without him judging me. In fact, he now admires me BECAUSE I am gay. I wish all my friends were as wonderful as this guy! (there's hope!) Tracker __________________ Tracker I'm on a journey to finding the real me. I don't know where I will end up, but the trip is sure fun!

21st Jan 2012, 09:55 AM	#2
Hidinginalabama EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Say no to the boobs. Say hell yes to men. Out Status: Almost every one other than work Location: alabama Age: 22 Posts: 954 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Got to say that really awesome. Congrats and I hope things keep going that great for you. __________________ "If men could only know each other, they would neither idolise nor hate." - Elbert Hubbard.

21st Jan 2012, 10:23 AM	#3
dreamcatcher EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: lesbian and still working on accepting it Out Status: A few people Location: Florida Age: 20 Posts: 302 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Congrats Tracker Hopefully we will continue to hear good news as you keep coming out to more people!

21st Jan 2012, 10:45 AM	#4
Chouchou Warrior Goddess Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Homosexual (asexual?) and mostly homoromantic Out Status: To some friends, but not to family Location: Wisconsin, USA Age: 26 Posts: 1,109 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Friends like that are worth their weight in gold. __________________ "The good neighbor looks beyond the external accidents and discerns those inner qualities that make all men human and, therefore, brothers." -- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

21st Jan 2012, 11:13 AM	#5
Doctor Faustus EC's resident Philosopher at Large Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Not straight. But only interested in men. xD Out Status: People who ask me. People whom I trust. Location: Basingstoke Posts: 1,610 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet ^ What Chouchou said. I'm happy for you man. __________________ "I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." - Mother Teresa.

21st Jan 2012, 12:43 PM	#6
thecat06 EC's Biggest LNJF and SNL fan!! Full Member Gender: Let's say Pangender! Orientation: Let's say gay!! Out Status: Out to parents, campus, and 75 friends on facebook Location: Central and Northern Ohio Age: 19 Posts: 2,504 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Congrats!! __________________ So many years have passed, since I proclaimed my independence, my mission, my aim, and my vision, so secure, content to live each day like it's my last, it's wonderful to know, that I could be, something more than what I dreamed, far beyond what I could see -Dream Theater

21st Jan 2012, 01:45 PM	#7
BenIsScared Member Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Not totally sure....But about 90% sure I'm gay. Out Status: 5 really close friends, and one douchebag Location: Southern USA Posts: 74 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Congratulations! That's awesome!! It's nice to see someone change from being homophobic, to being a supportive friend!

21st Jan 2012, 02:28 PM	#8
Jim94 A soldier on my own Full Member Gender: Dude Orientation: Dudes Out Status: 1 Age: 17 Posts: 260 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Congrats!! Im really happy for you!

21st Jan 2012, 02:42 PM	#9
Random Dent Liebe ist für alle da! Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: La la la ladies Out Status: I don't care who knows Location: California Age: 27 Posts: 1,692 Join Date: Feb 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet That's awesome. Congratulations. __________________ No government has the right to tell its citizens when or whom to love. The only queer people are those who don't love anybody Rita Mae Brown

21st Jan 2012, 06:24 PM	#10
Mister Gaga Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Anything but straight. Out Status: Whoever wanted to know (or not), but family. Location: Does it matter? Posts: 211 Join Date: Dec 2009	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet That's really awesome!! Happy for you =) __________________ Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another.” Madonna.

21st Jan 2012, 06:34 PM	#11
Gleeko0 Chocolate Lover Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Straight as a rainbow!!! Out Status: Not hidding it. And out to family. Location: Brazil Age: 16 Posts: 173 Join Date: May 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Thats awesome! yeah, similar happened to me, but after i came out. One of my friends came and said basically what your friend said to you, he said that i was very brave to overcome all these problems and discrimination of other people and...yeah basically what your friend said. I was very happy to hear that, and impressed __________________ "We're all a little weird, and life's a little weird and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it Love"

21st Jan 2012, 06:44 PM	#12
pompa Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Friends, family and anyone who asks. Location: Anchorage, Alaska Posts: 21 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Thanks for sharing! That is a very uplifting thing to read right now.

21st Jan 2012, 06:55 PM	#13
lazyboy Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Most friends and some family Location: New Brunswick, Canada Posts: 116 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet It only takes one friend like that, and it seems like the world lifts off your shoulders, doesn't it?

21st Jan 2012, 08:17 PM	#14
jimL I Can't Even Think Straight Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Sexy hot guys Out Status: Family, friends, work, anyone who asks!!!! Location: Oregon, USA Posts: 308 Join Date: May 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Oh, Tracker I can't tell you how happy I am for you. I just had a huge smile on my face as I was reading your post. This is so big for you! To have someone you can go have a beer with and just talk. So freekin cool. Congratulations! Big big hug for you! __________________ Jim Learning to love who I am! And no longer ashamed to be gay!!!!!

22nd Jan 2012, 06:44 PM	#15
Tracker57 Married Gay Man Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay to Stay: I'm a 5.5 on the Kinsey Scale Out Status: Only to 8 friends, and some family Location: Tampa, Florida Age: 54 Posts: 175 Join Date: Nov 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Thanks, everyone for the good wishes and congrats. There's been a lot of gay bashing comments this weekend and it makes coming out that much more difficult and less likely at the same time. But I have the backup now!!! Thanks again for the encouragement! __________________ Tracker I'm on a journey to finding the real me. I don't know where I will end up, but the trip is sure fun!

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22nd Jan 2012, 09:03 PM	#16
javgier javier(new and improved) Regular Member Gender: im a guy Orientation: i think im gay Out Status: some friends and people in my mind Location: in a house.... in california Age: 17 Posts: 56 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet :OOOOOO thats amazing :O __________________ hey you!!!! ya you!!! my name is JAVI and i say SUP!! btw if you didnt know i liek pandas. this is my first signature dont judge me XD GIVE ME YOUR BEANZ!!! cuz beans are good......

22nd Jan 2012, 09:07 PM	#17
Sunsetting Banned Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: bi, straight, gay Out Status: to some family and friends Location: New York Age: 42 Posts: 950 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet very kul man, very kul

22nd Jan 2012, 11:34 PM	#18
Tesco Newbie Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: A few people Location: Chicago Posts: 7 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: My Best Coming Out Yet Really cool story, glad you have someone like that