I don't think that it was actually a coming out really. She had been badgering me since I was 14 years old to curb some of my effeminate mannerisms. I had been on the phone with my boyfriend at the time, and she had apparently overheard. By this time, I had dropped my pitch to a sultry, seductive baritone, and we were really getting into a mood. Out of the blue, my mother knocked on my door, and she asked to come in. I said into the phone, "just a minute, honey," and I put my boyfriend on hold. "Come in," I said. Instead, she just opened the door and stood there looking awkward and anxious, and she said, in a small voice, "[my name], I have been sort of meaning to ask..." her eyes darted back and forth guiltily. "...Are you gay?" Now, I had had a rough week, and I was annoyed over being interrupted. Otherwise, I would not have actually been so frank, and I would probably still be nominally (though I can assure you not in fact) in the closet. In mature retrospect, I was probably a little nasty on this occasion, considering the circumstances and the fact that she was sort of reaching out to me here. Anyway, I copped an offended, feminine air, knowing it would grate on her. "Yes, Mom," I said archly. "I am gay, and [his name] is my boyfriend." I cocked my head. "We were kind of on the phone and having a..." I paused and raised my eyebrows meaningfully. "...private conversation?" She was more respectful of my privacy after that. Win. ---------- Post added 17th Feb 2012 at 10:54 AM ---------- By the way, I think I was about 21 at the time.
Well, a coming out is a coming out! Even though you feel that your mom disrespected your privacy, which it doesn't sound like that it was her intention, I think it is great that she reached out to you. A lot of teens/youths don't have a mom or parents for that matter, who *actually* try to reach out. Having that support can come in handy....
Oh, that's just how I felt at the time. Retrospectively, I think I acted like an ass, though I acknowledge that it was momentarily extremely satisfying. At the time, my thoughts on it were, "WIN!" My relations with my parents were strained then. Thanks to my snuggle-bunny, who forced me to to start calling and writing them again, our relationship now is almost textbook.
