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I Came Out to my Father

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by James, Mar 5, 2012.

  1. James

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    For the past few months I have wanted to come out to my father, although we don't have a close relationship I wanted him to hear it from someone close (my mother), instead of someone else.

    It went as I expected. He told her that I was not from him or his son, and that he wanted to kill himself. It was an overreaction, which is something he does in every negative situation he's in.

    I knew it had to be done, as I'm at the point in my life where I am moving forward and making the changes that I need to make in order to be happy in life. I am tired of hiding who I am and lying to people.

    Tomorrow afternoon I am spending time with my boyfriend Jorden, who has been supporting me through everything, and reminding me that I need to take the steps to improve my life, and that I can't hide forever. While I am at his apartment, my mother will also be sitting down with my grandmother and telling her that I'm gay. She will take it better than him, but from what I've heard, she thinks homosexuality is a choice.

    I will update this thread tomorrow night and let everyone know how it went. Thank you for reading. :slight_smile:

    James
     
  2. TruffleDude

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    This takes great strength of character. Very inspirational.
     
  3. greeneyes

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    agreed- very inspirational - hope all goes well! and it sounds like you have a great mom!
     
  4. JRNagoya

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    This is why I firmly believe there is a vast different between who you consider family and who you consider a relative. Unfortunately, even mothers, fathers, and siblings fall into the latter category. Sorry things didn't happen with the best results, but you're right. Sometimes you just have to do these things for your own personal closure and move on.
     
  5. James

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    Thank you both. :slight_smile: Yes, I have a great mom. We've been close since the day I was born.

    I agree. I don't consider him family, and I don't think I ever will.
     
  6. Hidinginalabama

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    Sorry to hear that he took it that way. I hope he comes around soon and accepts who you are and that you are still his son. But way to go on taking that great big step.
     
  7. Shebbs

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    Love you babe. <3 Congrats. Annnnd, you already know how I feel about your father... sooooo... i'll leave it at that. xD
     
  8. J Snow

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    (*hug*) Sorry to hear your father didn't take it well. I know how bad coming outs feel.

    You should be proud of yourself for being courageous and telling him though.
     
  9. Sayu

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    I am sorry that went bad :frowning2: Hope your grandma will accept you. I wish you luck and you have a wonderful boyfriend :slight_smile:
     
  10. James

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    An update: My grandmother is fine with it, and had a suspicion for the past few months. She isn't going to mention anything, as my father is still being his usual self around the house, and I'm sure he wouldn't be too thrilled to hear us talking about my relationship.
     
  11. JRNagoya

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    That's good to hear. Any positive step forward is one worth celebrating.
     
  12. Starshine16

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    That's really good that your grandma is fine with it. Gives me a little bit of courage to come out to my own grandmother.
     
  13. cscipio

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    So beautifully stated.
     
  14. jimL

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    Grandma's are amazing. Mine is gone and I'm sure it would have been difficult but she would have still loved me. Hopefully your dad will come around with a little time. I'm glad you have a bf to help you through this difficult time. Good luck.
     
  15. James

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    Thank you Jim. :slight_smile:

    My mom and I were talking, and they had a talk while I was gone and she explained to him that I was born this way, and that all I wanted right now was support from my family. After that he's been good and no longer silent. I guess he needed his alone time.
     
  16. jimL

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    That's good news. I hope over time he will come to accept you fully......even when you bring your boyfriend home. :icon_bigg