Hi, my name for now is Fefi. I am a FtM as well as pansexual but my parents look at me completely different, as a regular straight girl and this is a huge problem for me. My problem is that I haven't even came out to them about both yet (sexuality and gender) and if I did they wouldn't believe me, I'm sure of it. I also fear of frightening them with such "ideas" of mine, so I really need help on what to do here...I dress like a feminine girl because I don't want my parents criticising me about what I would like to wear and telling me not to wear it. I'm also afraid of mom because she loves to pick clothes for me and dress me as a "beautiful girl" and I don't wanna ruin that image for her which makes me feel bad...I think around this month I'm getting a change of looks and they want me to look more beautiful. :'( ...I really need help here...
How old are you (you don't have to answer, if you don't want to)? I started picking the clothes when I was like... fifteen. But my mum never really picked me the barbie ones anyway. Maybe go out shopping with your mum and find something that is not too girly and not too boyish either and say you would love if she bought you that If that goes right, maybe next time you can pick something even more boyish But go slowly, do not force it. Maybe let her to buy you this thing you want and then one thing SHE wants you to wear Are you transgender or transsexual (do you want to have a surgery)? For example, I sometimes define myself as a transgender, because I don't even realise I'm a girl anyway most of the time... but I don't want to go on surgery.
I'm 15, and I wanna have the surgery but I think that's too far for them and they won't allow it even if I were to make my own choices when I'm older.
That is a depressing situation to be in I'm sure. I agree with Sayu, try to work in less feminine clothes for right now. If you want, you can take the plunge and fully come out, but of course at 15 you are still dependant on your parents so it's unlikely. When you are 18 though you will be free to make your own choices and someday you can have the surgery if that is your wish. I can relate to some degree, as I don't want to hurt my mother by coming out to her, and I have no idea how my father will react. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be for you. But yeah, I would try to work in better clothing for right now and then when you are financially independant you might feel safer telling them the truth. That probably wasn't of much help, but good luck to you and (*hug*)
