Well...after some serious reflection and a certain event that occurred the other day, I've decided and admitted to myself that I'm gay, and not bi. Its actually kind of exciting, and it feels great to be 'out to myself.' It feels like I'm going to finally be able to get on with my life, and its great to not have to be constantly wondering if I'm just lying to myself. I think I had this fear of admitting the possibility that I was gay, and I had to get over that. Growing up, I, just as pretty much everyone else, was instilled with the 'normal' straight ideals of getting married to a woman and having a family. Being gay was never an option. And, to make it worse, I never knew or saw any openly gay people so it made it all the more difficult to accept that there was nothing wrong with being gay. But then I came accross EC. As I think back to it, it was a HUGE step for me just to join. That allowed me to admit that I wasn't straight and how I felt wasn't ever going to change. Meeting all of you guys and just reading the stories here have really helped me to accept that being gay NOT a bad thing and isn't going to keep me from living my life. And so, as I accepted that it was 'ok' to be gay, I allowed myself to wonder if I really was gay. I realized that I had just being clinging to the thought of being bi for some hope of a 'normal' life. But I was tired of pretending to be something I'm not, and I realized that being gay doesn't doom me to a horrible life, and, actually, I would probably be more happy in the end just being who I am rather than who society wants me to be. I'm so glad that I've finally gotten to this point and it really feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and my mind is less confused and everything just seems more clear. I really want to thank everyone here at EC. You guys have really helped me to accept who I am and I will always be thankful for this great place. But now I will have to start the even more difficult process of coming out to everyone...I don't know when or who I will start with, but I will definately be coming here to get support and updating you guys if anything happens.
Hey, that's awesome! Yeah, being gay isn't a bad thing. It's certainly a mixed blessing. I'm glad you were able to find yourself.
that's great! the first step to being able to live fully is done. now that you've told yourself the truth, maybe you can begin to tell others. (not that i am pressuring you to come out)
I want to SO bad...but I just don't think I'm ready. I have already told two people I'm bi(and VERY confused) quite some time ago, but one moved away(I REALLY miss her:tears and the other is fine with it as long as its not a topic of conversation, so I can't really talk to him about it ever, so I still kind of feel alone(except, of course, here at EC). The first person I want to come out to is my mom, because I know she'll be fine with it(I sometimes think she already knows). But right now she is practically working two stressful fulltime jobs(one for pay, the other volunteer work)and this next few weeks is the busiest part of her year, so I don't want to add this on top of that. This spring/summer is probably the soonest I would even consider coming out to her. Once I have her on my side, we'll be able to talk to my dad together. I am pretty sure he won't care, but I just don't know...I DO know that he will do whatever my mom says, so even if he doesn't accept it at first, she WILL make him:lol:
Congrats on figuring things out! A big step. Take it at your own pace. Come out when the time is right for you. What is right for some people is not necessarily right for others.
Congratulations, Dylan. EC is a great place for you to be in your position right now. There are loads of people here who will be more than willing to give you advice and you can read their stories and feel empowered. You've done Step #1. Enjoy your new found openness.
It's a great feeling of overcoming that first major bump of admitting to yourself that you are gay. Woo!
I also found this site fantastic for the very same reasons! And lucky you - you're figuring all that out at the age of 16... 20 years earlier than I did! Congrats! (Not that I'm bitter - better late than never, I say!)
Congrats! I too just went through the same thing. I have been calling myself Bisexual my whole life in fear of being Gay. I have at last come to terms with it and am happier then ever!
Kool Im New Here So I Don't Know Where To Start But My Mom Found Out Instead Of Me Telling Her So Did My Sister, My Dad Thinks He Knows But I Don't Wanna Tell Him. But If Any1 Ever Wants To Txt Me Here U Go. <phone number removed> Anytime....
