Okay where do i begin.. im a 21 year old gay lad! its something i have been running away from for as far as i can remember its depressed me! in school people guessed i was gay and i recieved years of abuse but im over all of that now! im still not "out" allthough i have told 2 of my best friends who have been great. but im from a small town in ireland and if people found out the talk wont stop! im not ashamed of who i am but feel as if i shouldnt have to justify myself as it is nobody elses business and does not concern any1 only myself. i am currently in college after years of drinking and being fed up i returned to education things were going well up until recently when an openly gay guy who is in my course seen a pic of me on a website and saved it.. (this guy is also the president of the lgbt society in our college) so you would think he would understand how i feel..but he has showed the pic to other people in my class and now talk is starting as none of them suspected me of being gay.. ! i wanna kick the fukrs head in im so mad.. but i cant keep running away from the fact of being gay it seems to take over my whole life and i blame everything that goes wrong on being gay! my friend sthat know say i should just deny it and say some1 could have got the pic or is wasnt me.. can somebody please help me and tell me what to do:smilewave
Some people no matter if they are pro gay or not just cannot keep a secret and it sucks that they are that way. What this guy did is very rude and immature. I am barely out to anyone in my hometown as most of them don't deserve to know because they just won't accept it and I understand that part of it. The lgbt club at my two year college was understanding of why I was not out because of a potentially dangerous homophobic roommate and they never once outed me . So it depends of what kind of people you run into this was a small town college so they understand the position I was in.
Hey Mikey. I'm so very sorry that you encountered an insensitive asshole like that guy. However, everything will be fine in the end. I think you should confront him privately. Let's not jump to conclusions yet. Maybe he thinks you're openly gay, and hell - he might have a crush on you or something. Who knows? Maybe he's showing his friends because he thinks you're hot. You don't know that his intentions were impure. If they were, there are ways to deal with that. Confront him privately. Speak to him. Tell him flatly that you've heard that he's passing your picture around. Don't deny that it's you. Tell him that you aren't out publicly, and that you don't feel comfortable with what he is doing. Now, let's assume worst case scenario. The guy's a major dick, and not the good kind either. He's going to decide on your behalf "for your own good" (or whatever other BS excuse he gives) to out you to other people. In this case, you don't have many cards to play. However, if you know how the LGBT Club President is nominated and chosen you might be able to hold that over his head. If he is hell bent on outing you, flatly tell him that you are going to go to the other members of the club (or whoever is in charge of the nominating process / can remove him from his position) and let them know what is up. Overwhelmingly, I think you're going to find people sympathetic to your position. See if the threat of you doing that will silence him. If it doesn't carry out your threat. Alternatively, you can decide that it's time to come out. Beat him to the punch, come out of the closet, and then let the other members of the club know that he forced you out of it with the threat of outing you. If he's someone like that, he doesn't deserve his position, and should be removed from it immediately. Everyone is entitled to come out when they are ready; no one should be forced out of the closet. However, I think you should just approach it at first (until proven otherwise) that this guy is just an ignorant fool. If he apologizes, says he didn't realize you were still closeted, then you know - shit happens. Congratulations you just came out to someone. Maybe you can forgive him and you both will become friends or something, and he can help you work through your issues.
