So now my best friend knows - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender people coming out

timo · 20th May 2012, 02:19 AM

Let me start with a banana!

Last night I came out to my best friend

What I've learnt last night is that making a 'script' about what you're going to say does not work. In my mind I planned how I wanted the conversation to go (or at least to start), but it turned out COMPLETELY different.

Anyway back to coming out. At one point I was like "hey are you up for a serious conversation" cause it was the ONLY WAY to get it to this subject... and then told him I like guys. And that it was kind of random but that I planned to tell him last night. He was, as I expected, perfectly fine with it

Of course some questioned followed, like if I told my parents yet (nope I haven't), and he said it was 'brave' (oh this is hard to translate from dutch haha) to be able to talk about this. SO yeah last night was a great night already, but his response made it an epic night

Another lesson learnt: I tend to make a really big deal out if this while apparently it's no problem at all

And that straight guy friends aren't that hard to come out to

Lewis · 20th May 2012, 02:27 AM

Congratulations!

I really need to tell my best-friend, but I'm not sure what the reaction will be. I really don't want him to be different with me...

Linthras · 20th May 2012, 04:57 AM

Congratulations!

RebelD · 20th May 2012, 05:29 AM

Geluk! Glad it went well. Also planning on telling my best friend soon.

Fisnou · 20th May 2012, 05:35 AM

Cool! Congrats!

I agree with you - the conversation never turns out how you expected it.
I was thinking of coming out to a close friend this morning but didn't find the courage

Next time may be...

thylvin · 20th May 2012, 06:28 AM

Congrats... hope the rest of the coming out process is as smooth as it is now!

CrystalRaindrop · 20th May 2012, 06:52 AM

Yay congratulations!

timo · 20th May 2012, 07:53 AM

Thanks everyone

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lewissss

I really need to tell my best-friend, but I'm not sure what the reaction will be. I really don't want him to be different with me...

That's what I was scared of too but I was all wrong. Well it was only yesterday so I can't be sure but let me give an example what makes me think it hasn't changed. He lives in another city and sometimes sleeps at my place after we go out, so yesterday I asked him (in a joking way) if he still dared to sleep at my place now that he knows I'm gay. But he said he doesn't mind so I guess he feels no different

Do you know how your best friend feels about LGBT people? If he is open and accepting in general and knows you don't have a crush on him (I assume you don't?) I don't think things will be different between you two

Insomniac · 21st May 2012, 02:36 AM

No one is difficult to come out to if you're confident enough

Congrats

20th May 2012, 02:19 AM	#1
timo full of fire Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Most friends know Location: The Netherlands Age: 23 Posts: 1,278 Join Date: Mar 2012 Tournaments Won: 4	So now my best friend knows Let me start with a banana! Last night I came out to my best friend What I've learnt last night is that making a 'script' about what you're going to say does not work. In my mind I planned how I wanted the conversation to go (or at least to start), but it turned out COMPLETELY different. Anyway back to coming out. At one point I was like "hey are you up for a serious conversation" cause it was the ONLY WAY to get it to this subject... and then told him I like guys. And that it was kind of random but that I planned to tell him last night. He was, as I expected, perfectly fine with it Of course some questioned followed, like if I told my parents yet (nope I haven't), and he said it was 'brave' (oh this is hard to translate from dutch haha) to be able to talk about this. SO yeah last night was a great night already, but his response made it an epic night Another lesson learnt: I tend to make a really big deal out if this while apparently it's no problem at all And that straight guy friends aren't that hard to come out to

20th May 2012, 02:27 AM	#2
Lewis EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Close friends, acquaintances & whoever asks Location: United Kingdom Age: 19 Posts: 1,409 Join Date: Mar 2012	Re: So now my best friend knows Congratulations! I really need to tell my best-friend, but I'm not sure what the reaction will be. I really don't want him to be different with me...

20th May 2012, 04:57 AM	#3
Linthras EC Addict Full Member Gender: Biologically male, mentally/behaviourally: myself. Orientation: People (Pan-romantic demisexual if labels matter) Out Status: Immediate family, closest friend, whomever asks... Location: Leeuwarden (FR), the Netherlands Age: 23 Posts: 999 Join Date: Apr 2012	Re: So now my best friend knows Congratulations! __________________ In itself, homosexuality is as limiting as heterosexuality: the ideal should be to be capable of loving a woman or a man; either, a human being, without feeling fear, restraint, or obligation. - Simone de Beauvoir

20th May 2012, 05:29 AM	#4
RebelD EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Most of my friends and family know Location: Sunny South Africa Age: 22 Posts: 261 Join Date: Dec 2011	Re: So now my best friend knows Geluk! Glad it went well. Also planning on telling my best friend soon.

20th May 2012, 05:35 AM	#5
Fisnou Well Known Regular Member Gender: Female/genderqueer Orientation: Yep, lesbian it is... Out Status: Close friends and parents Location: Sydney Age: 27 Posts: 222 Join Date: Feb 2012	Re: So now my best friend knows Cool! Congrats! I agree with you - the conversation never turns out how you expected it. I was thinking of coming out to a close friend this morning but didn't find the courage Next time may be... __________________ "Growing older is mandatory; growing up is optional."

20th May 2012, 06:28 AM	#6
thylvin Banned Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Windhoek Age: 33 Posts: 1,280 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: So now my best friend knows Congrats... hope the rest of the coming out process is as smooth as it is now!

20th May 2012, 06:52 AM	#7
CrystalRaindrop Mentally Ill Genius Full Member Gender: Transmasculine Genderqueer (ze/hir) Orientation: Panromantic Gynesexual Out Status: Sxlty:Most people, Gndr:Close friends & parents Location: Daytona Beach, Florida Posts: 638 Join Date: Feb 2012	Re: So now my best friend knows Yay congratulations! __________________ "Man is free at the moment he wishes to be." -Voltaire

21st May 2012, 02:36 AM	#9
Insomniac Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Straight Location: Middle East Age: 22 Posts: 30 Join Date: May 2012	Re: So now my best friend knows No one is difficult to come out to if you're confident enough Congrats

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