telling a friend!

Hello, I recently came out to my close friend and told her I am bisexual. This is my story.

For many years I struggled with my sexuality. I thought... more told myself that I am straight, I knew that I wasn't gay, even though I have wondered at times if I was. I thought it was impossible for people to be bi. I thought that you could only have "feelings" for only one sex and not both. Believing that just added unneeded stress to my situation, anything is possible in life!

I had a long term fwb with a guy for a few years when I was a young teenager, a year and a half ago I couldn't stop thinking about guys, I wanted to kiss a guy again because it had been so long, I eventually worked up the nerve and pursued my wish. Immediately after, regretted it, then accepted it and moved on. Thought I was done with that aspect of my life, couldn't have been more wrong! I continually tried to bury it my mind, however the more I tried to forget, the more I kept thinking about it.

I had met Jenn shortly after I had "the kiss", me and her went on a date and realized before we were seated at our dinner table, that we would make for friends over anything else lol. Are friendship started slow but progressed into a deep and meaningful one.

Fast forward to a month ago, I recently was dumped by a girl I was dating. We hadn't been dating long but I fell hard for her. After and during, thought ok! I'm definitely straight! No doubt about it! Couldn't have been more wrong! There I was thinking about my past again, which at the time sucked! I had a nagging urge to share with Jenn, my experiences. (I know from experience that opening up to a friend is the best way to deal and move on with a problem)

It was hard trying to figure out a way to break the ice and share my story. What was I going to say? Hey that was good beers tonight btw I kissed a guy before... but then it hit me. I'll tell her I'm bi. (still thinking I wasn't, but just wanted to deal with the pain of hiding a secret), So there we were hanging out in my car in a parking lot one night, she had told me she had big news a week before, (which was just her fighting with her mom, nothing new), I open, "I have big news too!" and she responded, "oh yeah?". Took and deep breath and said, "I think I might be bisexual." she said "really!??!". She's surprisingly a girl with few words. lol Immediately I felt like a gigantic weight was lifted off my chest, shoulders and body! I then filled her in, told her everything. After, I asked if it changed are friendship, or changed her opinion of me in a bad way. She replied, "No, it’s who you are, who you've always been." I was amazed and surprised a little on how accepting she was with everything. I knew then I had chosen the right friend to open up too. Besides some talk about guys, that was pretty much the end of the coming out part.

The next day I had never felt so much better about myself, also felt comfortable in my own skin for the first time. It was the greatest feeling opening up with a friend! I quickly realized a few days later that I am bisexual. And understood it is a real sexual orientation to be bisexual. It was still a little hard, but now I embrace my sexuality now, and enjoy it the fact that I am. I understand there will most likely be struggles in my future because I am, but I know I have the strength to handle it.

I wanted to share my story because I know how lonely and scary it can be, Confused in your own thoughts about who you are, figuring out what fits, also trying to accept what has happened in your past. Find a friend, counsellor or anyone and open up in person, it’s the only way to liberate yourself from the confusion, loneliness or any other feelings you may be feeling.

I have told my friend how much I appreciate her and value our friendship, without her I'd still be lost.