Oh my God I just came out!

I did it! Oh God, I can't believe I am actually writing a thread in this section.
I mean, I'd already set a deadline for myself; tomorrow, but with all the times I've said I'd do it and chickened out, I just didn't really think I'd actually do it. But today it came to a point where there was just no way back.

I live with four housemates at the moment: my boyfriend (formerly best friend who made me realize I am definitely not straight), two other guys, and a girl. I'd been wanting to tell two of them (girl and one guy) about me and my boyfriend for quite some time, but I just was too scared to. However, over the past two months or so, the girl, Naomy, has been asking questions and saying things that made me think she knew something was going on. Since she didn't ask me straight forward, I just tried avoiding her as much as I could and hoped she didn't bring it up.

But this afternoon around 3 pm, her and me were watching tv, and she said
"Justin, can I ask you something?"
Me: "Sure".
Her: *hesitantly* "Well... it's just that I've been wanting to ask you something.. but I'm not sure if I should".
Me: *looks at her for a couple of seconds* "Then don't ask" *awkwardly looks away*
Her: "Ok"

I kept thinking about the conversation, and came to the conclusion that we both knew perfectly well what she was talking about, and so I decided to get it over with. I mean, I could've kept up the facade for as long as I'd liked, but it really seemed silly now.

So an hour later, her and the guy I wanted to tell, Rick, were in the living room, so I told my boyfriend to join us, and then it went like this:

Me: "So..." *shakes, and nearly faints* "I have something I wanna tell you guys"
*everyone stares at me while I have difficulty breathing*
"I just... don't want you guys to treat me any differently because of this. ... ... What I'm trying to tell you is... is... I'm... I'm ehh..." (it must've been very very awkward to look at) "I'm not straight."
Then everyone was waiting for me to say the other words, and so my boyfriend came up with a brilliantly acted: "You're BISEXUAL?" (gotta love him :dry
Me: "Yeah, no.. I think I might be gay"
Naomy: "Jus, we know. I'm so glad you finally said it!" She comes up to me and gives me the biggest hug ever. "And we already know this doesn't change anything, so stop worrying about that."
*I can't stop stupid tears rolling over my cheeks.*
Rick, who didn't bother to get up from the couch: "Dude, really, don't worry, you're still you."
Naomy: "So are you gonna tell us about your boyfriend, too?" *smiles*
Me: *I'm sure you already know."
Rick: "We'd like to see with our own eyes."

I didn't kiss my boyfriend or anything in front of them, I don't know, that just would've felt weird. But we did hug, which is the first time ever with other people around. (well, at least as boyfriends)
We talked about it a little more with all four of us, and then went out to for dinner to 'celebrate'.

Honestly, I feel sooooooo strange. I mean, first of all I'm really really happy I did it! It feels like a HUGHE weight has been lifted off my shoulders. And apart from that, I don't really feel any different! That's what I was afraid of most, that they'd see me differently, or that I'd actually 'turn' into someone else. But really none of that is true, I think... I just feel like something inside me that has been wanting to get out so badly, and that put tremendous pressure against every part of my body, finally exploded its way out. I feel so light!

Then on the other hand, I still feel weird hugging him, or holding hands, or kissing him when there's other people around, even though I know I can now. I guess that just takes some time to get used to

I'm so freaking happy right now!!!!!!!! :eusa_danc
Holy fuck, I did it! Ok I'm gonna stop now, because I just can't put this into words... just... OH MY FUCKING GOD I CAME OUT! :eek: :icon_bigg