How did you come out to your parents?

I didn't really come out by choice. One day my mom came to me and asked if I was gay, and I hesitated but told her I was bisexual. She then told me she's fine with it, but thinks that I'm going to grow up to be either gay or straight, and asked me a bunch of questions. She was cool about it, I just don't really like telling my mom stuff about my life... My dad... umm... he passed away before I even started realizing I liked girls, so I didn't even get the chance to come out to him.

Are you planning on coming out? If so I hope it goes well for you!

 

i sat my immediate family down at a table and said "i have something to tell all of you" and then preceeded to freak out for the next ten minutes and then finally came out with it. Honestly, i wish i hadn't... not because their reactions were bad, actually they were incredibly supportive... but because I'm not sure of anything right now. Thats my advice to anyone who is coming out: be as sure as you can be. If you don't, it will be a lot harder to deal with.

 

When I came out to my parents...it was out of the blue and I hadn't even been planning on it! I went upstairs to tell my parents goodnight and they were watching a political show. I asked them "What are your guys' opinions on gay marriage?" they're religious so they said "We don't have a problem with gays but marriage is for straight people." Then they of course asked "why" then I started crying because their answer wasn't very reassuring. I eventually sobbed out "I'm Kinsey 2.5!" which of course they didn't understand. So I elaborated in saying "I'm bisexual. But that doesn't mean I'm equally into boys and girls.If I went with percentages, I'd be 70 percent into guys and 30 percent into girls." My stepdad said I'm just confused and it's a phase and that he hopes I'll maker the "right" choice in the end. my mom works in a major school district and has seen tons of little kids who are very obviously gay. she doesn't think it's a choice but was conflicted with it because of her religious views. In the end, they both love me and only want what makes me happy for my future. You're parents love you too and they'll love you no matter who you are!

 

I followed my mom around the house when I was 14 until I finally sat down with her in our living room and she asked me if I did drugs, or stole something, stuff like that... Until I finally said "I'm gay." It was a weird situation.
For my dad, I was 17 and I called him and started talking to him about how his day was... Then I trailed off into how I wanted to talk to him about something (this makes it easier to come out because you can't really back out of it) and then my life went unreal and I said "I'm gay."
Good luck

King x

 

Coming out as trans was difficult. I had just made up with my parents a few months ago after not talking with them for eight years, nearly nine. They'd been really warm, caring, and open with me and we'd talked about a lot of the issues we'd had back then. For the first time in my life, I felt appreciated, and we got along.

When I was younger, from the time I was twelve or so, I tried writing down what I would tell them, but I would always throw it away or burn the letter out of fear. And to be honest, knowing them as they were then it was probably for the best. Since the day I started talking to them I'd began writing the letters again, and then fathers day came around.

I invited my dad to go out to his favourite little food stand, and we talked about life, and the way things had gone. All throughout the day I made sure to tell him that sometimes life doesn't give us a straightforward path. I told him how much I appreciated and cared about him. I told him about how much the day we started talking again and all the time since had meant to me. And then when it was time to part ways, I left him with an eight paragraph letter detailing my feelings and convictions.

I got a call later that night, from my parents. They told me that in retrospect, it hadn't been that much of a shock. I'd never dated, not guys, not girls, and so they knew something was up. I'd always been quite effeminate. And I always had cried very often and easily. They told me that, they weren't going to drive me away, and that it was my choice. That whatever path I needed to walk, they would be there for me.

 

I first came out to my mom. We were just hanging around the house until I finally sat down with her in our living room and I said I had to tell her something. It became like 20 questions. she asked me if I did drugs, stole, had sex for the first time, and more things like that. She asked "Are you gay?"? I said "Yes" and she freaked out. She told my dad and they both said it was a phase and don't make the choice to live like that. Things haven't turned out out the way I wanted.

Hopefully coming out to your parents goes a lot better. Good luck!

 

my dad read my Skype conversation with my boyfriend...
so it really wasn't my choice.

 

I told my mom at 1:11 am the day before I moved to college.

I said "Mom I have something important to tell you"

And she said "what"

And then I said "I'm bisexual" (this was when I still thought that I was bi..)

She was ok with me.

 

I told my mom first. She picked me up from school that day, and started asking if I had a girlfriend or liked any girl, so I told her I was gay. I then proceeded to explain to her that being gay does not mean wanting to be woman nor dressing like one lol. She was incredibly supportive,though. My mom told my dad, and the following day he asked me to confirm it.

 

I came out to my mom one day after classes. I sat her down and couldn't open my mouth for a few minutes. She didn't believe me at first, I'm not sure if she still does, and asked me if I was sure and said "what if you meet the perfect guy?", and I told her he wouldn't be perfect to me because he wasn't a girl. It took me a while to convince hr I was gay. I told my dad a few hours later, I think, and was just like "I like girls", he took it really well. Better than my mom did, which is weird because he says some homophobic things some times. I think it would be different if I was a guy, which really pisses me off, but whatever.
I wish they reacted better but it really did come out of the blue, I'm not stereotypically gay, at all, so.

 

I hadn't been planning on coming out when I did. It was a monday night and I'd just gotten back home around 10 from hangin out with the girls. I went upstairs to say goodnight and stuff. I saw that they were watching a political show and I asked them what their opinions were on gay marriage. Their answers were expected, because they're religious. They said "We have no problem with gays, even though it's wrong, but marriage is meant for straight people." I started crying then because their answer wasn't especially reassuring. So of course they asked me what I was crying and I just sobbed out "I'm Kinsey 2.5!" which of course I had to elaborate on and said "I'm bisexual but that doesn't mean I'm equally into boys and girls!" My mom works in a major school district here and has seen a TON of little kids who were very obviously gay, she doesn't believe it's a choice a lot of the time but it feels like it contridicts her religious views. Michael says it's completely a choice. In the end they don't really like it but they still love me and support me in whatever makes me happy.

 

I found it really difficult to tell parents. I sort of developed a technique for telling people. If I could say the words, "I've got something to tell you" to the person I was coming out to, it forced them into asking what it was. Then it created the opportunity, I couldn't go back, I'd just do it.....but I'm weird :s worked though!

I figured I'd tell my mum first (it seemed easier) so I did that technique and told her while my dad was out of the room. When he came back in, my mum was there to support me as I told him.

It is difficult working up the courage to do it, but I found that it was just on my mind so much that I had to do it for my own sanity. It doesn't really matter how you come out, just do whatever feels best to you. I'm sure it'll be ok. All the best!

 

I told my parents over the phone. Not the best way to come out, but there was obviously something going on with me. So I told them I had a crush on a girl. While I could have lied, it would have been too much effort. I would have had to come up with a story about having a male best friend who neither of them knew about, as well as devise a way to explain why things went sour with my roommate. Besides, I was lucky in that neither were religious or homophobic or had traditional expectations of me anyways when it comes to relationships. I'd already insisted for years that I had no interest in dating men; it just took me until this year to realize that I wanted to date women.

 

I simply told my mom I was gay. I broke the ice by asking her if she'd mind me going off to California for a week to camp with some people I met online. That broke the ice nicely. I was never intimidated about coming out to her, my mom has said before she wouldn't care I I was gay or not. Despite this, she did assume it was some sort of phase, until I kindly explained how vagina is not like a brussel sprout, I do have to try it to know its not for me...

I haven't told my dad yet. I haven't spoken to him in years though. He has a gay brother, so he would probably be okay with it. Humourously enough, I'm the only male heir on his side of the family, so that might tick him off a little.

Best of luck with your coming out! I for one found my mom to be the easiest one of all, since I knew she'd love me no matter what.

 

I told my parents with great shame and trepidation. It was in person.

 

It took a few attempts to come out to my parents as liking girls (as a girl). I was really nervous and always backed out of it. But then I met a girl and decided that it had to be done. So I went to them one evening when they were reading before going to sleep and asked them what they thought about that girl. They asked why I was wandering and I just sort of told them. My mum said she already knew. In the end all the stress was for nothing and everything between us is the same as before I came out. I'm so lucky.

I actually tried to talk to them earlier tonight as maybe being transgender but again - I'm backing out in the last minute. Parents are the hardest part of coming out!

Good luck with your coming out if you are about to!

 

I told my mom in person, while we were driving around - if I remember right, we were picking up some stuff for a family birthday party. My dad, on the other hand, I told via email, because I was afraid he would have a worse reaction (strangely, he actually reacted better than my mom, although long-term she's handled it better over the years - he's making his progress though).

I pretty much convinced myself to talk to them by envisioning the good things I could get out of it, regardless of their reactions. There were some bad possibilities I was envisioning too, but I tried not to think about them as best I could, and the more I focused on the good stuff, the easier the idea seemed, until I finally did it.

 

My coming out to my parents sounds like something out of a soap opera. I made a diary with faked entries for a whole month, including talking about my then-crush, and hid it under my pillow the day my mom makes my bed. When I came home from school, we all talked about it, and after my parents made me promise never to tell most of my relatives (who are homophobic anyways) it all worked out well.