Alright, so I didn't really know where to post this cause it's kinda my story so far and my doubts, hope it's fine anyway. Let's just say that ever since i was 12 I've had doubts about my sexuality, but with the years I've learnt a lot about myself and so on, so long story short, I've realized i'm bi. April 2011 i met a girl, on one of the forums i used to spend time on and after a while another girl always from that forum and I decided to meet up with this girl. And we actually did, and as weird as it is, it was love at first sight for me. Obviously not for her. Now, I'm really shy and definitely not an outspoken person, and till that day I had never been into anyone, so the whole experience was really weird for me. Days after I met her I was so giddy that I actually couldn't hold it in, and I came out to two of my friends. It wasn't hard at all, but other than them no one elese knows, even though I know my mom has doubts, but she has never brought the subject up. Needless to say, nothing ever happened with that girl, but I'm still glad I met her: she was my first real crush I guess and thanks to her I managed to come out to a couple of people. I know that's not a lot at all, but back then to me it was enough. Now back to the present day. I just moved in with my father that I haven't seen ever since I was 2 and my brother, and I'm starting to get to know my 12 uncles and aunts and all my cousins so everything's brand new. I still know no one, and I probably won't till i go to college in january so I'm kinda stalling, I guess. I would like to tell my father about me eventually but i'm not sure. I know they would accept me cause one of those 12 uncles is gay and everybody loves him just the same, but I think that everything's so new here, and there's still so much I need to take in, that I'm actually scared. Besides I think everybody has made an image of me up that is just not me, and I don't want to "upset" them, we could say. And obviously I'm not confident enough around them just yet, so I'll have to keep it all in for a while I guess, without no one to vent to. It's just so weird, being miles and miles away from home, with people I don't know, no friends and no way to make some new and, at the same time, I'm really excited because here I won't have to hide as much as I did before, it won't be as hard, even though it won't even be' easy, and I'm eager to start this "new life" that I've found myself in. Yeah, probably this wasn't the right place to post this, I guess I was really just venting, so feel free to delete it.
Maybe this fresh start is exactly what you need. Seeing as their accepting of your gay uncle, I don't see them reacting negatively towards you. Just take your time and tell them when you're ready.
Maybe you could start by telling that gay uncle? Even if you don't know him that well, he could probably give you some pointers on what to expect from the rest of the family.
I already thought about telling my uncle but point is, i don't know him at all, so he's not an option for now, i need to be close to a person for me to open up, and it's taken my years to do it with two close friends. I mean, yes he'll be' the first to know, but I feel like all the se relatives have so many expectations that developed over the years, that now I feel like letting them down, if that makes any sense? Plus, I really wouldn't know where to turn if things actually turned out bad cause my mom, the only person who's been with me for 19 years, is an ocean away.
