As in the title, I came out to a trusted friend yesterday whilst driving. Don't try this if they are driving! Because of the sport we do together, there is a high degree of trust between us, so I started with the question of "how much should I trust you?" as he is only the second person I've told and my wife still doesn't know. Thats next Saturday (gulp) After he successfully answered that, I uttered those words that I have never said to another human being before .......... "I am gay". Is it just me or do other folk on here find those three words so liberating? For me it's like running and flying free, being honest, being authentic, being just me. No mask, no veneer, no role playing, just the raw genuine me! I'm 48 so alot of repression and denial in there. His voice changed pitch abit but was totally supportive and said that it didn't change anything and I was exactly the same person he had always known! He just had abit more information about me! What a star! Appreciate that not every coming out will be this easy or supportive but this is definetely improving my confidence. Easy wins first seems a great idea here. And if anyone is thinking Swimmy is posting alot this morning, yeah, you're right. Wife is out the house and I'm not having to covertly post. (!) Stay strong and be true to yourself Jim
Yay! Good for you. I'm hoping that the positive responses serve to fortify you for the negative ones if they do come at some point. That first step is always really hard. Take a deep breath because... you made it!
Congratulations! I've never really said the words 'I'm gay' when telling people, it tends to be the guessing game in which I tell them there is something I need to tell them and then they go through like 500 questions before actually guessing that I'm gay.
Thanks guys, Lewissss, firstly love the avatar, maybe in the right place I might wear the T shirt, one day. Secondly, like the idea of making them guess, but we are both in late 40s and the journey was only 150 miles so probably not quite long enough to get to the right conclusion.:lol: Obviously being in the closet for 30+ years has honed my deceiving abilities. Both really good friends said they didn't have a clue and I hide it well. Dam, could make dating tough!
Congrats! It's immensely liberating when you come out to someone you care about and they are supportive! I just recently came out to my best friend, worried that I would lose him, and he's more excited about it than I am haha. He told me that he already suspected but that he doesn't care, and he's eager to get me into the clubs downtown to get me a guy and so that I can play wingman and get him some girls. This is only the first step to you becoming truly free about your sexuality!
As a joke and way to test people I told I was gay on april 4th. Got some interesting texts but my best friend told me it changed nothing and he supported me. I got a guilty feeling since I wasn't 'gay', and said thanks but april fools. He told me he had a feeling it was but wanted to be safe regardless.... it's a nice feeling.
Swimmy you're great! YES - you know I'm only in the coming out process recently. Even when I just admitted it properly to myself I started to find it massively liberating. I've also found - I don't know if others will echo this - that I can now enjoy things, like listening to music, again, in a way I haven't for years. I've been so shut-off from myself I couldn't enjoy or identify with music or artists properly for a long time. Other things too, but that's a big and unexpected effect it's had on me! I feel I have more energy for life now - everything means more! (I'm now out to 5 people, including my husband, and am looking forward to more people knowing fairly soon!)
That's great, Jim! Congratulations! And with every person you tell, it gets a little easier to tell the next. Making great progress! Maxx
BBird75 and Maxx You guys rock, thanks so much for the love. Need it tonight as my plans to tell my wife have just taken a slight delay, see separate thread. BBird75, you are so right! Music, smells, scenery, it just keeps getting better. I could not do this without you guys(&&&)
