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My First Coming Out (Awesome Indeed :D)

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by LeCartographe, Sep 2, 2012.

  1. My first coming out was by far the scariest thing in my life (and I've lived with divorced parents who fight, death in the family, and other issues). I really had contemplated how I should come out to each one of my friends. I knew it had to be done soon. I hated that I always seem to lie and deceive about "seeing" a girl and such. It wasn't right. And worse...I knew ONE day my friends would have to find out. "So, you're 26 and single and have NEVER had a girlfriend...what's up with that?". In this world, I have 5-6 best friends (since they know me the best out of everyone, hence "best"). I finally picked a day. July 18th. Here's what happened.


    One person whom I consider to be one of my best friends is Greek. Pretty good looking, fit, a ladies' man, fun to be around, and one of the nicest people that God put on this earth. No feelings for him, since they were overtaken with him being like a brother to me. Our relationship I say was very good, and he'd always told me in the past that I was 'never a disappointment', that although he's a popular person, that I'm 'cool as well' in my own right, and that he loves me as a close friend.

    He, along with family, were going to go to Greece for a month to visit family and such. So, I figured that THIS would be a good time to come out to him, since I couldn't wait any longer. He plays college level soccer, very busy, therefore I didn't know when I would get the opportunity again. I basically asked him a week before he had to leave, "I was wondering if we could spend the day together doing stuff, ya know, just bonding and such?". He told me that that seemed a little weird since it seemed kinda 'date-ish' and that he just doesn't just 'plan everything out' with his friends. I told him that I had to talk to him about some personal issues going on and wanted to talk to him before he went to Greece. He said of course.

    But the thing was....he wanted to go see a movie with me. I for one DON'T like to go see movies and particularly in this case because that wouldn't be constructive and I couldn't talk to him about...you know....me being gay and all.

    With frustration from feeling unable to tell what was up, I conjured up a long message on Facebook stating what was truly up. I had it up, ready to go, for literally 3-4 hours. My heart ran like Usain Bolt in a marathon. So....at 1:15 in the morning...I close my eyes....and push "Send message". I close my laptop. And await the longest night I've EVER experienced in my life.

    ............suddenly, at 3:50 in the morning, I get this random text message on my phone. It's him. He states "dude, I'm sorry that it's late, but I got your message. And honestly, I couldn't care less about how you want to live your life. It doesn't affect me, so why shouldn't I care? Your pal, ____. Btw, I was thinking of doing something more constructive. Do you want to just go grab lunch and get some coffee tomorrow? I can pick you up from your house, if needed". :'). I WAS SO HAPPY!!!!!!! Thank you God!!(!)

    Cut to meeting my friend later that day.

    He picks me up at a transit station, I get into his car. He asks how I'm doing. I ask him...how he feels about me being gay. He asks me how I knew, if I was dating anyone, and yada yada. I asked him if he ever suspected I was gay. He said that he never DID :eek: (I thought I was more obvious), until I told him that I wanted to chill with him and talk about some personal issues. He said it just like "came to him". We get lunch, at Five Guys, and continue to talk endlessly, as if nothing happened. Then we went to the drive thru of McDonalds (which I said that they have 'ghetto coffee', haha), drive to his college campus, and sit in his car (in some shade) and talk for around 2-3 hours. Best bonding time ever.

    He told me as well that he didn't care if I was straight, gay, bi, Muslim, Jewish, or whatever (!). As long as I didn't like kill his brother or arson his house, he would always be my friend, help me out, and wasn't ashamed that he was close friends now with a gay guy. And that he'd want to chill with me when he had time next semester when he wasn't busy with soccer.

    And he liked the fact that I can hook him up with girls that he likes, haha. :lol:

    My Greek friend is the best! I wish more people were like him, agreed? :thumbsup:
     
    #1 LeCartographe, Sep 2, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 2, 2012
  2. ForceAndVerve

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    Agreed!!! :thumbsup:

    What a great story, you are soooooooooooooo lucky to have a guy like that in your life! Thanks for sharing! :slight_smile:

    Also do you have any future plans on coming out to any of your other firends or family?
     
  3. I've come out to my close friends (7 in fact), my R.A., and my brother.

    Don't think I want to come out to parents yet, because I still live with them (during the summer), so when I say graduate college, THEN I will. If they don't take it well, I can pack my bags and leave. And at least now I have a support network of friends who have my back in case of that happening. We run deep, hahaha. :lol:

    But I'm thinking of coming out to a few more people (people in college, other friends). It gets easier after the first person. It's kinda fun, actually, to be honest haha.
     
  4. ForceAndVerve

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    With regard to your parents, yes I tihnk that would be the best approach! :grin:
     
  5. Sayu

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    What a nice story! Congrats on your first coming out! :slight_smile: And you friend is amazing indeed! :slight_smile:
     
  6. natam

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    Very nice story! Every gay guy should have friends like that :slight_smile:
    I was fortunate too in this department to have an awesome friend who really couldn't care less. I think what made me really happy was that everything was the same. Nothing changed for him. Can you identify with this?
    Anyway, actually it's pretty funny that the two friends I came out to both said they never suspected. I was actually pretty sure people sort of knew. Guess not haha. It's funnier that way.
    I too think that the best approach is waiting with the parents. If things take the wrong turn (very hopefully it won't happen), it won't be awkward. Wish you the best!
     
  7. Yep. My relationship with him, and basically all of my friends have not changed. And he knows that A. I don't have a crush on him at all or feelings like that (although he is very good looking), and B. He knows that I know that he's straight as an arrow, so he has nothing to worry about. :slight_smile: