I recently stumbled upon this site after coming out to family and friends. I wish I would've found it earlier but I'm glad it can still serve as a way for others to come out. It wasn't until last week while I was home on military leave from Afghanistan that I came out. Now the first time I found myself physically attracted to other guys came at a fairly young age. My parents growing up never pushed religion down my throator said any negative remarks about a persons sexual orientation. I guess I got my fear and discomfort of being gay from my environment and the way I saw most Americans perceived homosexuality. It wasn't until I was 15 that I had my first sexual encounter at a sleepover at my friends house. We both swore it would never happen again and it was an accident. Which I knew was a lie because I had enjoyed it but I let myself think it was wrong. It wasn't until five years down the road when I joined the U.S Army that I had my next sexual encounter. I believe a part of the reason I opened up was being on my own and in Hawaii were there was a higher LGBT population then I was use to. Still it took until I was 24 years old and on leave from Afghanistan to completely feel comfortable enough to come out to the ones I love. It was a slow process that took sitting down with each person and telling them. The support I recieved and continue to recieve was amazing!! I'm still slowly telling those I am close with at work. Telling those in the military to me is different then telling family and close friends. But I'm happy to say that I've already started the process. Every single person I tell feels like a wieght lifted off my back. There is no greater feeling then being able to tell those you love the truth and recieve amazing support! I hope I can help others with their process and be there for those who are having trouble. At first I wanted to beat myself up for not doing it sooner but then I realized everyone has a different stage of their life where they feel comfortable in coming out. I also have to say my three day trip to Boystown in Chicago def. helped. I just felt like It's where I belonged and had an amazing time. Which in brought me to the point where I was finally comfortable.
Hi there and welcome to EC. I'm glad you found this site. Your story is an amazing one. Being in the military must bring a whole different set of concerns in the coming out process. It's never easy to come out (but getting easier every year with the societal changes) and it is a long process that I think you will find will taper off with the intensity with each person you talk to. It sounds like it has gone exceptionally well for you. That's awesome. I know for me it's all I thought about all day every day and now the thoughts are getting to be less and less. Let us know how it goes for you in the future. It's always good to read these positive stories.
Thanks! And you are so right it is the only thing I have been able to think about. I think it will only get better once I adjust to everyone knowing. It's almost like an emotional high the way it has made me feel. Thanks for the support and I will def. be using this site in the future!
First, thanks for your service in uniform. I'm glad you feel this weight off your shoulders. When you return to Afghanistan, keep your head down and come back and enjoy life.
Welcome to EC. I'm glad you've had such a positive experience. (*hug*) I just wanted to post to let you know about OutServe, an organization dedicated to active duty LGBT people. If you haven't heard of them, I suggest checking them out. It could be a great resource in getting advice and sharing experiences with other LGBT people in the military.
